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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think this was an overreaction by teacher

304 replies

Lydiaatthebarre · 09/08/2018 08:39

One of my Friend's is a teacher and was supposed to be away for a few days. I was surprised to bump into her yesterday and she rolled her eyes and said two kids from her class had turned up at the same hotel so she insisted to her husband that they leave.

She said she wouldn't be able to relax, use the hotel swimming pool and changing room, have a drink etc without looking over her shoulder, and neither did she want parents coming over to talk about their kid's progress while she was on holidays.

Would most teachers feel like this or was that an over reaction?

OP posts:
serbska · 09/08/2018 12:11

I once got snap chatted by a year 11 eating a McDonald’s in Trafford centre, and they replaced my big mac with a cock

fucking hell I hope you managed to go radio mental and get the police involved for revenge porn or something?

SimonBridges · 09/08/2018 12:12

What is making me laugh is the amount of end of term present suggestions that are ‘a bottle of wine’ and then parents reporting teachers to governors because they were drinking!

I have bumped into parents while sticking gin bottles in the bottle bank.
While shopping in the supermarket when my basket contained not only Canesten but cystitis treatment too.

But nothing beats me friend who had a parent perform a very intimate examination at the GU clinic.

IHopeYouStepOnALegoPiece · 09/08/2018 12:12

I’m a nanny and have done (and still do) a lot of odd days here and there for a lot of families in the same area and I absolutely dread bumping into them when I’m out for a drink or dinner. They always send the kids over to chat to me, or comment on my drinks (I was working the next day for someone I bumped into at dinner and she text me from her table to say “hope those are virgin cocktails. It’s a busy day tomorrow and I don’t want you hungover.”
I’m 30 years old! I don’t need policing. You either trust me or you don’t! (As it happened I had 2 alcoholic and 2 virgin...not that it was any of her business!)
Let me enjoy my dinner in peace! I want to drink 27 passionfruit daiquiris and 41 plates of tapas now leave me be!!! (In the nicest possible way...).

Mind you, It was nice when I was out for dinner with a friend and my ex bosses came in with the kids, we had a hug and brief chat then they purposely got themselves seated far away then took care of our bill!

Sunnybeachbabe · 09/08/2018 12:16

*I'd feel the same as a parent but I wouldn't leave. What made her think they'd be asking about their child's progress, I'm sure they'd rather just keep out of her way.

@TrickyKid
*
You'd be surprised at what some parents find appropriate though. I'm the same as you, if I met my child's teacher I'd nod politely and avoid them. Not all parents feel that way though and a select few find their kids so adorable that they think their teachers will be delighted to spend the holiday with them.

Notmany · 09/08/2018 12:38

Secondary school? It's a vicious place and I don't blame any teacher wanting to keep their private life private from their students.

GhoulWithADragonTattoo · 09/08/2018 12:47

I once saw my English teacher and the HT at a London station together. They were not a couple and he was married to someone else!ShockBlush

Nononannette · 09/08/2018 12:56

Unless their body language suggested otherwise, there are loads of reasons why two teachers might be at a station together. I've been sent to a hotel with one other married colleague - part of a conference we were chosen to attend. Though the secret affair is sadly also a possibility!

YeTalkShiteHen · 09/08/2018 12:56

I ended up on the same hen night as DS1s last class teacher, we made a deal never to talk about that night with anyone who wasn’t there. Job done Smile

seven201 · 09/08/2018 13:04

I wouldn't leave but I'd be secretly very pissed off! If the child tried to talk to me regularly I'd politely explain that I'm on holiday so they need to leave me alone!

It's annoying enough on a Monday at school where you get the "Mrs seven, were you in Sainsburys car park with a man at 2pm? And Sarah said she saw you with your dd in the swimming pool on Sunday. A few weeks ago I saw you in Wagamama too; you looked a bit annoyed but ate all of your food."

chocatoo · 09/08/2018 13:18

Is it not a little rude to ignore completely? Surely a brief token acknowledgement followed by careful keeping of distance is more appropriate?

JumblieGirl · 09/08/2018 13:20

Got dropped off near school a couple of times by an attractive man in a very flash car, who gave me a kiss and a hug before roaring off. Let that one run a few weeks before owning up that he was my brother. Gave the parental gossiping geese something to hiss about.
I’m always surprised by the sheer nosiness and fabrications that can arise in school.

categed · 09/08/2018 13:20

Read this, yes it the daily fail however this is what teachers can face out of work.
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1389292/Disgrace-drinking-pole-dancing-primary-school-teachers-published-pictures-Facebook.html

This is shown to us at the august inset with a reminder to either not use social media ot to make sure everything is locked down or untraceable. Also to not let friends post pics (apparently case above). We are told that one teacher was sacked for the pics as it broke prof conduct rules and the rest were given a warning.
I've known collegues to have facebook hate posts regarding their health and conplaints made due to what they do out of school.
It's mad how the prof conduct rules apply 24/7 but thems the rules of the job so if we want to keep it we follow them.
There is only 1 child i would possible ever leave a holiday over and that would be more to do with my children's safety rather than my own issues. So no not unreasonable to leave.

Pengggwn · 09/08/2018 13:31

chocatoo

Of course it's rude to ignore people (unless they have a track record of being offensive to you). Therefore, speaking to them is an obligation. I don't go on holiday tonne under obligation, I go to please myself. That's why I would leave, if I could.

EnormousDormouse · 09/08/2018 13:33

This is the reason I have started going long haul, adults only, all inclusive for my 'main' summer hols Grin

But I teach abroad and there are only a few resorts within easy travelling distance so I am very used to hearing 'Mrs Dormouse' ! shouted across the pool by children from my school. One morning after quite a boozy event I was greeted at breakfast by 3 different families whose kids I'd taught.

Youaremyfavourite · 09/08/2018 13:55

This reply has been withdrawn

This message has been withdrawn at the poster's request

WowLookAtYou · 09/08/2018 16:12

Every single September without fail, one or other of my colleagues will report that they saw one of our kids whilst away on holiday.

The worst for me was a large group of my Yr 6 boys at the local pool when I was heavily pregnant at antenatal swimming. I swam bloody miles at the end of the session rather than get out in front of them.

BoneyBackJefferson · 09/08/2018 16:23

TheLadyArmitage
Surely you would just grow a thicker skin and move on / ignore? hmm

A lovely teacher at a school I worked in was photographed in a bikini with her friends, by the time she got back to school pretty much all of the boys had a copy of it and a fair few of the girls as well. .

During the next term it appeared on fake websites, pupils webpages, other pupils phones, on several occasions on various interactive white boards around the school (they read from flash memory cards), on A4 posters around the school.

No matter how hard the school tried they couldn't get to the bottom of who was doing what as it had gone so far around the students.

she put in her notice in the first term back. The school and children lost a bloody good teacher because of some annying little pricks that wanted to bully a teacher.

So yes most teachers with any sense would leave as, in this day and age, you are not just dealing with the family but all of the technology that goes with the world today.

BoneyBackJefferson · 09/08/2018 16:33

chocatoo
Is it not a little rude to ignore completely? Surely a brief token acknowledgement followed by careful keeping of distance is more appropriate?

I (and other teachers) have had children deliberately sent to us by their parents so that we could look after them. Suffice to say that they were escorted back and the parents told that we were not child care.

WilburIsSomePig · 09/08/2018 16:41

Absolutely not an overreaction. A colleague of mine was on holiday in Greece last year and a family from school were in the same complex. They exchanged pleasantries and kept their distance (so she thought). A friend of hers who was also a parent of a child at the school contacted her to let her know that the DD of the other family had posted photos of her and her family in their swimming costumes by the pool/in the bar etc. Absolute fucking nightmare.

WilburIsSomePig · 09/08/2018 16:42

*posted all over Instagram

OnoAnotherNC · 09/08/2018 16:47

I'm not a teacher and don't work with children but I completely understand how your friend felt.

I have few friends who are teachers and they like to ----get utterly hammered let their hair down on holiday and having pupils in the vacinity would certainly put a dampener on things!

twoshedsjackson · 09/08/2018 17:20

A friend and colleague of mine was accosted by a parent when off-duty, keen to discuss her child's progress. The DM in question was a nurse. It was a hospital. She was in labour. Her thoughts were elsewhere.

Iamagreyhoundhearmeroar · 09/08/2018 17:22

Surely neither party would have been spending 100% of their time in the hotel?

DULLDull · 09/08/2018 17:39

I thought it was an over reaction when I first read it before t having read some of these posts Shock it's really not. I wouldn't want to bump into my children's teachers on holiday. It would just be awkward, but I would definitley do a polite hello and steer clear.

LeighaJ · 09/08/2018 17:43

This thread has been a real eye opener. My daughter is some ways off from school but this has given me insight for the future on handling seeing teachers somewhere other then school.

Although I'd never have been one to bring up school stuff with them outside of work because that's clearly rude.

Sounds like evasion is the best tactic as a parent.

@viques

"Another friend met a pupil on the top of mount Etna, we were all furious that she hadn't taken full advantage of the situation as the child was a pita."

Oh, gawd, so dark. 🤣