To be not looking forward to NYC holiday

[Kakamora]

Because of a post I’ve just seen about servers complaining they’ve had a tip that doesn’t reflect what they spent on food.

Yes I know that tips top up their wages but I want to take my mum on some pretty fancy dinners while we’re there and just because I spend $100 dollars which I’ve saved up my minimum wage money for, I don’t see why some server thinks that’s entitles he to a $20 tip because I’m spending a lot of money.

It is annoying me thinking I will have to save around an additional £150 for tip money. I always tip, but I don’t think waitresses here in the U.K. (which I am part time, think that spending £100 you know people have budgeted for warrants an expensive tip

What ever you think it's going to cost - double it

This! It's good advice no matter what but NYC is one of the most expensive cities in the world and the pound is not likely to recover any time soon.

Doesn't sound like you really ventured outside the cities.

That's true Stupofox

Wow! Do people really get chased down for a tip? My dd Dad is American I can honestly say I have never seen this happen. Maybe it’s because we do tip, but surely if you pay at the end and walk out it would be hard to catch you in a busy street. Seems mad.

I tip taxis etc but it does get confusing. There was an out door suitcase check in at the airport once. I am sure he expected a tip.

Also I hate anyone in my room when on holidays so don’t tip house keeping.

If you aren't going to tip, don't go back to the same restaurant a second time. Stiffing the people who have control over what goes into your food is not a smart move.

I agree that waitstaff minimum wage in the US needs to change, but until it does not tipping is a shit move. If you know your server is probably paid around $3 per hour and you still don't tip you are a shit and you should feel bad.

I never tip 20% in the UK, 10% at most.

I leave $1 per person per day for housekeeping on holiday, although I must admit we didn't when we stayed a couple of nights and had no plans to go back. I've never tipped in a hotel at home, it's never occurred to me to do that.

That's true Stupofox

Oooh I like that as a new username :-)

Sorry, I realise I never actually finished my post. I meant to say I agree - I don't really like those cities either. I like a lot of the smaller ones, but I find the big ones too touristy and overwhelming. I love a lot of the countryside and small towns. And some parts of the country are just offensive (Orlando, I'm looking at you).

In my experience 15-20% is the norm for good service. More for a very good experience, less if it was so-so. If you tip less expect to explain why. For the most part they work hard to ensure you have a good meal (and by default ‘earn’ their tip) so respect the local protocols.

Oooh I like that as a new username :-)

Haha, sorry about that, I have the memory of a goldfish!

Sorry, I realise I never actually finished my post. I meant to say I agree - I don't really like those cities either. I like a lot of the smaller ones, but I find the big ones too touristy and overwhelming. I love a lot of the countryside and small towns. And some parts of the country are just offensive (Orlando, I'm looking at you).

I completely agree, I much prefer small towns and the countryside. I wonder if it's a reaction to living in London. My DH insists LA was 'amazing' and I just look at him like he's an alien when he says this.

I hated Orlando too!

Chased down by waiter in Rome.

I am a good tipper, often going way beyond 20% for excellent service. On road trip in Italy, with a native Italian(!) he claimed loudly and often "No tippee in Italia" - We kept asking - and it took us about two weeks to believe him. Last night of the trip, in Rome. We left the restaurant and were dithering about which direction for the metro, when our waiter emerged. Lit a cigarette and said something in rapid (and angry) Italian to our friend. Who then looked with a shocked expression at DH and said loudly "What friend, no tippee?" We all three started rummaging for ridiculous amounts of euros for the tip. Probably gave him 50% in the end. Bloody friend has not yet lived down throwing us under the bus that way :)

I wish the Americans would pay proper wages and cover it in the pricing, nothing worse than waiters fawning all over you, pretending to be your best mate

I do wonder sometimes at the places tourists from the UK choose to visit in the States. I grew up there and never had the desire to go to LA. Then again, I wouldn’t describe any of the places I’ve visited in the UK as “offensive” either.

But sometimes people do save for a long time for these types of holidays and are on a strict budget spending money wise.

Well yes, Storm4Star. That's why when you budget for a holiday you have to take account of everything. You wouldn't take a taxi and then when it came to pay the taxi fare at the end say "I can't afford the fare, but my children needed to travel here so I thought I'd take the taxi anyway, sorry". You wouldn't order ice-creams at a stand, and then, after they are handed over to your kids say "I can't afford to pay for them but I thought my kids deserved ice-cream".

Tips are part-payment for the service you receive. If you don't tip, then you aren't paying properly for the service you are expecting to receive.

In some states there actually is a more sensible minimum wage for wait staff. In mine, the minimum wage is $10 per hour for non-tipped staff, and wait staff are paid a minimum of $5 an hour, but if they don't also receive $5 per hour in tips then the restaurant pays them the difference.

It's complicated.

@ArcheryAnnie

I wouldn’t agree with that because only in the States is a tip classed as part of your wage and taxed as such, I have never heard of that being the case elsewhere. Yes sometimes people do “rely” on tips but it’s not their wages.

Then again, I wouldn’t describe any of the places I’ve visited in the UK as “offensive” either

Not even Reading?

My son is currently a waiter in NYC, in Manhattan. He’s 21 and trying to save some money for college. Have you any idea how much it costs to live in NYC? Rent, travel, food. Everything is expensive. He has to tip too if he eats out you know! He lives an hour from work on the subway due to rent costs so an 8 hour shift is closer to 11 with commute and clearing up. As so many others have said his hourly rate is crap. In an expensive restaurant people tend to stay longer so fewer covers/shift. If everyone had your attitude he wouldn’t be able to afford to live. If you don’t like the system stay at home but don’t penalize those working hard to serve you!

Sorry but tipping is optional. Morally you should tip in the US. Legally, it’s not a requirement, therefore “optional”. When I didn’t give a tip in that lousy restaurant, yeah they were pissed off but no police were called! It wasn’t an arrestable offence like it would have been had I tried to skip out on the bill. A moral obligation is not a legal one!

Another reason I prefer Japan though, tipping is actively frowned upon there and staff are insulted if you try to tip! Although sometimes I would really like to and feel bad I can’t!

I like the way it is in Japan, just takes it all out of the equation.

However, it is customary to tip 20% in the US and NYC is very expensive in general (here at the mo). I don’t think the service is any better, I find it all so false...Horrid system but as it’s the custom here, I do it..

Yeah that very system is one of the reasons I wouldn’t want to go back. I think it’s disgusting that staff aren’t paid a proper wage and to tax them on tips they “should” be getting, but might not be is even worse! A truly horrible system. But honestly, maybe if everyone stopped tipping then they would have to be paid a decent wage. This culture only thrives because people keep it going.

www.escape.com.au/world/north-america/tipping-in-new-york-city-7-best-nyc-restaurants-where-you-dont-have-to-tip/news-story/c4e1e296da705ff6959199b960c2b228
Sorry. Not the best link but some non tipping restaurants. Can highly recommend the gramercy tavern.
Don't go to other restaurants and fail to leave a tip. That makes you a twat

You should factor in the cost of a tip when travelling to cities when tipping us the norm.
You may not agree with it, but by not tipping you’re not sticking it to the system, just the poor server on $2 an hour.
I agree it’s an unfair system but it’s part of the culture. You don’t have to tip, but you will probably be asked why you didn’t like the service.

I wish I had been asked why I didn’t like the service in that lousy place as I would have been more than happy to tell them! I’m sorry but if the food is basically inedible and you speak to a staff member about it you don’t expect to just get a shrug in return. There were places I did tip while there as the food was decent, as was the service. But I am certainly not going to tip for inedible food and a shrug!

maybe if everyone stopped tipping then they would have to be paid a decent wage

Maybe they would, but I'm not convinced even that would change things. IME tipping is so ingrained in American culture that they'd probably still add more and, since nobody's likely to refuse extra money, the whole rigmarole would start again

It's the same with cruising, which I'm pretty keen on. Even with the frequent deals where tips are included they'll still do it - often upfront before any service has been received - which creates an expectation from everyone else

As I've said, I tip and don't mind it at all ... but what I DO mind is being made a mug of

Refusing to tip on principle is not the right way to go about it. All you do is hurt the little guy, and you won't change anything. If you're that bothered about tipping culture, lobby your local politician(s) to introduce new laws on the issue.

My daughter works as a server in a sports bar. She is 22 and has a degree. She makes $2.45 an hour. She is taxed on much higher. It is assumed her tips make up minimum wage, which in this state is $11 an hour I believe. Servers take a whole load of shit and crap from people and have to smile and take it, if they want to make enough money to cover the tax bill each year.
No it doesnt take any more effort to carry a steak than a burger but you would get the same level of attention for a burger as a steak . Its how these people survive and support their families.
Servers are well under appreciated and often treated like crap. If thats how you feel about tipping and screwing with some ones livelihood, stay home or eat at subway.
Most of these servers couldnt dream of taking a trans atlantic vacation, too busy staying alive, paying health care, day care, rent etc
Most work 2 or 3 jobs just to make ends meet, or are paying their way through school.
Dont stiff them. Your minimum wage job is way more than their server pay and still got you a trans atlantc vacation. SUCK IT UP AND TIP them or keep your tight arse at home