To think friend should tidy up?

[sunrainandemmerdale]

I live a few minutes from city centre and I was away last weekend.
My friend was going to town for some drinks with her boyfriend and the hotel was going to be over £100.
I offered her to stay at my house and said she could stay in the spare room.
Got back on Monday and the place was a mess.
She filled my kitchen sink full of water and left the dishes in (all dirty and water nearly over the top)
My sofa had all the throws off and thrown on the floor.
My kitchen table had all the ornaments /flowers/candles thrown all over the floor.
One curtain was open and One was closed.
My bedroom (not spare room) there was no sheets on my bed and quilt cover was off.
They were in my washer (not switched on) and glasses and 2 cans of lager were left on my dressing table .
So angry

That’s totally not on!! I’d be really upset with that! Totally disrespectful. Don’t think I could be friends with someone with a complete lack of respect!

That’s awful; I’m not sure I could continue a friendship with so much disrespect shown to my home

Yes she should tidy, and apologise profusely! Have you spoken to her about it? I would be livid! I assume the sheets were off your bed and in the wash because they had sex in your bed! Totally disrespectful.

I assumed they had sex too.
The worst was she had a bad chest infection and when I was picking the dishes from the sink ..was phlegm
She must have been spitting in my sink

That's minging. She has absolutely no respect for you at all and I wouldn't call her a friend

Well - she won’t be staying again, will she!

I would not be able to stop myself from bollocking her.

It's a bit more than tidy....

She totally disrespected you and your home.

She shouldn't have made such a mess to start with nor used your bedroom.

I'd call her out on it on social media (preferably with pictures) telling people to never let her stay at their home and then never speak to her again.

That would quite possibly be the end of the friendship and certainly the end of offers to help!

I think I would have to say something to her?

Vile. I think I would have to tell her so.

If you haven't done so already then you need to say it to her, that's absolutely disgusting and totally disrespectful!! I wouldn't hold back on the dirty bitch either!!

"Mary I cannot believe how you left my place after you stayed the other night, it was disgusting! I'm not sure why the hell you stayed in my bed either when specifically said you could stay in the spare room. I'm too angry to even try and word it any nicer than you arw frankly minging. Needless to say I won't be making the same offer again"

Urgh that’s disgusting and you should tell her! Friends don’t do that to each other!

It's your home and she's completely disrespected it and you.

Depending on how much you value her friendship (although unfortunately it sounds like she doesn't value yours very much) I'd let yourself calm down and then arrange to meet her in a neutral location like a coffee shop and be direct about how her actions have upset you and see what her response is and then take it from there.

Or if you aren't too bothered about continuing the friendship then I'd just cut all contact, ignore and be glad you're no longer in touch with someone so selfish, I'd avoid discussing it through text/ phone calls/ flaming her on social media as it can get too tit for tat, especially "exposing" her on social media, it'll make you look petty and as though you can't handle your grievances like an adult or in private.

I would be sooo cross!
Have you spoken to her yet?
Was she gone when you get back?
Has she dared send you a text to say Thanks?

I would call her and ask her what the fuck she was thinking.

you must call her out on this.

Urgh. How long have you been friends

Yeah she was gone when I got back.
She just posted key through letterbox.
She said I did a little tidy round before I left ...
I'm really not confrontational but she won't be staying again.
It only took me 10 mins to tidy up thankfully

Although the sheets are getting binned!

We all have different standards of what we consider “tidy” but what you have described is dirty and totally disrespectful
I agree it’s not something that should be politely ignored, you must contact the friend and demand an explanation

Not sure she can be called a friend

Filthy besom! I'd be having words.

I wouldn't leave my own home in a state like that!
Why would I leave a hosts place like that?

Just checking, are you sure you weren't burgled? Cos that is disgusting

She said I did a little tidy round before I left
Which means it had been WORSE!

‘Whose house did you tidy? Because mine was a pigging mess when I got back!’

That should cover it.