Mother encouraging her child to scream in restaurant

[user1485342611]

I was in a restaurant and a mother with a baby aged about 10-12 months and in a high chair were at a table near us. The baby was playing happily with a plastic toy when the mother suddenly dropped her spoon on the floor. He thought it was funny and gave a happy squeal. So the mum kept pretending to drop the spoon to make him laugh. The problem was that each time the laugh got more and more high pitched and in the end he was literally screaming with excitement every time she went to 'drop' the spoon.

This went on for ages and people were turning around and giving her annoyed looks and two women at the table beside them moved away.

AIBU to think she was being really inconsiderate and that this went beyond just a bit of happy playing and strayed into noisy and disruptive behaviour (from the mum, obviously, not the baby).

Well you can't be that noise sensitive then Bette.

Maisypops I totally agree with you. But I suspect some posters on here behave like the mother in the OP and don't like seeing their behavior criticised. Far easier to call us all 'miserable bastards' than face up to their own rudeness.

I have parents who do this. I was in a station waiting room when a child aged about six started jumping very loudly and counting. The mum said "See if you can do a hundred jumps!' And, of course, the child obliged. Grrr!

@thistle, thank you for coming back to me. Unfortunately in this world there are inconsiderate dicks. I’m quite feisty and speak up, but I appreciate not everyone is the same.

Lydiaatthebarre
I agree.
I've started to conclude from similar threads that anyone who replies with a totally (deliberately) missing the point reply probably does the same as the unreasomable and inconsiderate person in the post.
E.g. AIBU to think that costa is no place for tablets on full blast. This morning I had to listen to 45 mins of Peppa pig on repeat complete with mummy doing the voices loudly.
1 - Its only Peppa pig. Lighten up OP. I suppose people should never even interact with their child.

1. It's a cafe. If you wanted quiet then you should have gone to the library. Of course there'll be kids there. Should mothers be confined to the house in case they offend anyone?
2. It's much better to see parents interacting with their children than staring at their phones.
3. Gosh some of you must be proper miserable sods. You're getting wound up over a parent talking to their child about Peppa pig. Bore off will you?!

Most of us are of the common sense view that adults are more than capable of interacting with others in an appropriate way whilst showing consideration for others.

SheGotBetteDavisEyes - I completely agree. In a world of effing and jeffing parents it's not a big deal to me if I hear a kid happy. It's not that deep. I could only get so mad about it.

You missed the classic “I suppose you’re all perfect parents then?”, Maisy. I love that one, in all it’s spectacular lunacy.

So the OP has asked everyone their opinion and if anyone says they might not entirely agree you guys have bothered to write a list of reasons we might not agree?

I'm all for little ones being in restaurants but I can't bear people encouraging their children to shriek.

Meant hate parents not have!

Yes I've come the same conclusion Maisypops.

"It's lovely to hear a baby laughing'

" It's so much better than a parent ignoring their child'

'You sound miserable'

'It's a café not a library'

And then these parents wonder why other customers don't just approach them if they're annoyed

I was wondering why you were still screaming in restaurants, Jayfee...

TigerlilyMoon
I've already said I wouldn't expect a baby to be silent. There's some totally reasonable levels of interaction.

But to be honest, yes I do think people who condone a grown adult showing zero consideration to others whilst actively encouraging their child to be loud probably do (to a greater or lesser extent) display lack of consideration to others.

I just couldn't get that mad about it. I deal my kids and they're always super respectful and quiet and kept busy etc but you know what, I'm sure we can all appreciate having a baby can be bloody difficult and there isn't a manual and at worst I'd suggest the mother was the brightest spark. I honestly couldn't seethe about it though. I'd either say something or be like 'meh'.

wasn't the brightest spark*

Well you can't be that noise sensitive then Bette

Oh right. Well, you'd know best.

SheGotBetteDavisEyes - Haha I know. We've been perfectly polite but unless we agree with them word for word our opinion doesn't matter. Superb.

Several grammatical errors there Tigerlilly. Only mentioning it because I saw you sniggering at someone else's mistakes on another thread about an hour ago.

‘Cinnamon in Ranelagh ’
Oh God so true ! Performance parenting southside coffee houses and cafes lately is 🤢

It does sound a bit weird, Bette, to be fair. You’re sensitive to noise, but don’t mind kid’s screaming?

Not mad about the mother (from my perspective anyway - as you say she could be rude, she could be oblivious, she might not be that switched on), just find it a bit odd that anyone could look at a situation where the parent was clearly being a inconsiderate and start arguing that obviously there's nothing wrong with it.

There's a difference between your difference of opinion (meh it's probably annoying but I wouldn't get worked up about it. Sometimes we've all got it wrong) and the almost obtuse 'well the other day I saw a child ignored for a whole 45.6 hours because the parent was on their phone. I'm sure they'd have loved a game'.

My irritation is more towards people who seem to meet any challenge towards unreasonable noise levels with drivel like 'so people shouldn't even talk to their children' which suggests they probably are inconsiderate as they seem to think it's totally ok behaviour.

A happy child is one thing, screeching is quite another. It's fine in a playground or somewhere that people can easily move away if it gets too much, but not in a cafe or restaurant it's very inconsiderate.
I had a screecher on a 2 1/2 hour train journey last week. The train was relatively busy and my seat reserved (with power and table so that I could work) so I couldn't easily move. When they also joined my connection, in the same carriage I decided to that standing by the toilet for the 30 mins was the lesser of two evils

No Bette. If you can bear loud shrieking that a large number of posters have said would upset them then you really can't be particularly sensitive to all noise.

Lydiaatthebarre - Love that I have a stalker, welcome! Again it was someone having a rant like you guys are having now about something inconsequential. I just think people need to chill and realise they don't need to get stressed about everything and can't we laugh some stuff off?? I honestly don't see why you needed to stalk me though? Have I said something to hurt you in some way? In which case report away and then maybe you'll calm down.

I noticed your unpleasant post also Tigerlilly, and then the irony of you posting with errors on here. It's not stalking, don't flatter yourself. I was just disgusted by your post and your name stuck in my mind.

I assume it was the same with Lydia.

MaisyPops - Where have I argued that there's nothing wrong with it? My kids aren't screaming because I know better therefore I do better. This mother might not know better in which case say something or leave it.