To be pissed off about where we live?

[Beautifulblue]

Just a rant because I'm just PO tbh. Me (27), partner (28) & 1 daughter who is 1yo. We live (& were born in Brighton) we've made do up until this point with a 1 bed (cheap at 800pcm) but really need 2 bedrooms now DD is getting older.. problem is, we can't afford it. DP works full time, I work part time. Almost all (half decent & I mean HALF) 2 beds are £1200+ where we live. Even places within 5+ miles are the same price. How is this fair? We're being forced out of the town we were born in because of ridiculous rent prices & low wages! I just don't know what we're going to do. Places around 15-20 miles away you can get a 2 bed house for 900pcm & the wages are the same there. But all our family/friends & jobs are here. To top it off estate agents want fees, guarantors & your first born to even consider renting to you. Sick of greedy landlords & tight employers! AIBU to think you should be able to afford to stay in the town you were born in!?

@Beautifulblue I don't know what the children's centres are like in Brighton (I know they've been shut in some areas) but some of the ones around me offer advice to parents on getting the basic qualifications and also run courses with crèche facilities that help people then access college courses. Worth asking at your local one if they still exist.

Similarly approach the local college as they will have information on getting qualifications and what you need to do, and also what funding is available and whether there is childcare support whilst you study.

Yes have a chat with a local college. There should be Access courses which will then get you on to a degree if you want to do one, but I'm not sure how things have changed over the years and what funding there might be. But take heart, a woman I know is just beginning a very good degree at the age of 27 having done very badly at school. The uni snapped her up, telling her she was an outstanding candidate. That was because she knew she'd not done her best at school and is utterly determined to give herself more opportunities now. Talk to anyone you can about this - the OU, your local university. Get all the help you can.

@Beautifulblue speak to your local college. There is so many courses available.
If you prefere distance study, these work with colleges too www.vision2learn.net/courses

Also check out your council website for adult education courses.

You might not have to retake GCSEs.

@gendercritter That's correct. Access to HE. It's also covered by student finance.

Right ok thanks everyone, so can I just walk into any local college & say I would like to further my education how do I go about this? Would the job centre be of any assistance do you think?

www.gbmc.ac.uk/brighton

This would be a good place to start - good luck!

Thanks @happypoobum but those courses are v expensive. I couldn't afford it... one of the negatives of doing things backwards 🙄

Here are some grants and bursaries
www.gov.uk/grant-bursary-adult-learners

Most colleges have payment plans as well.
I think you could also get Advance learner loan from Student finance for level 3 and above. You don't have to start paying it back until you make 25k.
www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.moneyadviceservice.org.uk/en/articles/loans-for-adults-in-further-education-and-training/amp

Any idea what you want to do?

I'm not sure it's classed as priced out when you want a bigger house than you have. It's usual to pay more for a bigger property isn't it

I don’t live too far from you OP (newhaven). Everything is just shockingly expensive. My colleague has a 3 bedroom house, her mortgage is half the price of my rent and I’m only in a 1 bedroom flat. I don’t see how there can be such a difference between rent and mortgage. Obviously I understand that they put a big deposit down for the house so I’m not totally blinded by it but the cost difference is just so dramatic.

Are you in council housing? If so you could look on the Facebook mutual exchange group to see if anyone with a 2 bed would swap for a 1 bed?

@BBALLFUN of course, but we're priced out because we cannot afford a 2 bed. As @Hidillyho just mentioned mortgages tend to be a lot cheaper than rent. Whilst I appreciate landlords are there to make a profit I think sometimes it is just greedy, getting the absolute maximum amount of money they can whilst not even maintaining the property to a decent standard. Turning a 3 bed house into an 8 (very small bed) house & charging 4K a month to students. (Seen this at a Lettings agents just recently) Totally ridiculous!

@OftenHangry I really have no idea. When I initially left school I was hoping to study midwifery & by the grace of god (given my GCSE results) got onto a access course, but of course I messed that up & left. I looked back into that & although an access course is still possible (& potentially funded by the government giving our income) it would then be a minimum of 3 years at uni. Which I know isn't forever, I would be 31,32,33 so still young. But I know that would mean not being able to have another child for potentially 5-6 more years which is a bit of a shitter for me really. I did see a few free courses for my current field (care worker) I do have an NVQ3 in health & social care which has upped my wages a bit but I was considering doing 1 or 2 of these online courses & having a chat to my boss to see if she would increase my wages once they were completed. She's a pretty cool lady & I would think if I explained our situation & she saw I was trying to better myself/better my knowledge of the job she might take pitty & increase it a bit not the dream, but it is a step. & when I was able to go back to work full time I believe I could apply for a managerial role in care with these extra qualifications.
Sorry for the huge ramble.
But can I just add thank you so much for everyone who's taken the time to advise me & send links etc. To take time out of your day to help a total stranger really has made me so grateful. I expected this post to have very few replies so the response has blown me away. Thanks again, knowledgeable ladies of mumsnet

I feel terrible for you OP because I will be one of those DFLs moving to your city taking up another family house. We simply cannot afford a decent family home in Dulwich, and are stuck in a two bed flat, of which we have paid off plenty of the value of the morgage...so for the same price as our shoebox in Dulwich we can get a small house in Patcham, or a slightly bigger one in Falmer. I feel guilty, and I'm sorry.

I have some knowledge internationally of the same problem in Italy. My husband's aunt lives in a village a little way from Frosinone, about an hour's drive from Rome. Recently more and more townies from Rome have bought holiday properties in the village. There isn't much employment in the area and as a result of rich Romans buying up houses, the youngsters are moving to cheaper areas, or out of country, or even to America and the UK! So all the long-established families of old are disappearing.

After my mum and dad married in 1973 they decided to move from Leamington Spa because housing was too expensive and settled in Daventry. They've been there ever since, even though (IMO) it's a dump.

The only people I know who are not moving are those in nice houses in nice local authority estates. They know they have a good thing going.

Don't feel bad @LunaLovegoodsRadishes. It's not families I'm mad at, at all. You're doing what you need to for a decent quality of life to. FYI - We're in Patcham, it's absolutely lovely. So quiet & green but a stones throw from central Brighton. Falmer is not so nice! Everywhere has there 'rougher areas' & having lived here my whole life I recommended you avoid, Falmer, Whitehawk & Moulscoombe! Definitely go for the smaller house in Patcham! 😬

Well, I think you are being slightly unreasonable.

I understand what you are saying re wanting to be where you grew up it, it would be great to be able to live where you want to- it's frustrating to not be able to afford what you'd like (especially when you are asking for a modest home), but having what you want, where you want it really isn't a right.

I also agree that rents in the SE are very high (think it's madness, personally) and this makes it hard for those on low incomes. However, it is always about supply vs demand- and what the market will bear. There must be sufficient people who want to live in Brighton and can afford to pay those rents, or the rents would be lowered. The state could do more to provide affordable homes, but essentially this is about cutting your cloth according to your means. Your means are limited, so you need to find a way to make the best of it.

You do have choices- none will give you exactly what you want (or at least not immediately), but nonetheless they are choices.

You could:
a) move further out from your ideal area (you said 10 miles or so) to afford what you want. The compromise here is the commute/cost of commute/not being where you want to be and further from family.
b) stay in your preferred area but accept you'll have to be in a smaller/less suitable property. the compromise here is the size of property but you don't have commuting issues/costs and are where you like to be and are close to your family.
c) one or both of you take on some form of education or training so that you can improve your earning capacity and in time can perhaps afford what you want, where you want it. The compromise is having to stay put (or choose option a whilst doing this and looking to move back later) and waiting, also having to put in extra work which will be hard whilst working/having a young child- but is probably doable. E.g. distance learning/OU or night classes)
d)investigate moving somewhere further away with lower house prices/rental costs- if you can both be sure of getting work. You may be able to achieve a better standard of living but the compromise is being further away from family/friends/Brighton- you may find your prefer where you end up, or you may not.

Ultimately, you and DP have to find the compromise which works best for you.

I saw someone recommended childrens centres - Hollingdean childrens centre is very active and I think run adult courses too.

Thanks for confirming that @Camomila that is the only 1 I know of, presume it's my local as we were sent there when DD was born for an appointment. So I was going to pop up there & see what they have on offer.

One of my relatives qualified as a midwife a couple of years ago and had a baby in the middle of it - she took nine months maternity leave and continued to get a bursary paid for the whole time. Her husband did the same thing with a nursing qualification - he was exempted from night shifts whilst his children were under two.

Wow that's really interesting to know @RidingMyBike thank you. Can I ask what is a Bursary? is it some form of income whilst you're training?

@Beautifulblue sounds like a plan. Go for it. I am in early 30s and just finished acces and about to start uni
Check this out as well
nationalcareersservice.direct.gov.uk

How have you found it @OftenHangry? What course did you do & for how long? How long will you be at uni for? Do you have DC & work? Sorry million questions...

well I am from London and cant afford to live there..it's a pain.
You could apply for a council flat though couldn't you?
Your local roots might help..(altho frankly I doubt it).

@Beautifulblue sadly the govt seems to have stopped offering bursaries for midwifery/nursing since last year www.gov.uk/nhs-bursaries/eligibility

However, there are sometimes bursaries or other support available from the university itself.

This guide is helpful about funding study at university
www.moneysavingexpert.com/students/student-loans-tuition-fees-changes/

@RidingMyBike that's such a shame, but not totally shocked tbh thanks for the link - really informative. I'm presuming the student loan also covers living costs? That would be essential considering my DD... & that the midwifery course is full time for 3 years. It would be impossible to have a job around that to pay for everything? I plan on making an appointment with my job centre tomorrow to discuss my options I have found an online access course which seems to suggest the government may fund it www.stonebridge.uk.com/19-plus-courses if not there is an option to pay monthly instalments of £65 & I could complete the course in 6-18months. It's achieveable but I am nervous!!

I've done one year access will be at uni for 3 years. No kids, but FT job.
The loan you would get for access gets wiped off when you finish uni.
I am not sure you can get maintenance loan with Advanced learner loan, but you can for uni time.

Tbh I am not sure if job centre helps, but these could
www.brighton-hove.gov.uk/event/careers-advice-jubilee-library