To ask if it's futile trying to stop a 7.5 year old boy showing off and being silly?

[Pushpins40]

Exactly that. He'll try to be the real clown, the silly one - sometimes it's good natured, other times (like today in a changing room with two other kids, a girl and a boy that he's doing a swimming class with) he starts shouting, 'I can see you vagina and your penis!'.

It's embarrassing and very annoying. If it's not that sort of stuff, it's just generally trying to push boundaries, be the funny one.

How do I stop it? Can I? Am I being realistic given his age? He
We talk to him about it and I think he 'hears' but then, in the moment, of course he does exactly the same.

FunintheSun that's exactly what I meant. Inbetween the shit finger pointing there is actually some good advice.

I personally wouldn't be taking away TV etc but I'd give the mum glare alright, but more important than any of that is to teach him why it's not on, how to behave respectfully and self control around these things. Not you don't say it because you'll get your tech taken. I find this effective and less stressful. Talk to him, explain, put him in other's position etc. He'll get there op. Time is all.

Some really poor reading comprehension in evidence on this thread. OP isn't posting because she thinks her son's behaviour is amusing or acceptable, she's asking for advice on how to stop it. Some people have made proper twats of themselves in their desperate, frothing haste to condemn her and her small boy. I wonder why?

I wish I knew the answer OP. My DS is the same age, awaiting assessment for ASD and ADHD, and constantly rattles on about willies, bums, poo and the like. And yes, I am mortified, and yes, he does face consequences. He gets removed as quickly as possible but there are times when he is so giddy that no punishment seems to matter in that moment. The only thing I can do is keep him away from everyone else until he calms down. When he is calm he is full of remorse and resolves to be better behaved. Like the OP's son, his behaviour at school is very good.

I don't know whether it's down to his likely neuro-developmental conditions, general immaturity or shit parenting. DH and I are on him all the time, and our other child has no similar problems knowing how to behave appropriately in public, despite being younger. Like BertieBotts, a part of me hopes it is our parenting, then we could "fix" things. Whereas if he does have ASD and/or ADHD he may struggle all his life with social skills.

OP, you clearly want better for your son and you are a good mother

Not futile, imperative.

His behaviour was that of a bully. The other children could have felt humiliated. Words like that can have a damaging impact, as other posters have described.

I agree with PPS, consequences for your 7 year old. Not just 'harsh words'. Words are a form of attention. If attention is his currency, then use that. If he carries on like this, he sits alone/sent to room/waits in the car etc.

Silverbirchtree His behaviour was that of a bully.

What an absolute crock of shit. Really. He is the least bullish boy you'll ever meet.

God, how easy it is for some of you to lob these outlandish statements when you're behind a veil of anonymity!

I really doubt the people who have made horrible comments about a little boy would have been that vicious about a girl.
He’s been called a little twat, a little tosser and someone even said they would have slapped him. Are there really women like this in real life? If so I feel very inclined to protect my sons from whatever daughters they are bringing up!

Justanotherposter no, I am not a sock puppet. Just a person with a different view, who thought that many of the comments aimed at BossWitch were out of order.

The reason I posted is that I worry about the aggression that is expressed towards teachers on many threads, particularly when teachers are leaving the profession in worrying numbers and when antagonism from parents is often cited as a contributory factor.

Justanotherposter - you're kidding, right? You MUST be writing tongue in cheek, surely?

worry about the aggression that is expressed towards teachers on many threads, particularly when teachers are leaving the profession in worrying numbers and when antagonism from parents is often cited as a contributory factor.

Bosswitch was the most aggressive, nasty poster on this thread. She doesn't deserve any defence.

Shrug it off and ignore it. The more attention you give him the more he will do it. Sounds like any attention is good attention as far as he is concerned.
Refreshing that he knows the correct anatomical names tbh instead of the usual nonsense.

This is good if you do think it's an attention thing www.janetlansbury.com/2018/03/child-seems-stuck-seeking-negative-attention/

I'm probably a lot older than you guys, but if a boy had shouted that at my daughter he would have got a sharp slap from me and an furious 'how dare you'.

No you wouldn't . You'd have checked to see what the Mum was like and sized her up before saying anything. The most you'd have done is have told him off and you wouldn't even have done that if Mum looked like she might go for you if you did.

The reason I posted is that I worry about the aggression that is expressed towards teachers on many threads, particularly when teachers are leaving the profession in worrying numbers and when antagonism from parents is often cited as a contributory factor.

I have a lot of respect for teachers but nobody needs a teacher like her. It’s in very poor taste that she teaches young people and uses such vicious terminology to refer to a little boy. She’s around young people all the time and the hate must be bubbling inside her all day when she’s at work. I’m actually glad she doesn’t teach little children as that would just be even worse.

His behavior is not that of a bully, a bully sets out to make others feel bad, this dc was carried away with silly behavior that he thought was funny. Yes he needs to understand that it isn't okay and OP needs to find a management strategy she is happy with but getting carried away with throwing insults isn't going to help.

Why the assumption that BossWitch hates all children, funinthesun?

The hate must be bubbling inside her all day when she’s at work . Have a word with yourself, you nitwit.

Bloody hell it's like #metoo never happened.

I guess I'm just appalled that he wasn't dealt with more harshly and that the original OP was so blasé without a thought to how that poor little girl's privacy was invaded and humiliated.

Fact of the matter is that some boys do grow up to carry on teasing/harassing girls throughout puberty and beyond. But of course, none of your boys oh no. They must be transported from outer space!

Goatwoman- I agree with you entirely. And I’d be happy to have a mum who would stick up for me after a boy made such a disgusting comment like that and made me no doubt feel upset/violated. The rest of you on here are apologists for his disgusting language and I wouldn’t feel considered if I was a daughter of yours.

OP if your son can’t use a changing room appropriately at 7 then you should have removed him entirely. His behavior and language was vile.

What, because people object to grown women sharply slapping 7 year old children?

Bloody hell it's like #metoo never happened.

Oh my god, i have to leave this thread. Are you seriously, really, bringing Metoo, into this Goat?

Get a grip, woman. Honestly. What a joke of a post.

Why the assumption that BossWitch hates all children, funinthesun?

Didn’t say all children, but she clearly has a problem with boys. Maybe she could go and work in all girl’s school?

Fact of the matter is that some boys do grow up to carry on teasing/harassing girls throughout puberty and beyond. But of course, none of your boys oh no. They must be transported from outer space!

SOME boys yes. The ones who arent taught boundaries properly. But then that can happen with both girls and boys. What makes you think the op’s son is going to turn out like that? The op clearly doesn’t intend on letting him do it again! She hasn’t shrugged it off and had a laugh about it. You should be ashamed of yourself for what you said about slapping a child. If anyone is teaching their child bad habits it’s you by condoning violence around your daughter.

I find it quite useful when posters openly project adult sexual motives on to very young children. It helps me to know who to steer well clear of!

Op they’re just sad and pathetic. Don’t let them make you doubt yourself. You’ve fully acknowledged that it was innapropriate. But now that we’re associating 7 year old boys with the MeToo campaign I really don’t think whatever you say will make any difference.

You seem to have changed the script, op?

You originally said he called out “I can see your vagina/penis”, that’s a whole different ballgame from “you have a vagina/penis” (although the latter sounds like something a two year old would say, did he imagine they hadn’t noticed what genitals they’d been blessed with?)

Umm because he hasn't been taught boundaries! Even after this incident.

I apologise for the slapping comment, it was a visceral reaction to the tedious shit that girls/women are forced to tolerate their whole lives.

And actually, if this behaviour carried on he would very much find himself on the receiving end of trouble/punishment. A boy from my DD's school thought it was hilarious to go round grabbing the developing breasts of his fellow 10 year old female year group. He did get a whalloping from an older brother... I can't really find a problem with that.