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AIBU?

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Original poster

Cleaner ate our snacks

247 replies

FrazzledRockRed · 08/08/2018 06:26

I’ve always said to our cleaner ‘help yourself to tea and biscuits’. I’m not the teabag and biscuit counting type so I don’t know if she did. She comes with her young dc Hmm.

Yesterday we came home to a brand new pack of 4 breakfast bars down to only one. It could only be the cleaner and dc.

There’s a difference between opening something with a countable number and having a biccie or 2.

Aibu to think this is taking the piss?

OP posts:
PanGalaticGargleBlaster · 08/08/2018 10:50

On principle I’d never have one

What principle is that?

Surely if someone wants to offer their services as a cleaner and they are treated with respect and paid fairly by their clients, then what is the problem?

Some people on here seem to think that having a cleaner amounts to some kind of Downton Abbey type of scenario or that by default you must be exploitive.

MargoLovebutter · 08/08/2018 10:52

LOL, I LOVE threads like this!!!!!

"Oh cleaner, do help yourself to biscuits and tea because I'm not a biscuit or tea bag counting kind of person."

"Holy fuck, she ate 3 biscuits out of wrappers, 3 actual biscuits. I counted them on the fingers of my one hand, it was 3 - yes definitely 3. There is a difference between opening a pack with a countable number - yes there absolutely is, even though I didn't specify that at all, when I said help yourself. Fucking bastard cleaner, how dare she eat the countable ones with wrappers!!!!! Who does she think she is? A person entitled to help herself in accordance with my instructions? From now on I'll count out a few rich tea because I've discovered I am actually a counting biscuit type of person I'm going to count those bloody teabags too."

SandAndSea · 08/08/2018 10:57

I think if you were really pleased with her work, you wouldn't be worrying about this. I would look for someone else.

Dollyrama · 08/08/2018 10:57

Maybe principle was the wrong word. I’d feel uncomfortable paying another woman to clean my house. I don’t like the idea of having domestic ‘staff’. Because usually the staff are seen as “lower than”. Just look at how the OP is talking about her cleaner.

I fully get though that most people treat their cleaners Iike the good humans they are. I can’t afford or really need one so my “principles” are academic for now.

ChocolateWombat · 08/08/2018 11:01

Margo has got it down perfectly.

You know what you need to do if you do t want this to happen again Op, simply specify clearly which biscuits she can and can't eat - spell it out more clearly. And don't waste time or energy on feeling annoyed about what has happened when your instructions weren't entirely clear.

And also acknowledge that your annoyance might not really be about the biscuits - it might be that she is doing a 'shit job' or bringing her kids - perhaps you don't like this.......but again, you have to be clear and communicate on all these things as people aren't telepathic and if you have seemed satisfied with her cleaniNg and haven't objected to the kids, why on earth should she know you don't like those things.

Please don't start considering sacking her with the biscuit thing being a reason in the back of your mind. Instead, leave very clear instructions in writing if you don't see her, and expect that you will have to communicate with your cleaner every few weeks even if you do t see them - there may well be bits of the job you'd like done more thoroughly, or areas you'd like less time spent on etc etc - you have to be willing to say these things - it's not rude or awkward and you can say these things perfectly nicely - and it is so much better than seething inside about piddling little things and letting them build up in your mind, e just assuming everyone's mind works exactly like your own and your wishes should be obvious - as anyone who has hired help at home knows, every little thing really does need to be spelled out in detail - it results in better outcomes for both the hired help and the employer too.

MrsChollySawcutt · 08/08/2018 11:03

This is such a non event.

OP you said help yourself. You did not differentiate which specific items were or were not included and I'm assuming these gold plated cereal bars aren't in a red box marked 'OP ONLY'.

Cleaner plus unspecified number of children (2?) ate a cereal bar each.

Now you are frothing and taking to social media to complain that they did what you said they could do.

Barking.

Saffy60 · 08/08/2018 11:07

My cleaner has been coming here for so many years, I don't know how long any more....she now has her breakfast with us a chat and a laugh and I don't clock watch!!! She is total gold dust I can totally trust her to be here and not steal anything, to after the dog and even my grandkids if they are here. If she finishes early I pay her and she goes early as she has done the work!

What are your priorities? Is she good at her job? Can you trust her? If so its time to stop counting biscuits! Good cleaners that you can trust and like are really hard to come by.

Elephant14 · 08/08/2018 11:09

OMG there are so many threads that are time wasting today but this literally takes the biscuit (sorry if that's been done upthread).

MilaIsobella · 08/08/2018 11:16

Personally, I wouldn't be too chuffed if my cleaner was rummaging through my cupboards, however I always make sure that she is comfortable and feels welcome to help herself to Tea/Coffee/Drinks and snacks. I got way more than I bargained for as my house is absolutely spotless and she does more than I ever ask of her so I would never dream of moaning about her.
It's a blessing that she still comes to clean your house, even if she has to bring her kids because of no child care. you are asking her to do a job, she is doing it - so if I was you, I wouldn't be picking at her over the smallest of things. Hmm

Cupcakey · 08/08/2018 11:16

You told her to help herself so she did, maybe you should have given her a list of what she was allowed to help herself too?
You said she's a shit cleaner but won't deal with it... yet come on here to rant about a pack of bloody snacks! Hmm

Tinkobell · 08/08/2018 11:16

Not worth posting about OP. If you say anything, next time she'll not take anything.

WhentheDealGoesDown · 08/08/2018 11:17

I couldn't get past bread and pasta, Grin so is she meant to boil up some pasta to eat whilst cleaning to have with a crust of bread,

Breakfast bars are quite cheap anyway, what a drama

Original poster
FrazzledRockRed · 08/08/2018 11:18

My DH does not like to eat a full meal early in the morning so has a breakfast bar. It is irritating that the were nearly finished. We are not rich but are having a cleaner so we can focus on family health issues.

She is with an agency and we pay over the odds. I don’t want to disrupt her livelihood by making a complaint and we will be moving soon so will use that as a natural break.

OP posts:
lou1221 · 08/08/2018 11:18

@margo Grin

@op Goodness, get a grip! During the last week you have complained about a dj who you text at 4am; your aunt and her family at your wedding and now Shock your cleaner eating biscuits, which you had said 'help yourself too', who apparently is shit, but you're not going to deal with that... yet. Maybe, that could be your next thread?

WhentheDealGoesDown · 08/08/2018 11:20

MargoLovebutterGrin

DarlingNikita · 08/08/2018 11:27

a dj who you text at 4am

I was on that thread and IT WAS AN EMAIL. The OP said so a billion times.

lou1221 · 08/08/2018 11:29

@darling whoops my bad, email

MarklesMerkin · 08/08/2018 11:38

I'm getting irrationally angry over the amount of people who think a breakfast bar is a biscuit! It's not even hard like a biscuit ... it's like comparing an egg to fish finger!

FourFriedChickensDryWhiteToast · 08/08/2018 11:40

" it's like comparing an egg to fish finger! "

hardly. Look it's a biscuity thing, by the biscuits..

MrsChollySawcutt · 08/08/2018 11:42

it's like comparing an egg to fish finger!

It's really not though is it? It's a baked product ready to eat out the wrapper, presumably stored in the same cupboard as the biscuits?

WhentheDealGoesDown · 08/08/2018 11:44

OP hasn't specified which sort, Belvita are like biscuits, then there are the soft bake sort and the Jordans cereal bar sort. They are all about a quid in Poundland , Asda etc as are more often than not on offer.

JohnnyKarate · 08/08/2018 11:44

Agreed MarklesMerkin

A breakfast bar is not a biscuit. They are usually made out of cereal!

It's like calling flapjack a biscuit.

JohnnyKarate · 08/08/2018 11:45

Apparently, Flapjacks are biscuits. Ignore me Grin

WhentheDealGoesDown · 08/08/2018 11:47

All this worry about biscuits and breakfast bars and shit cleaning must be much worse for the family health issues than doing a bit of your own cleaning.

PanGalaticGargleBlaster · 08/08/2018 11:51

So what's a jaffa cake?