Shop assistants asking if I need help

[blueskypink]

I probably am just being an intolerant bitch but I wish shop assistants would just leave me alone.

If I'm standing in a shop looking around with a puzzled/confused expression THEN, by all means ask me if I need help. IF, however, I'm walking purposefully towards some merchandise, am deep in concentration studying a label or an item, or have literally just walked through the door (avoiding eye contact and keeping as far away from you as possible) could you please just leave me alone?

If I want your help I'll ask for it.

I also don't want someone saying hello as I cross a threshold and saying 'bye - thank you' when I leave 5 seconds later because I've realised very quickly it's not my sort of shop.

I presume assistants are obliged to do this? Or maybe everyone else likes this sort of attention and doesn't snarl the way I do? I'm being unreasonable aren't I? But after a day's shopping I just wanted to scream "leave me the fuck alone!!"

I walk out a shop if they don't do it

Can't win can we? 🙄

When I'm Prime Minister I'll be introducing retail national service, so that those among you who have never had the "pleasure" can see what it's like having to deal with the public.

I don’t expect anybody to lose their job, that’s a ridiculous thing to say. The fault lies with the management and I’ve already stated this. .

I think both the public and staff are being screwed over by the management of these stores. Staff don’t like making vacuous small talk and being pushy and many shoppers hate it to the point they can’t face going into shops.

I hate it, too.

I walked into a shop just now during my lunch hour, and there was assistants placed all the way down the store, about 3 or 4 meters from each other, waiting to make eye contact with me and say hello.

I feel rude not doing, but it's utterly ludicrous being forced to say 'hello, hello, hello, hello, hello, hello' to a load of complete strangers.

Judging by this thread - the only people who actually want or need this personal attention are mystery shoppers. Not actual shoppers. And not the staff.

What a joke.

CeridwensCottage

I don’t expect anybody to lose their job, that’s a ridiculous thing to say. The fault lies with the management and I’ve already stated this

The comment you made earlier......

CeridwensCottage

So people should expect to feel stressed and uncomfortable so you can keep your job?

Unfortunately that's what it sounds like you mean.

Yes, that’s what the public have to do, in order for shop workers to retain their jobs. We can choose between feeling stressed and uncomfortable or we can avoid these places, which people are doing it seems. Not much of a choice is it?

Management aren’t bothered and shop workers expect everyone to play along and be super chatty and appreciate every single bit of attention we’re given, or stay at home and shop online.

Maybe a few shifts in retail may help to see the bigger picture op...do you fancy giving it a go??

I worked in Marks and Spencer's every summer and Xmas for 4 years while I was a student. I don't recall a customer ever being rude to me. But then I wasn't made to approach them.

Admittedly that was a long time ago, but, as a customer, I've never been approached by a member of staff in big stores like M&S or John Lewis. I wonder why they don't do it.

@cottage no one expects you to be "super chatty", don't flatter yourself. They don't want to have to speak to you any more than you want to be spoken to.

If treating shop workers with the minimum of courtesy is such a hardship however, then maybe you SHOULD stay at home.

So do any of you who work in retail ever feed back to management that people don't like it?

Because it is not the managers in store that have the power to change it. Some person in head office will have a piece of evidence that their shops get more sales if customers are approached. That then becomes a KPI for store management and they enforce it. What we fedback meant nothing.

I've never been approached by a member of staff in big stores like M&S or John Lewis. I wonder why they don't do it.

Because they have larger stores and it is not economical to have enough staff to man tills, put stock out etc and approach customers. The Body Shop tends to have small retail outlets so the one or two members of staff working can see all the customers and can nab them as it is such a small, open plan retail space.

@Anexcellentusername

Couldn't have put it better myself.

@Cottage

No, not much of a choice, same as the shop workers don't have much of a choice either. No one expects to you to play along and be super chatty but from the tone of your posts it's sounding to me like you are apportioning blame to the shop workers too - when over and over, and not just on this thread, it's stated it's not a choice by the shop assistant to do that, it's a must. The fault lies with the people who demand the policy and dish out the punishment to those who don't follow it, not the shop workers.

AnExcellent

So you approve of stores not being inclusive? I’m autistic and being told to stay indoors away from wider society is discriminatory, so thanks for that.

Are you being deliberately obtuse? The wording of your posts very much suggests that shop floor workers (WHO SO NOT MAKE THE RULES FOR THE UMPTEEMTH TIME) should NOT do their jobs the way which is required of them , thus potentially having disciplinary action taken against them up to and including dismissal because YOU don't like something. Now here comes the autism drip feed and accusations of being "discriminatory"? 🙄

I posted that I’m autistic ages back on this thread.

We’re evidently supposed to feel desperately sorry for the legions of harangued and browbeaten shop workers. So, rather than cause them to get into trouble, people who struggle with enforced communication - for whatever reason - are supposed to avoid that environment and stay home.

I dont think ive had a rude customer (though ine had my assistant manager in tears the other day...i didnt see it but it sounded dreadful)

I have had customers who think shop staff are below them

I work 6 hours a week in a clothes shop i used to buy from anyway, my friends husband called it a hobby job...so any real agro and id leave

But on one boxing day an already rude customer came out of the changing room and thrust their arm at me....no eye contact....no works....looking away at me....obviously excepting me to take it from them, unfortunately that didnt happen

Walk Round with headphones in even if you’ve no music on.

So the management of these companies are being discriminatory because people like me cannot visit their stores.

I’m glad this has been clarified.

Thank you:

Boots makeup depts
Lush
CurrysPCWorld
The Body Shop
L’Occitaine

Management aren’t bothered and shop workers expect everyone to play along and be super chatty and appreciate every single bit of attention we’re given, or stay at home and shop online.

Sorry i missed this

To hopefully reassure you i say hello...and its nice to get one back. But if you dont want to talk , then dont. No one minds, we dont know you from adam and ive had transactions were the customer has said maybe three words to me

Disclaimer....this may be different for supermarket as i hear that they have to keep chatting

And I’ll just add that I have never been rude to any store personnel and never would be. I’m very quiet and respectful at all times.

o, rather than cause them to get into trouble, people who struggle with enforced communication - for whatever reason - are supposed to avoid that environment and stay home

As i said before this is an excellent point (i got confused and said ASD) but tell head office and explain that they may be being discriminatory

That might have some effect....you wont get people stop saying hello but it might affect any 'pestering'.

I dont get pestered but my i have resting 'i might kill you' face and im a bit single minded so they probably give up really quickly

Oh shit

I tend to read and post as i go along

Apologies

"We’re evidently supposed to feel desperately sorry for the legions of harangued and browbeaten shop workers. So, rather than cause them to get into trouble, people who struggle with enforced communication - for whatever reason - are supposed to avoid that environment and stay home."

Poor you, imagine having to treat other people with some kind of decency and respect. Who do they think they are, saying "hello to you? The nerve. Don't they know they're supposed to be mind readers and instantly know whether you're a mystery shopper who'll get them the sack or not?

@Cottage

Genuine questions - do you have an issue with shop workers in general? Because no one is asking the wider 'we' to feel desperately sorry for them, just answering the posts about why it happens and directing the blame in the right direction, pointing out that there's no point complaining to the shop floor worker because no one listens! If it is genuinely an issue for you then you need to go higher, much higher, and take your concerns to those who can actually do something about it.

And secondly, how would it work in practice? Because no one is telepathic and can tell that customer a is autistic and struggles with being approached and spoken to unsolicited, but customer b actually will walk out if not approached and offered help! How could the expectations of any and every person to walk into a shop ever be managed? No one can know those expectations until they are told! So even if a shop assistant was willing to get into trouble for it, how could they possibly know?
As a side note, Morrison have introduced an hours shopping (on a Saturday I think) near me, which is aimed at making shopping a better experience for those with autism, ADHD and similar. The aisles are dimmed, there is no music, scanners are silenced and there are no staff putting stock out etc. I think this is a wonderful idea. Maybe you could lobby other shops to introduce similar?

I wonder how deaf people manage or autistic people who are completely non communicative. I lived near a chap who wasn’t able to acknowledge any other person at all. I think you could have tripped him up and he wouldn’t have said anything.

I wonder how management would like to deal with people like this.