Can i (a dad) get my toddlers Vaccination jabs done without the mothers consent?

[TheUnknowner]

Basically what it says in the title.

My soon to be wife is dead against it as she believes all that crap on the Internet about it causing autism etc

I called the doctors and she told me i would need her consent but to be honest she sounded like she just wanted to get me off the phone or maybe didn't actually know.

He is 2 in a few weeks and honestly i forgot all about it until something reminded me.

Surely being the dad i should be able to get it done i doubt she would need my consent if it was the other way around right?

I've seen this question asked several times by both mothers and fathers and I struggle with it.

I don't think you should do it behind her back, but I do think your child should be vaccinated.

Does she have any friends she trusts, who could help persuade her?

Hereditary plays a strong role in ASD (as people have already mentioned. Re measles look up what happened to Roald Dahls daughter (she dies from measles) lots of children also go deaf etc, whooping cough can kill & can leave children with long term chest problems. adults who contract chicken pox really suffer as they get the rash inside the body, eyes, ears & other mucus membrane areas all over the body. Polio kills & cripples & can reoccur later. etc etc etc. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thiomersal_controversy nb this isn't used in vaccinations & as noted mercury poisoning doesn't affect people this way (says she with old fashioned fillings !!!!!)

This is why we don't have kids with raving lunatics, ask her if she'd rather have a child with autism or a dead one? Because that's a real issue. These illnesses can kill!

Show her YouTube videos of these diseases.

DH was responsible for all of DD's vaccines as I was busy and never needed consent he managed to himself, I think this I something put in place now because they really want parents to get their children vaccinated so you should be able to.

Your issue won't be getting their vaccines it will be your relationship with the mother after because she will find out.

vaccines are very important and being the father shouldn't stop you :)

@Kool4katz
Yeah you are right i should've mentioned her brother has very severe autism

@ClaryFray
Shes not a 'raving lunatic' she's a fantastic mum i couldn't have wished for a better mum for my children (apart from this obviously)

The issue is OP that you can't get all the vaccinations at once, some of them are only effective if given as part of a series - one injection to start and then a booster or two after a set number of months. You won't be able to organise for everything to be given on Friday and if you get the start of the series on Friday your partner will know and presumably prevent the necessary follow-up jabs.

She isn't a 'fantastic mother' if she's willing to compromise the health of her kids because one man published a paper that has been refuted several times.

Be warned, you won't 'get it sorted' in one visit. If your DS is two and currently had nothing, you will need four visits over a period of months to catch up to schedule.

@cptartapp
Like i said 'apart from this'

@cptartapp
That's fine i have a good job where i can take time off on short notice if i need to

My baby had a mild version of one of the vaccinated diseases despite being vaccinated. We had to go through health protection protocols and quarantine. It was one of the scariest moments of my life. Fortunately she recovered very quickly and the Dr said the vaccine provided her protection from a full-blown version which could have had far more serious complications.

Anyone that could knowingly put their child at risk (other than because of genuine contraindications) is deeply irresponsible.

I think vaccine refusal is a child protection issue. Autonomy depends of capacity and informed consent. There is no way that informed vaccination refusal should be considered a rational decision.

It should also be grounds for denying access to nursery.

Speak to someone else at the Drs, for advice, and it doesn't have to get written in the red book, that's just for your records if you want it.

@paddy I completely agree. It makes me so angry that peoole can choose to not vaccinate their children yet are allowed to send them to school or nursery where there may be children who are immunocompromised and couldn't have the vaccines. These people rely on herd immunity.

Someone mentioned the Arnica Facebook page on a similar threads recently.....now there's a scary page with people who are genuinely putting their children's lives at risk . It's abhorrent

Gotta tell you, though, OP, it's not something I would do if I valued my relationship.

This comment of mine seems to have touched a raw nerve for some:

I think any parents ought to place their child's life and safety above their relationship, as OP is doing.
and
There are parents out there who will step up and put the well-being of their children ahead of their relationship with an unreasonable partner.

Just to clarify, I'm not suggesting OP should just not bother with vaccinations after all, in order to pacify his wife. I'm saying that I feel there are better ways to handle this than just to do it behind her back and fuck the consequences (even assuming that that's possible, if her refusal has previously been noted on the DC's records). I think it's quite likely what he is proposing to do will come out sooner or later, so imo it would be better to tackle their lack of agreement now rather than afterwards, by discussing her opinions and fears kindly rather than dismissively. HCPs do this every day of the week (some better than others, admittedly).

Despite her being denounced as a 'loon' and a child abuser on this thread, OP presumably loves her. And children need stable families as well as vaccinations.

I'd have to say my child's wellbeing comes before my relationship, hope all goes well.

I would also extend it to university as well cannot prove you have been vaccinated no university place for you (you can have the vaccinations as adults so it wont punish the child for the parents actions).

Maybe I would not make the best leader just one of my childhood friends is now completely paralyzed because she had complications from one of the vaccinated deasese (her mother was a anti vax person as well....)

Normally there has always been an understanding of implied consent when a parent presents a child for vaccination. However, the surgery is duty bound to take note if they know there is a conflict between parents. In all honesty, your best bet would be to bring her round to understanding the truths behind the scaremongering. She should perhaps be persuaded to talk to the GP or health visitor. Not the internet which is dripping with rubbish

@TheUnknowner I personally would be getting them done a lot sooner than next week!!!!!

Well done, OP - vaccines work!

You have parental responsibility (on birth certificate) so go and get them! Better your child is immunised than not, due to ignorance of the facts. MMR does NOT cause autism.

I doubt the receptionist recorded the info you gave. Book in and get them done. Or go private. Good luck for the health of your child!

I'm not Anti-Vax at all, but after reading this thread I've done some research. Apparently Vaccinations have not been tested for safety in 32 years... Also, Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) only began to occur after Vaccinations came about. Now these are absolute facts..... Bloody interesting facts

Oh don’t be ridiculous powerless

You aren't parenting alone and can't make unilateral decisions. Speak to your GP and have them set up mediation with your OH.

IME parents who are fearful of vaccinations at this point often have what I think of as parental anxiety.

That's absolute bollocks @powerless.

You've been sucked into some anti-vaxx mis-information

My husband took our DD for all her jabs as I was working. No one asked him to prove I said it was ok, why would they?

You can do it, but it will ruin your relationship.