Shop assistants asking if I need help

[blueskypink]

I probably am just being an intolerant bitch but I wish shop assistants would just leave me alone.

If I'm standing in a shop looking around with a puzzled/confused expression THEN, by all means ask me if I need help. IF, however, I'm walking purposefully towards some merchandise, am deep in concentration studying a label or an item, or have literally just walked through the door (avoiding eye contact and keeping as far away from you as possible) could you please just leave me alone?

If I want your help I'll ask for it.

I also don't want someone saying hello as I cross a threshold and saying 'bye - thank you' when I leave 5 seconds later because I've realised very quickly it's not my sort of shop.

I presume assistants are obliged to do this? Or maybe everyone else likes this sort of attention and doesn't snarl the way I do? I'm being unreasonable aren't I? But after a day's shopping I just wanted to scream "leave me the fuck alone!!"

Is it just me who's noticed that when you actually DO want assistance,there are no available staff to be seen? yes EE phone shop I'm looking at you. But when you're just browsing and would rather be left alone,they descend upon you?

And another thing that really bugs me is when you politely decline their offer of assistance,they then proceed to hover by you. Puts me right off as I feel like I'm being watched,and is guaranteed to make me leave the shop pretty damn quick.

Some stores, I expect someone to approach me. I will walk out phone / jewellry / similar shops if they haven't approached me, unless they are clearly serving other customers rather than gathering and chatting. I can't buy anything until they do ultimately, so if I'm not worth paying attention to, they're not worth buying from.

Other stores its ridiculously irritating being asked as soon you walk in. Then, when you actually do need help, all the staff have miraculously disappeared and you have to spend ages looking for someone who "doesn't work in that department " or clearly loathes being asked to help.

Plus the reaction you get when they ask and you actually say yes! It makes it so ungenuine.

I find the opposite. There’s never assistant to ask a question to. And if you do find one by accident you are invariably told ‘well it’s not my department so im not really sure” aka go away and leave me alone.

Another thing that I find irritating (and sorry Rufus, I didn't mention it in my op wink

Ill take that in the spirit in which (i assume) its meant

A freind of mine has just had a formal written warning becuase she didnt greet a customer

Unfortunately for her it was one of the top bods at her shops head office

That’s disgraceful, Rufus.

They make you do it and I fucking hated it to the core of my soul. I got sacked in the end because I just hated it. I was never rude if someone looked confused or looking for something I'd ask. Otherwise I'm around if you need me. The owner nearly got knocked out because he was so persistent with a customer the customer couldn't get past to leave. I absolutely hated it and I will never go into that type of retail ever again.

I really wish the Fat-Face, Weird-Fish, White Stuff & similar clothes shops would take on board that this is why I prefer to shop on line & reading this thread I’m not alone.

It doesn’t help the decline of the High Street if customers feel to harassed to shop in person.

In the other hand, I’d actually love to be bothered by Dept store cosmetic staff. As a seemingly invisible middle aged woman i’d like some attention!!!

I think it's difficult as people are different. I used to hate going to the hairdresser as I couldn't cope with the small talk about holidays and nights out. It was exhausting.

But now my hairdresser knows and we talk about politics or have periods of silence.

Sometimes I really just want to be left alone, maybe hello if they happen to catch my eye. I will always be polite, but it the fact of the attempt at small talk usually puts me on edge.

I think I might have worked it out. These management types have huge egos and expect lots of attention and like to have their egos stroked and they assume everyone else feels the same.

Only, everyone isn’t the same and most of us don’t need our egos stroked.

iamagrey

It is really, i think in their firm you can rack up a fair few warnings and nothing serious happens to you

But it would still upset me that i had to have a formal telling off over missing a greeting

And it was her first one!!

@Iamgreyhound yes- some people will wait for ages if we don't ask them! Not everyone, but some people get a bit shy, especially if it's busy in store or they want to ask about something unusual or they're stuck. Finding a balance to please everyone can be tricky, service wise, we do know we won't please everyone. Also I've seen you on lots of threads and you seem lovely . I hope I haven't made you feel horrible! I'm so sorry if I have. Xx

A lot of places try to address staff looking unapproachable, so if we have 5 people on the floor say, 2 will do jobs, 1 will man the till & cover the front, 1 will manage the fits & the back & the last one will be purposely floating all round. If it's busy, we all swap to service. However, some customers ignore or avoid the person you've purposely left free or on jobs they can easily stop and restart and go and address the bum of someone who's up a ladder, on a job. We are all happy to help but if I'm trying to affix tough metal fixtures & glass shelves to a wall, at height, I can't stop immediately without dropping something!

Also, some people expect the ENTIRE staff to help. Usually older ladies who perhaps remember being fawned on in shops in years gone by? If we're dead quiet we will spoil you with all of our attention if you want. If we're busier, looking round expectantly won't make more people come over if you're already being helped sufficiently. You just look silly and diva-ish.

The other thing that people do that we hate is nab us when we're obviously leaving or on a break. I don't mind helping people past the end of a shift, but when I have my coat on and I've got my hand bag out, I'm clearly off duty & usually need to catch a train. Your '2 minutes' could see me miss it. However, it's hard to say no. I had a regular pop her head round a fitting room curtain once (had to walk past to staff room) and ask me to fetch another size for her and get another item. I had huge outdoor coat, hat, scarf, outdoor boots and gloves on at the time, and was holding a steaming hot drink from cafe nero and my bag. She looked agog when I pointed out I was on my break!

I’m not lovely at all, DsH, but thank you

If you really hate it, YOU should be telling management, they’ll listen to the customer above anyone. Maybe a mumsnet campaign?!

I would definitely support a mumsnet campaign to get Lush staff to calm the fuck down. They’re all so lovely, but I hate that sort of service. The hello and goodbye stuff and even “do you need help with anything” I think are fine. I also love attentive but unobtrusive service in restaurants. But what I get in Lush is way OTT imo. And I don’t think anyone really likes it. It’s a bit of an expedition going in there sometimes!

Rufus can you name and shame and then we can all go on twitter or email them and tell their their policy is REALLY ANNOYING and to leave us and their staff alone!

Though given the rubbish we get about all women apparently preferring perfumed sanitary towels I suppose they'll tell us we're the minority not wanting to be hassled in shops, too.

God, running, a library insisted you greet people on the way in shock.
Why do they imagine everybody wants to be acknowledged by all around them all the time when they’re happily going about their business

Yes and libraries are a refuge for a lot of people too. They really do want to just slip in, sit down and read the paper or a book, and be left alone.

The problem is, managers won't listen - you need to contact the CEO of the company/ies involved and complain to them. Regularly.

We have to abide by our mystery shop criteria AND SO DO OUR MANAGERS. They're told what to do by the people in Head Office on the big salaries - they do what they're told because they want to keep their jobs and they need to look massively enthusiastic about talking to customers and talking to strangers about their dog, backpack or whatever else.

Well if they insist on taking it further and further, the shopping experience will end up like something akin to visiting a Moroccan souq. Lush are probably about 60% there already

I took my kids shopping at the mall a while back.

Loud music in loads of stores, to the extent I couldn't concentrate to work out what I wanted to buy.

Staff offering me things I didn't want, rather than just leaving me alone to choose what I did want.

No staff available to get shoes in the size I wanted to try on.

Didn't have half the items we wanted in stock.

It took forever to find a till that was staffed.

We had to wait in line forever to pay because they were harassing every customer multiple times to take out their loyalty card.

Then I went home and read a news report saying that online shopping is killing in-store shopping. No, in-store shopping is killing in-store shopping by being shit.

Sorry running i would hate to get my friend potentially into further trouble

And my shop although part of a chain isn't really hot on it at the moment although I believe other branches are

We did have a lady come in yesterday who was with us for about an hour, maybe a smidge more and left very very happy saying how much she loves our store as we are so helpful

While they are also getting feedback like that I doubt they will change the greeting policy

BUT i do think it would be worth people who find this sort of thing incredibly uncomfortable for various reasons including the ASD someone mentioned (sorry if ive got something wrong there) complaining as its not very inclusive

It wont stop the hello but it might stop pushy salespeople

I worked in retail for a few months last year and we had to do this too. In fact, each customer HAD to be approached three times 1. Greeting 2. Offer of help 3. Show them at least one item. I hated it but head office reckoned it was EXACTLY what their recent customer survey had asked for. I was happy to say hello to everyone and a quick ‘let me know if you need any help’ but I made it known I didn’t buy the ‘survey’ was genuine and to her credit the manager agreed.

I hate it. It makes me feel so pressured to buy something and as a conscious consumer that feeling utterly riles me. I usually just leave the shop.

I remember this when I worked for JL in the 1970s. Our manager used to come onto the shop floor on a Thursday evening (the late shopping night) and sometimes other times and tell us to approach random customers to offer to help. One night I remember he said, "Go and ask that lady if you can help her" "I have done, Mr M, just now - she doesn't want any help" "Go and ask her again". I would have loved the floor to open and swallow me up. I believe I went over and said, "I know you don't want any help, but my manager has just asked me to ask you again" . They were quite nice about it! At that time, certainly, it would have been unthinkable to suggest to your DM that his approach was wrong and annoyed customers - no-one would have done it (you would have expected your retail career to progress no further - I don't mean you would have been sacked but your card would have been mentally marked by the manager you made your impertinent suggestion to) and I can't think people would do that even now. The manager is hardly likely to think their staff are right and they are wrong.