Not sharing recipes

[ThreeHousesNoHouse]

Aibu to find it annoying and childish when people don’t share recipes. As if it makes them special to be the only one who can make a dish.

Even giving a general direction is fair enough e.g. the chicken has paprika and cumin or ‘I put beetroot in the chocolate cake but it’s a family secret recipe so I won’t go into detail’ is fine.

My mil once told me the recipe for dh’s favourite stew she made ‘is somewhere on the internet maybe’ eyeroll.
At least own it and say ‘I want to be the only one able to make his favourite dish’.

It’s more weird when vague acquaintances won’t share. E.g. church bring and share, but won’t share the recipe.

If I make the cake at the next bring and share we will all know it’s Gladys’ recipe. If I make it at the school cake sale how will that affect Gladys?

You never know, some of these 'secret recipes' might contain a 'special ingredient' such as a jar of sauce or a tin of soup!

Ha ha Bluetrews!! My thoughts exactly! Either people are being precious or something is put of a packet!

"out of a packet" sorry

My cousin’s rice pudding... drool and I don’t even like rice pudding usually. Asked her for the recipe many times and she says she will give it to her daughter when she dies. So I asked her daughter (who’s 40 odds) if she would pass it on to me and she said No. So annoying.

I do pass on recipes but sometimes fib about the amount of butter which makes it so delish.

I don’t think highly of people who won’t share recipes. I think it’s a bit precious. I always share.

I have a journal type book where I write down people’s recipes. It’s nice to go through it and think fondly of friends who shared. Eileen’s Cheesecake, Joan’s Hawaiian chicken, etc.

Why are people so precious about it? Is it a power thing? Weird.

Unless you're guarding the recipe for Coca-Cola or something, you're being ridiculously precious.

I have always found people flattered and willing to share, I must have been lucky. Like PPs I have a notebook that I’ve put various recipes into and I like making them and remembering that it’s Erin’s shortbread, mum’s rock buns, Jackie’s 8 layer bean dip etc. They remind me of friends and places in my life.
I’ve given out my chocolate brownie recipe umpteen times - it’s a link the the BBC good food website! It’s still nice when you know it’s a tried and tested one though.

I am will to share my fav recipe , its been handed down in the family for many many years ,
here goes

-goes to cupboard to find scrap of paper with the ingredients on-
( to be read in hushed tones of awe and wonder )

take one very large container and fill with hot water add a few drops of vanilla or peppermint essence .
in another smaller container , preferably glass , pour some fermented grape juice, for safety firmly push the metal locking system into place , best enjoyed alone or with a good book .

AKA - run a hot bath put some nice smellys in it pour yourself a glass of wine and lock the door .
defiantly one of my fav recipes

@marylou1977 MIL does this and has little stories behind each one and the person who passed them to her, I think it's a lovely thing to do. She loves nothing more than people appreciating her food and happily shares recipes and advises little ways of adapting them to different tastes.

I've got a copy of a lovely community cookbook made by a synagogue as a sort of memorial. They described how the Holocaust broke the chain of continuity both down and across generations, creating a lack of family traditions in subsequent generations.

The cookbook was a way of re-establishing family traditions and history. Every recipe is called something like Auntie Rosa's Sponge Cake, or Michael's Salad, and is accompanied by a little story about the dish, or the person who it is named for, or the relationship between the contributor of the recipe and its creator. Some of the recipes are family traditions that survived the Holocaust, others were created by the contributors and have become part of their family traditions.

It's a marvellous book, both for the recipes and the stories.

Food is enhanced by sharing.

At my work there was a "secret" recipe for truffles that one lady always brought to bake sales, and everyone loved them. One day she admitted they were smashed up Oreos mixed with Philadelphia, rolled into balls and dipped in melted chocolate! They did taste good, though- not like real truffles of course but good.

My mum asked a distant American relative for their cookie recipe as they were so tasty. She said no. Basically she'd had to wait for someone else to die before she was allowed the recipe and she wasn't allowed to share it.

If I'm making cakes for a lot of people e.g. For the office, if it's a particularly special or unusual cake I will print out the recipe a few times so people can take a copy. Also eases my fears of unknowingly serving up anything people are allergic to.

Sharing is caring! :)

When I lived in a village in East Germany, everyone (including nearby villages, etc) had been asked to contribute a family recipe in their own handwriting. These were then scanned and it was made into a book, which was then sold.
Any profits went to the local villages. It's one of my favourite memories from living there, and I still use the recipe book.

I love baking/cooking and often don't follow recipes properly (always substituting, tweaking, etc). I'm always flattered when someone wants my recipe for something and I always oblige.
I'm also trying to collate a family recipe book that I hope my children will want to use (and add to) when I'm dead and gone.

I think there's an episode of Friends where Phoebe wants her grandma's cookie recipe, which turns out to be one of those packets eg Aunt Bessie or whatever.

My Mum, sister and I all have the same recipe for a pork casserole. But we all make it differently. Good cooks or bakers tweak recipes without even realising we're doing it. A friend asked me for a recipe so I got out the cookbook it came from to copy it out for her and realised I'd changed it over the years without even realising.

episode of Friends where Phoebe wants her grandma's cookie recipe, which turns out to be one of those packets eg Aunt Bessie or whatever.

Nestle Toll House cookies :) Didn't Phoebe mis-remember it as Toulouse or something?

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A friend has a WI West Yorkshire book from the 1970s. It's interesting to read tho' it would be guesswork making some of the recipes now as we no longer have bleached flour so there are some differences. One of my favourite instructions is for a fruit cake:, "Don't even think of cutting into this cake before 6 months" (or words to that effect).

Another friend has a booklet about using up stale bread - from the 1950s. And it is entertainingly grim - the breadcrumb muffins (the English muffin sort, not the sweet sort) sound spectacularly bland.

Lol, the Friends episode! "She got it from Nestle Toulouse."
Monica - Nestle Toll House?!
Phoebe "Yes! This is it! Oh."
"And it's reasons like this you are BURNING IN HELL!"

Also reminds me of Bree in Desperate Housewives where she breaks into Katherine's house to steal her dessert recipe.
Seriously, why are people so weird about recipes?! How is this even a thing?! Give it to me or don't, I don't care. I was probably only being polite in the first place!

It's a really weird attitude and people who don't share a recipe are killing it. All it will take is your children not to have children and the recipe is gone.

It would be like writing a briliant song and only ever singing it to family!
Really odd.

A better way to honour the familiness off it is to title it "Aunt Bessie Johnson's Crumble " on the print out you give to your friend so that everyone will know who created it.

It's super Hyacinth Bucket stuff to be all secretive. Reminds me of little kids putting their arm round their colouring so no one can see it.

My mum was very miffed that my nan shared her recipe for fruit cake with me, but told my mum she didn't have a recipe and just chucked stuff in till it looked right. Not true at all. However I have shared the recipe with my mum, we have just agreed not to tell my nan.

I have a secret recipe for chocolate brownies. They have won competitions.

You take a box of betty crocker brownie mix, you make them up according to the instructions then bake them. They are better than any other brownies. (Actually an ex's mum made some epic brownies, they had to be kept in the fridge as they were so gooey. She emailed the recipe to me because she is a good person -but they wouldn't be good for my diet!)

So I asked her daughter (who’s 40 odds) if she would pass it on to me and she said No. So annoying.... I do pass on recipes but sometimes fib about the amount of butter which makes it so delish.

So you find it annoying, but you also like the power of being the only one who can make the special delicious thing, so you do it too?