To ask for your “not so Mumsnet” life hacks

[anothernameagain000]

While I’m a sucker for great tips to save time on ironing, cut down my cooking times and being a domestic whizz, as it’s friday evening and I’m bored - tell me your more down to earth tips... such as - “carry a spare hairband in a nightclub to help those throwing up to keep hair back, or the best way to get out stains when baby just crapped on your new carpet!

I bet a lot of mumsnet OHs got the 'musical treatment' last night from women wanting to test out some of the hacks posted here.

Especially the tip from the evil genius that is Pyongyangkipperbang.

If a coin keeps being rejected by a vending machine or parking meter, split on it a bit so it's damp and it will usually go in.

One for teens and over who come home from work, shower, put on a pair of joggers and play [insert noisy blood thirsty killing game here] for an hour, take joggers off and go to bed. Remove said joggers from wash basket next morning, fold naicely and return to wardrobe.

This thread is great.

dab dab dab and soak up stain.do not wash or rub.soak it up.then dam with hot soapie water.i repeat dab.never rub.

Have a look at the serious easy life hacks thread. It's flipping bonkers.

I didn’t know it was a thing. In future I’ll use that option. The passive aggressive comment wasn’t really necessary, now I know.

@OohOohMrPeevly
Did that when friends came over. Bastard cat dived down the bin and pulled the wrappers into the dining room exposing my home cooked lasagne for shop bought.

You must put the Tesco Finest wrappers in the outside bin. Rookie mistake.

😂😂😂 at this thread. DH just asked me what's so funny (I'm laughing so much my eyes are watering- no pun intended!). The amount of gobble bobbles 😂😂 that are in every room in this house to deal with my crazy hair, I can't tell him!!

I can't beat gobble bobble (but does anyone remember booble plate? You could have a gooble booble plate )

My tip is if people come round unexpectedly and you have dirty plates/dishes in the kitchen, hide them in the oven make sure it's not switched on though

Also, have a huge argument with your MIL early into your relationship, then you never have to see her again. You're welcome

I've found my tribe.

My friend and I spend many a happy Sunday afternoon together so the kids can have a play date, and she and I can drink wine till bedtime.

This one is a bit mumsnet but please forgive me. When you cut a slice of lime for your g&t cut up the rest and freeze so you always have a nice icy one for future drinks.

Play paper scissors rock with dcs or DH to decide things. Always choose rock when you dont really care. Lull them into a false sense of security. Choose scissors when you do care.

@fruitpastille - there's an easy life hacks thread on MN. Have a look, but I think that's already been suggested.

When DC are small tell them that chocolate buttons are called carrots.

When they start playing up in public, tell them that if they behave they can have some carrots wen they get home as a treat. Watch other parents marvel at your child's enthusiasm for vegetables.

*when

DSis convinced her dc that fizzy drinks were poisonous to children.

Gobble Bobble is amazing 😂

must not tell DH about this as I permanently have a bobble on my wrist and he’ll get suspicious

Pushing the vac round, closing the door to messy rooms and shoving as much in the cupboard as humanly possible will do for most house visitors.

On another note, my mother vacuums the walls and ceilings. I can tell I am a constant, slovenly disappointment to her 😂

Similar to carrot, I tell DS (6) if he behaves he can get smoothie later - in actuality bright, multi coloured slush full of sugar and additives from the shop round our corner! Result.

When preparing for a party just take everything upstairs, put it on your bed, and cover it with a sheet (this part only needed if you're embarrassed by the mountain of tat/it's at all possible someone might go upstairs and peek in your bedroom). It's how my family always tidies when people are coming round.

Accept that a house with children will be messy.
Teach your kids to be tidy or at least tidy-ish.

What is used to wipe walls? I have two kids, some drawings on the walls only twice then never again, I quite liked looking at the scribbles lol. Recently decorated with paper and paint and don’t dare wipe the walls incase the paint comes off. I didn’t think people do, if they are, how? If someone can tell me how they wipe walls I may start doing so in the kitchen and bathroom both look a bit gross but can’t afford to decorate just yet.

When you drive into the zoo (or big attraction type place) and the car park attendants are making you park miles away in the overflow car park, say ‘I’m just dropping the kids off at the entrance.’

There is always a free place

Buildalegohouse That’s brilliant lol. Before having the dishwasher I would hide anything dirty in the oven, especially when nurses were due round and I hadn’t cleaned up yet. If the dishwasher has actually been emptied then dirty stuff can hide in there. My kitchen always looks somewhat clean lol