To have turned back

[Stopplayingwiththecheese]

DB is having a barbecue today, he lives an hour and a quarter away. We have a dog who we don't like to leave for more than four hours or so and can't take him there.

We set off with the intention of staying for an hour and a half. We'd bought cake, meat and booze to take. Traffic was horrendous and after an hour sat nav was still telling us we were over an hour away, so we turned back. If we'd carried on we would have been able to spend about 15 minutes assuming it had really taken the hour, also traffic was even worse going the other way. So we turned back, I texted DB to explain and apologise and got a load of abuse back. WIBU to come home? Should we have gone, said hi and left?!

Good for you op for making the sensible decision on the spot.If you'd turned up and not stayed long you'd probably still have been moaned at.as you said,you normally get a dog sitter but on this occasion you couldnt.dogs are a big commitment and you acted responsibly and nobody should abuse you for that.
Explain again to your db ,now he's had time to calm down he will hopefully see you had little choice in this situation.I expect your dog🐕was delighted to see you all too☺

Yanbu op. Judging by some of the replies on here, I can now see why so many pets end up in rescue centres. People really don't get it do they?

You sound like a really responsible dog owner - shame there aren't more like you.

@Stopplayingwiththecheese

Just want to be really clear here. You were not being rude or unreasonable.

I find these threads so depressing- the UK is meant to be a 'nation of animal lovers' (though I hate that phrase as we're clearly not) and yet there are so many people here who think that dogs are basically just toys to be left whenever it suits?

You understand the needs of your dog. The responsibility of caring for a animal will ALWAYS trump a BBQ or whatever. Your DB is entitled to ban dogs from his property if he really believes them to be so awful, but he is not entitled to be abusive to you when your responsibilities don't suit him.

Human parties do not trump animal welfare. Elderly dogs need to be let out to go to the toilet, and even aside from that can get confused and distressed. Many would be fine for that long, but many wouldn't. OP is perfectly entitled (and required) to meet the needs of her dog.

DB sounds more like Dick Brother.

THEY are being U not to welcome your dog
Ridiculous, no dogs are welcome at my house because it would really upset my cats. I’m not going to freak out my pets to accommodate someone else’s.

I am concerned by how many people’s dogs have separation anxiety! Surely you want your dog to be fine when you leave? Otherwise how do you shower or go to the supermarket? I don’t think it’s right when people get pets and work all day every day away from home as 8 hours a day or so is bullshit, and I wouldn’t have bought a dog If I weren’t home all week, but goodness me I occasionally have to leave him for 5 hours or so and he absolutely fine - I have a nestcam installed and can see that all he does is sleep, as at night time. I love my dog to pieces but they are not people and need not be anthropomorphised in order to be loved and appreciated, they ought to be fine alone sometimes.

Brother out of line to abuse you though!

For the future maybe find a teenager who loves animals and who would be happy to come and chill on your safa, watch TV, eat your biscuits and let the dog out, take the dog for a small walk etc. and be happy to receive a tenner for their time.
I'm sure you'd have had enough notice to find one.

I wouldn't go all that way just for an hour. More sense to make a day of it. Would he really mind if you asked to bring the dog ? Or a nice bit of exercise for the dog before you set off and he would be fine for a good few hours on his own.

@crispysausagerolls I don't understand your post, nobody is complaining about dogs being left for 4 hours, people are talking about leaving them for the whole day. Also, who are all these people that you've mentioned with dogs who have separation anxiety?

My grandmother is like that, but 5 hours. Drives us all bonkers too.

crazycatgal

The whole post is about OP who returned home as she didn’t want to leave her dog for more than 4 hours.

Several people on the thread mention their dogs having separation anxiety. I would really rather not scroll back to list names individually.

People who won’t do things because of their dogs really grind my gears. It. Is. A. Dog.
You were undoubtedly rude. But your brother sounds like a knob in his response so I wouldn’t lose any sleep over it!

@crispysausagerolls Yes but OP said she is fine leaving the dog for 4 hours, so obviously she can go to the supermarket etc. She didn't want to leave the dog alone for an extended period which is the right thing to do.

A couple of people mentioned that their dogs have separation anxiety, that is nothing to be concerned about.

People who won’t do things because of their dogs really grind my gears. It. Is. A. Dog.

Correct, it's a dog- you know, a living creature with needs that is entirely reliant upon you, somewhat like a baby. It's not an object.

Although to be honest why that should be a problem to you is beyond me- presumably they're not asking you to look after it. They just won't do what you want to do with them. Not sure why you should get so wound up about what they chose to do with their lives.

I can't leave our dog home alone for more than 20 minutes or so. He starts to whine then howl, as attested by my lovely non-complaining neighbour!
Of course I've done all the recommended separation anxiety relief training, and he is better than he was (used to start the second I was out of sight), but no way would I leave him stressed and inflict my neighborhood with his crying.