To be depressed at Christmas alone

[igdeaem]

Already, I know.

Don’t worry about Claire, she’s actually cheered me up although not in the way she expected

It's ok, OP, you can join me for Christmas - I'm going to Clairetree1's house.

I'm going to repeatedly criticise the Chistmas dinner, tell innappropriate jokes in front of the children, entertain everyone with some thrash metal versions of carols (?!) played at top volume, then round it all off by getting extremely drunk, knocking over the Christmas tree, and vomiting over her carpet.

It'll be great fun - and she can choose to enjoy it. :)

claire but who are you to decide who has genuine problems or not?

OP "I don’t really fancy volunteering, probably sounds selfish, but have done it in the past and found it a bit miserable"

agree. I don't really do Xmas so I've done volunteering for that reason, and also a couple of times to help out with some things run by friends. It was quite depressing, which I hadn't expected - I think partly because a lot of people were there to get away from something and wishing the day away.

It's a case of figuring out how the day goes fastest I think.

Clairetree you're such a dick on almost every thread you're on. Why is that?

OP I have a friend who gets properly depressed around Christmas. They often go to SE Asia over Christmas as it's not celebrated there generally. Maybe you don't want to go so far afield but I am in London and everything pretty much carries on as usual here, we had Christmas Day lunch in a Lebanese restaurant last year and it was brilliant with not so much as a shred of tinsel in sight. Cinemas are open on Boxing Day as are all the shops.

Claire supposedly works in education too, which frankly I find utterly terrifying.

Claire supposedly works in education too, which frankly I find utterly terrifying

I think the key word is supposedly! The other biggest bitch plopper on MN also suggests she works in education. I think they think by suggesting that it gives their posts gravitas.

MissMoneyPlant

@Clairetree1 reminds me of a certain type of person my Dad used to call a Fun Inspector. There was a thread earlier about summer holidays next year and booking flights. Claire swooped in like the grim reaper to tell the OP not to bother getting excited as Brexit would likely mean no flights anywhere next year. Just see her there twat plopping all over the place. It's funny at times but other times the spite just beams out.

Try to look at it from another viewpoint. One good thing about being alone is that you don't have to please anyone else. You could spend all day in your PJs if you wanted to, eat pudding or pizza (or both) for dinner. Feet up in front of the telly, beer in hand, packet of crisps on lap, etc, etc. Worse things happen at sea, as my dear old mum used to say and may I be one of the first to wish you A Merry Christmas. [santa]

there are a lot of hotels (not all of them expensive) or coach trips that do Christmas breaks. Alternatively - treat yourself -decide a menu - doesn't have to be turkey! - have a fancy pudding & buy something special to wear & get netflixs or similar as a treat. If you don't have that much money: get some recipes & make something different & treat yourself that way & go for a walk in a park nearby or book yourself Christmas lunch in a pub

hadn't thankfully noticed fun inspectors,😂😂.

OP, I've always loved Christmas and gone to lots of effort to make it really lovely. The smallest group I have had for Christmas dinner in the last 15 years was 9 and it felt empty. We usually have 20ish and I've always loved it.
Not this year. We still have the crowd but I have lost my mojo and want nothing more than to book myself into a hotel in any country which does not celebrate Christmas, hunker down with room service and a read a book.

So I can offer you two choices: join us (one more guest has no impact on logistics) and spend a couple of days enjoying the strange family potitics play itself out while I get psychologically withdraw, burbling to myself and tutting about ungrateful teens/sarcastic mother etc, or (my preference at this moment) you come and cook/make decorations etc. I'll pay for you to stay at the local B+B and you can come over every day and throw yourself into family Christmas at my house while I sneak off with a suitcase of novels and a bottle of wine. How about it?

I was on my own for Xmas two years ago and went to a charity organised dinner for people spending the day alone. Sounds grim but it was nice! Carvery style dinner in the local pub, and we all got a big tin of biscuits
I had fun, came home and slept all afternoon, then watched Netflix and drank Baileys in the evening. I actually enjoyed it but there is a huge thing about Christmas being for friends and family. On TV, adverts, magazines, everywhere. It can be very sad for people who don't have anyone and wish they did.

OP, I would suggest you start thinking about what you would like to do on Christmas Day. Obviously you can volunteer. I have and it was good fun. I enjoyed helping over the whole Christmas period infact. If that’s not for you, do you you have some people you could invite to yours for the day?

If you do end up having Christmas by yourself it really isn’t the worst thing that can happen. Plan the day with things you what to do, Christmassy or otherwise, and make sure you arrange to see friends over the period.

The thing to remember is so many people will be surrounded by family on Christmas day but actually have a horrible time, for numerous reasons, and envy your freedom and peace. Your Christmas may not be your ideal but you can still make it an enjoyable one.

Totally agree with you on the volunteering thing OP.

What are your hobbies? I don't know where you are based but a (happily) single friend of mine loves country walks on goes on one organized on Christmas Day - maybe through meetup.com or something like that which I think does group lunches for people who are alone at Christmas too.

I work Christmas Day - takes the pressure off!

OR... surely you can't be the only Mumsnetter in your area in this position. Maybe the power of Mumsnet could bring those MNers who are going to be alone for whatever reason this Christmas and would like to get together for a drink or a walk or something like that...?

clairetree Just out of interest, what are you doing on Xmas day?

Hi Op, If you would like some company and have a spare room there are lots of international students who would love to share Christmas with you. Have a look at this website if you are interested www.hostuk.org/

clairetree Just out of interest, what are you doing on Xmas day?

volunteering if there is a life available, but as there is no public transport and I don't have car, most likley cuddling the cat and binge watching itv hub.

Sometimes DC are here, mostly not. if here, will volunteer with me

Start planning now. Spoil yourself. If you can’t go could you cook a gourmet meal, hold back a movie you are really excited to see or a book you really want to read? Lots of pamper presents for yourself?

I know it will be tough, it’s the build up to the day rather than the day itself. Think of it as a day when time stops and you can do what ever you want - eat, drink, have a bubble bath anything decadent!

The company Large Outdoors do a Christmas walking break. I'm sure there are others. Do some research now and then you can make plans.

Claire swooped in like the grim reaper to tell the OP not to bother getting excited as Brexit would likely mean no flights anywhere next year

what is wrong with you? The Op asked about booking flights for next summer, I pointed out that noone yet knows what is happening to UK air travel after Brexit, I answered her question.

Flights for next year are very cheap, because no one knows if they will actually fly or not, and there will be no refunds if not.

Agin, the OP asked, I answered.

If people don't like the answers they are given, they should maybe not ask for them.

I tell the truth. Some people don't like that

I've never noticed you before @Clairetree1 but I partly agree with you. It really is 'just a day' and it's a choice for the OP to spend it alone or branch out as others have suggested.

Thank you

I really don't see how it "helps" the OP to have everyone piling in saying "o isn't that awful" rather than pointing out its only a bad thing if you decide it is, and you really don't have to.

I tell the truth. Some people don't like that

I've seen you be challenged on your "truth" quite a few times only to disappear from the thread till the danger has passed and then reappear spouting your nonsense a few pages later

You don't tell the "truth" at all, you offer opinions, just like the rest of us, only your delivery is very often noticeably unpleasant, scathing and abrupt. That is of course your right to do but you will be challenged on it.