To be pissed off about where we live?

[Beautifulblue]

Just a rant because I'm just PO tbh. Me (27), partner (28) & 1 daughter who is 1yo. We live (& were born in Brighton) we've made do up until this point with a 1 bed (cheap at 800pcm) but really need 2 bedrooms now DD is getting older.. problem is, we can't afford it. DP works full time, I work part time. Almost all (half decent & I mean HALF) 2 beds are £1200+ where we live. Even places within 5+ miles are the same price. How is this fair? We're being forced out of the town we were born in because of ridiculous rent prices & low wages! I just don't know what we're going to do. Places around 15-20 miles away you can get a 2 bed house for 900pcm & the wages are the same there. But all our family/friends & jobs are here. To top it off estate agents want fees, guarantors & your first born to even consider renting to you. Sick of greedy landlords & tight employers! AIBU to think you should be able to afford to stay in the town you were born in!?

my dh commutes to london 35 miles away we live in essex i was born in london-either move out or try and get more qulaifications youre not the only one

Too cool for school does have a cost OP. I daresay you were warned!

yes. if you are saying you didn't get the qualifications you could have done then that will be impacting on your earning potential now.

teens have opportunities, they don't all take them, which is devastating, because we teachers know what impact it will have a few years down the line, but we are just naggy old uncool people who are ignored

At least you are honest with yourselves about why you are earning so low, not trying to blame anyone else.

Can you come and speak to some of my year 10s please

Claim your benefit, you pay your taxes, look at housing benefit

Interesting discussion.
Just wanted to say loads of posters saying wait until you are established and in your 30’s before having kids - the problem with that is that for lots couples that is too late and treatment for fertility issues gets harder as you get older .

bread your £620 4 bed house would be ateast Double that, in my bit of the NE. In fact, scratch that, it would probably be a HMO at £620 per room.

YABU! What has gone wrong in the world that a hard working young family can't rent a small apartment in a normal town! And for you being too cool for school, well I was the opposite, did everything right (PhD in Comp Sci), and although I do have a good salary I am in a smallish 2 bedroom with my 2 daughters well outside of Paris, which is where I work. I have a super old car and most of my holidays are camping. My parents have a giant house and fancy everything and did since my dad started working after his PhD in EE. I am terrified for the younger generation, even with hard work they will have so much hardship. Any uni will leave them in debt and nothing but low pay and expensive housing. It's infuriating. We need to start a revolution!

I have relatives who live in Hove. The housing costs are horrendous but look at most major cities and you will find the same. I go with moving away and establishing a life in a less densely populated area and where costs will be reasonable. You will survive. I have moved several times to eventually be able to afford to buy. You have do do what is right for you.

I feel for you OP, your situation sucks but you’re not alone. Millions of people have to commute to their place of work for exactly the reasons you state. Tbh, it’s just not that big a deal once you get used to it. Travelling a 10/15 Miles for family visits is nothing. You can make life so much harder for yourself (or your dh can for himself) by stubbornly refusing to compromise on this stuff.
As it happens I’m not far from you ( Kent / East Sussex borders) and I have had family living around brighton and hove for years. There are lots of areas not too far away with better rental prices if you’re willing to compromise on a commute.
Good luck with it all.

I haven't RTwholeFT but I sympathise Beautifulblue.

The same happened to me years ago.
I'm originally from a small, picturesque place.
In the 90s it became vair fashionable with second home owners, so not only did rent and house prices increase but the housing stock was significantly reduced and a lot of the second homes were left empty for many months of the year.

DH and I bought a doer upper not far from my home town and we climbed the property ladder from there.
We've moved plenty of times since, we could afford to buy a good house there now but we won't!

I know it stinks, it really does but the only way out of it is to move somewhere cheaper and preferably buy there instead of renting.
It's that or suck it up and stay put.

I feel your pain op it sucks

And as for ‘well that’s just the market’ the market is not a workable system because in ten years time if this wage suppression/price inflation continues there will be no one in a 30 mile radius to clean your house or pour your skinny latte or mind your dcs or wipe your elderly infirm parents’ bums or empty your bin or cut your hair or triage you in a&e or catch burglars in your neighbourhood

And then what?

Welcome to capitalist Britain. It’s only going to get worse under the Tories. Not a lot we can do about that until there’s a GE. OP why not do some ironing for other people it’s a great way of working from home that actually pays.

I totally understand your wish to move to a bigger place, we're a family of six in a 2 bedroomed home lol, me and husband have a pull out sofa bed in the front room, the two boys share, as do the two girls, however, we don't want to move because I grew up here, its a really beautiful area, just so damned expensive and no bigger homes that we could ever afford...not yet anyways!
So, we hold on and wait for the older two to earn a bit more and make their own lives, and then maybe, just maybe, we can sleep in a real bed again! lol.
My neck will be so grateful!

Someone said down thread about choices. Your choices are:

1. Train for a career. Yes I hear that you are 'family focussed'. So am I. So are most on here, being as its mumsnet. But we all have to pay the bills. And it seems your biggest problem is not your rent (that seems really reasonable for Brighton), but your salaries.
2. Move. For 800 you can get a 4 bed detached with garage here.
3. Stay in the 1 bed, as many many many families in Brighton/London and all the other premium places are, where it's all about LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION.

My best friend and boyfriend moved from Cambridge to up north about 20 years ago, so they could both set up home together. They could not have afforded to live near where they were brought up, in anything but a shoe box at 20 on starter salaries. CHOICES!

I'm a single mum and I'm really lucky that I live and was brought up in an affordable area in the midlands (I rent a 2 bed flat for £425pm). I would absolutely hate to have to move away from my family and friends because I couldn't afford somewhere to live. It's such a shame. SE prices are ridiculous.

I’m in Brighton too. We have a 2 bed bungalow for 1,095 in Portslade. Our last flat was 900 for a 2 bed flat in Portslade. I do see them a lot here for cheap (look on rightmobe.) 20/30 min into central on the bus

Have you looked in Portslade/hangleron/mile oak area? Still technically Brighton but much cheaper.

But I know the feeling op.

We can never buy in our hometown because it’s so expensive and we can’t afford a 3 bedroom. We were given our notice in our last flat as they wanted to sell but the council couldn’t house us. We managed to find our bungalow but it’s only a 2 bed and there’s 4 of us! (Both kids 3 and under though)

I own my own house and have a flat which we bought on a buy to let mortgage to give my brother and his family somewhere to live. It's a two bedroom flat and the mortgage is £364 a month. The ground rent is £70 a month and the insurances come to another £120. On top of that we are responsible for paying for anything to be fixed, such as the boiler and white goods. Painting and decorating. I charge him £750 a month so our £55k investment (deposit) earns us less than £200 a month. It's expensive to buy and keep property so that's why rents are high.

I wanted a nice house with en-suite bathroom and 5 bedrooms but I couldn't afford it in the town I grew up in so I bought a house 5 miles away. You pay your money and take your choices I'm afraid.

I was also too cool for school but I realised my mistake and went to university at 28 years old. It's rubbish that property is so dear but it's not like you don't have options

I'm so relieved reading my this thread to see is so common for people to move. I'm
In a similar situation, i live in South West London born and bred where all
My family and friends live. It's my comfort zone. I have 4 kids and 3 are in outstanding schools. We actually own a house but need to upsize and we cannot afford to do that where we live. So looks like we will have to move unfortunately. We looked at Brighton and it's actually a lot cheaper to where we are now, but I'm not too keen on the area. W have considered lots of areas, but for me the most imo is schools and a city. We liked Solihull but the things that puts me off is that the schools don't seem great as my kids are currently at outstanding schools. Also schools there are oversubscribed and I'm told I probably won't get good schools and probably won't even get the kids into same school and that really puts me off. We have been umming and arring over it for a while and can't decide. I wish we had done this when kids were younger. So op maybe you should do this live while your little one is young and not at school as that makes things so much harder.
If anyone knows a good place for us to move where their are excellent schools and a city ideally or close to one I'd love to hear ideas ??

I'm in the same area as you and understand how you feel. My family and our jobs are here and we are both low earners. I love my job though and wouldn't change it. Our budget was £950 we have viewed and have lived in several 2 bed properties for under that. From shoreham beach (£800 for 2 bed with access to swimming pool/gym) to Southwick £1000 (3 bed massive house but slightly dodgy area) to portslade £920 (2 bed tiny flat that you could barely swing a cat in!!)

I wouldn't move from here out of choice. I love being by the sea, there's always free events, things going on and plenty of places to explore with the kids without spending money. Neither of us drive but we don't need to, within 30 mins walking distance I have 4 parks, 3 supermarkets, the beach, a train station, lots of other shops and 3 regular bus services. I can get a bus every 10 mins and every hour all night. And I can get a bus/train almost anywhere else I want to, an all day ticket for Brighton is £4.40. For somewhere different I can pay £25 and travel 1hr40mins and go to London for the day with the kids where there's lots to do for free.

Have a look into 30hours free childcare - not sure you are eligible yet but should be once dd is 2 :)

OP you are unfortunately in the "squeezed middle" which is a pretty shit place to be.
To get a 2 bed place you either need to get a HA or council place (easier said than done) or to increase your income a fair bit.

It sounds like you are not on the same page as your DH though. What is his proposed way forward?

If one of the reasons for staying in Brighton is to be near family, can't any of them mind your DD so you can work fulltime?

@Touchmybum all her grandparents work full time to - they're all early 50's.

You are an articulate woman. I suspect your paper qualifications don't reflect your intellectual ability or your career and earning potential. It is a different issue from your current accommodation problems, but can I suggest you revisit this, think about where your strengths and interests lie and what you need to do to get where you would like to be in 5 or 10 years time? You will find lots of good support on Mumsnet for that too.

I completely understand op. You'll find a lot of property will be holiday homes.
It's the same in north wales, locals priced out due to second home owners and holiday lets.

It's just greed.

Could you get a full time job op?

Me and DP both need to work full time to afford our house...