If being a SAHM is a job then do working mothers have two jobs?

[Banana8080]

....if no extra help eg cleaners etc

This is a silly thread just designed to try to dismiss sahms. Whatever makes you feel good op.

Being a parent isn’t a job, but taking care of a child all day is. And a stay at home parent is taking care of a child all day. That’s why if parents wish to be elsewhere during the day, they are required to pay other adults to mind their children for them.

I'd say the difference between being a Sahm and a working mum is the sahm has to entertain and feed and then clean up after the child in the day. That is work, and working parents pay a lot to nurseries for that service from 6pm-8am the job is the same though with baths, tantrums, stories, broken sleep, cbeebies and then breakfast.

Being a SAHP is a perfectly valid option that people may choose to do.

Being a parent is hard work. You are no more a parent because of whether you work or stay home.

For me (and maybe I'll be in the minority) the way forward is to say being a SAHP is a valuable and perfectly decent thing to do without needing to go down the irritating route of 'but it's a job' arguments (emg. It's busier than a job because I clean and I do childcare and I do household admin and I cook... And insert any other tasks everyone does). By removing silly 'it's a job arguments and valuing it as a thing in itself then it solves a lot of issues.

Both my husband and I are shift workers both full time hours but work opposite shifts so yes I do all the same a SAHM does and go to work as does my husband, all childcare with no help , shopping , housework etc

Of course it's a job. It's childcare!

Yes, I definitely think so, I've always worked full time except when on maternity leave snd even with a baby and two pre schoolers, life was much easier and less pressured on maternity leave than when at work. I don't switch off from the DC when I am at work and they are at nursery/school, Am still juggling assemblies and Dr's appointments, phone calls to school (often go into work at the weekend to make up time from these). Now I have more pressure in mornings and late afternoon, arrive home exhausted and have to start cooking dinner at 7pm. As the children have got older, the SAHM I talk to all seem to have time to be there when DC get in from school, oversee homework and cook dinner. Their DC have dinner long before the evening sports activity. The other night, I wasout at a sports club with them, had to start cooking at 9pm, dinner at 9. 30pm. Or up at 5 am to prep food (common among working mums in my office). Most definitely doing two jobs. When they were in nursery the comparison was more like 1.5 jobs due to the longer hours and just having one organisation to liaise with.

I don't think being a SAHP is a job. I think it's work.

Sahp is not a job. It is much more than that in terms of the benefits it CAN bring to a family in the early years. Most Sahp are not defined by this role for long however much as people like to pigeon hole them as unambitious Stepfords. Most will go on to be fully fledged tax payers one day.

I go to work to get away from my mum job. I work somewhere pretty pressured, but it’s still easier than being at home with my EASY 10 month old (literally textbook dream baby). I just find being at home with him doing cooking and cleaning etc relentless, at least at work I get a quiet cup of tea

When I'm at work I still get phone calls/questions from DM/MIL/nursery (my DS' childcare).

Do you? Why? I never did.

I guess the analogy would be that SAHM = one full time job and working Mum = two part time jobs? Feels like a weird comparison to push though.

It's not a job because it's unpaid.

A working parent doesn't have two jobs because they aren't looking after their child during their working hours.

Being a SAHP isn't a job. Having children is a life choice, it's not a job.

I was a SAHM for 3 years and would never describe it as a "job." It's hard but I can think of a lot of occupations that are probably more difficult and stressful.

I hate this whole song and dance about SAHP and WOHP, if you're happy with whatever you're doing then who cares.

Who cares.

Parenting is hard. Even harder when people try to have a race to the bottom to see who has it harder.

No one would ask a father if he does two jobs.

You’re a parent.

You might have a paid job, you might not.

I guess it depends on how you define 'job'. For some, a job is something you get paid for, for others, it simply means work.
I guess you could argue it is a job if it saves more money on childcare fees than you would earn.
The only people who really give a shit though, are goady fuckers who are trying to imply that sah has no value.

A lot of father's probably don't do the lions share of cooking and cleaning though after a day at work. I suspect it's mostly the wimmin'

I don't think there is a cutoff point morning and evening at which the two jobs can be judged equal...a WOHP would generally have more to fit in from 6pm onwards what a SAHM who has been able to shop, cook dinner, start bathtime etc a bit earlier ( not always, I know). And the same in the mornings. I'm often doing child related admin at lunchtime too. If I discuss my schedule with SAHM with children the same age, they are shocked that I get so little time to myself.

Must stop clicking on these threads. Basically an excuse to slag off SAHMs. "Well it's all right if the kids aren't at school" "I work full time, do all the housework, and magically manage to look after the kids during the working day as well". Anyone who dares to suggest the opinion parents are the best people to look after their kids is publicly pilloried. SAH (let's face it) Ms are pathetic and a waste of space, WOHPs are saints. Etc etc and so on for ever amen.

People make choices based on what is best for them and their children. The public whipping square should butt out.

Sorry, should be saying SAHP!

Lots of aspects of both being full time are incredibly tough e.g. being woken up several times during the night and then having to get up at six, shower, do make up etc.. and haul ass into a long working day. I miss mat leave when I could wear pyjamas and drink coffee late into the morning.

SAHP is working, but it's not a job.

I think it's full on looking after children all day, but I don't think you can call looking after your own children a job. It's quite nice spending the day with your own children.

There is a book about this, if anyone is interested.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Second_Shift