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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Neighbour does not like the look of my garden - threatening to sue

566 replies

craxmum · 29/07/2018 10:03

A new neighbour has moved in last month (we are sharing a wall in a semi-detached property). She seems to have a major issue with the way my garden looks (just paid me a visit at 7am on Sunday to inform me that she hasn't slept properly since she had a party last night and her guests were apparently "aghast"). First thing she did after moving in was decking and astroturfing her back garden fence to fence (the bits that weren't already covered in concrete).

She did mention it a couple of times before, but I never thought it bothers her that much. Now she made a vague threat of suing me for damage to her assets, as apparently her house value and enjoyment of her property is impacted. I mean, she bought it a couple of weeks ago (at the normal market value as far as I can see from the open sources), surely she made the decision with full awareness of what my garden looks like? She added a couple of personal insults (about me being foreign etc) as well.

My garden is a bit informal allotment style. We grow berries, tomatoes, courgettes, peppers, beans, herbs - stuff like that, also have a couple of dwarf fruit trees. Sunflowers all over the place at the moment. I have two small children (3 and 5), they absolutely love it and they have their own little experimentation areas. There is a bit of lawn, but with two dogs it is not in great shape - trimmed, but with some bald patches. There is an occasional weed or two, or maybe ten. Plenty of butterflies and bees. A composter (of a posh type, fully closed and maintained, not leftovers rotting in a bin). There is a water butt and sometimes watering cans / other gardening equipment lying around. I mean, it is by no means perfect, and can sometimes be messy and looks quite rustic, but I absolutely cannot see what I can do to comfort her apart from ripping all vegetation out and paving over.
AIBU?

OP posts:
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birdladyfromhomealone · 30/07/2018 10:25

Buy a cockrel that will really give her something to moan about!

MistyMistiness · 30/07/2018 11:03

Ignore the trout. There is no one way to have your garden in the UK and if you (like millions of other people) want to grow produce in your garden then you should be able to do that without your neighbours interference. For the record, your garden sounds like my dream garden. I am desperate to get an allotment up and running in our garden!

Shampooeeee · 30/07/2018 11:07

actually I think you should ramp the rustic up.... get a scarecrow on the go.

^^bonus points if you can make it look like twatty neighbour.

Your garden sounds lovely, hers sounds gross.

Neededastealthname · 30/07/2018 11:12

My neighbour has just put down fake grass and it's awful! Your garden sounds beautiful, I thought you were going to say it was in a complete state. She can't sue you for goodness sake, she's batty but she also might be trouble so keep a record of everything she says.

LaDilettante · 30/07/2018 11:21

If you’re feeling creative...

Neighbour does not like the look of my garden - threatening to sue
StormTreader · 30/07/2018 11:21

"We buy tomatoes from supermarkets"

Thats an easy one to counter, prepare a solid 20 minute lecture on food miles and carbon footprint from shipping food in from other countries and deliver it without pausing for breath at full volume with hand genstures. If you do a good enough job, they may end up apologising to you for not helping save the planet by growing food as well.

butterballs9 · 30/07/2018 13:04

I wonder if you have considered rearing any livestock? A few chickens and a rooster perhaps? Maybe a few pigs? A rooster shouldn't bother your neighbour as she is clearly an early riser, with the 7am visit on a Sunday morning. I would embrace the 'Good Life' spirit with wind chimes, a scarecrow, a full menagerie of pets and young children. In the last two houses I have lived in there has been a next door neighbour who has been a complete arse. The current one is arguable the worst. When we moved in and submitted planning permission to modernise and extend the property (which anyone would have done - it needed a lot of work) the neighbour, who was head of the local residents' association, wrote a large piece in the next edition of the residents' newsletter complaining about how we shouldn't have bought the house if it wasn't what we wanted. This despite the fact that his own house has had numerous extensions and additions. It was such a lovely welcome to the neighbourhood! Then, when the builders arrived, either he or his wife would turn up on the front door and complain about the noise saying that it was spoiling their lunch party or that one of their children couldn't revise.

Soon to be ex made the mistake of letting him into the house so he could rant on and on and his wife took to writing soon to be ex long letters. Thankfully, even soon to be ex got fed up with him and ended up telling him what he thought of him. They are the most objectionable couple.

As we are soon to be moving, I take great pleasure in winding them up (I know - I really should rise above it) and have loud conversations on my mobile about how we are selling to a huge family with seven children who are submitting a massive planning application.

Ta1kinpeace · 30/07/2018 15:59

She's lucky you don't have a boat in your garden ....
this one has been a landmark for 40 years
www.flickr.com/photos/imp1/13223868205

MothertotheLordsofmisrule · 30/07/2018 16:45

Your garden is lovely.

Yes you can buy tomatoes in the shops, but nothing beats picking your own and a crafty couple straight in my pie hole.

I suspect her ‘aghast’ friends were just doing that British thing of going “I know! Just awful” without actually listening or agreeing.
Think Sybil from Fawlty Towers.

RoseWhiteTips · 30/07/2018 17:15

Your garden sounds lovely. Hers sounds dreadful - ugh.

RoseWhiteTips · 30/07/2018 17:18

Just scrolled back and found your pic. It is charming and very lovely.

shinnnypin44 · 30/07/2018 17:29

I think your garden sounds amazing, she knew what it looked like before buying her house so she doesn’t have a leg to stand on. She is obviously bonkers

Scotland32 · 30/07/2018 17:31

You should sue her for having no taste and for damaging the environment with her astro turf (run off from it contributes to flooding where normal grass helps to soak up excess water; one day her astro turf will be in landfill - unlike your lovely veggies etc.....)

DagenhamRoundhouse · 30/07/2018 17:31

She sounds a complete neurotic. Tell her to go ahead and try and sue - she'd be laughed out of any solicitor's office. And I hate that she's decked and astroturfed her garden. Ruinous to wildlife except for rats - I hope she gets nests of them underneath. Birds need grass for insects.

Whereisthegin1978 · 30/07/2018 17:32

She's crazy ! She'd get laughed out of a lawyers and a court. I'm envious of your lovely sounding garden - I seem to kill any plants we put in.

Feltedbump · 30/07/2018 17:34

OP, whilst I like the scarecrow idea, I think what your kids would JUST LOVE for the summer would be an old clapped-out rusty scrap car dumped in the middle of the garden, to play in and out of....
Give her something to stew over, eh?

Katherine2626 · 30/07/2018 17:35

She is deranged. Just smile and say that suing you sounds fine - trying to find a solicitor should keep her busy for a good while. I would love to sit in your garden - it sounds really joyful!

kaytee87 · 30/07/2018 17:37

Saw your update op. I'm sorry such a bad neighbour has moved next door, I hope she doesn't cause you more issues.

wallowinwater · 30/07/2018 17:54

Your garden is beautiful, I am very jealous and wish I had a bigger garden and the skills and patience required Smile

bemusedmoose · 30/07/2018 17:54

Garden sounds lovely, unlike the neighbour who sounds like a bit of a Margo!

Firstly she cant sue, 2nd it's still at the same value and 3rd and most importantly - it's none of her business how you plant out your garden, unless you cover it in laylandii.

Smile sweetly and tell her and her friends to put their stuck up sticky beaks back in the prosecco. Also add that all that plastic astro tuff and decking are terribly bad for the environment and have probably devalued your house.

Irishmomma14 · 30/07/2018 17:56

Call the police ,
That’s harassment and it’s YOUR property !!. You should complain about her “ parties “ !!

Myheartbelongsto · 30/07/2018 17:56

She's pissed off your foreign not at your garden.

bemusedmoose · 30/07/2018 18:01

Maybe she'd prefer nice marble statue (i suggest one with a nice water feature willy pointing in her direction.)

OhWhatFuckeryIsThisNow · 30/07/2018 18:05

If you go for a scarecrow, is there one available that is motion sensored and will turn its head to watch her? Personally I'd ramp up the nature side, a huge bird feeder, birdbath, encourage foxes. You'd be doing your bit for the planet (and would really piss her off)

ItsNachoCheese · 30/07/2018 18:07

craxmum the mirror have picked up on your thread in case you didnt know