Affairs at work

[HeyThatsNotMyName]

How common are affairs in the workplace?

Now in my early 30s and before the last fortnight, I thought workplace affairs was something that happened very rarely or just in the media (tv, films etc.) Now, after learning not one but four colleagues have been having affairs at work, I'm not so sure.

Was I being naive this whole time?

Ah thanks @Reaa - I am naive, I only know of 2 people who have had affairs.

I once worked in an FE College. Lots of affairs between the staff.

It's very common in hospitality as well, because the hours are so anti social so you don't really have the opportunity to meet people outside of work. I met my DH at work, we were both single though. Been working in hospitality for over 10 years and I have known of loads of collegues having affairs.

I think you need a certain antenna twitching to notice it. I didn't notice much for years (though there were a few that were too blatant to miss) and then I met my husband, who is a very very sexual man. You can look at my posts in the BDSM dungeon thread in the Sex topic if you really want to know more. After I met him, I did start picking up on this sort of thing more. Then I had a kid and it stopped dead.

I think I sort of enjoyed being attuned to it while it lasted (never took up with any married people, unless I knew for sure they were in open marriages, and my relationship wasn't monogamous for quite some time). I felt my eyes had opened up and I'd entered some sort of secret club. I sort of miss it a bit now that I've got a toddler and it's stopped, but my husband is who matters and I'm happy in our little family knot.

I've heard so many stories from friends who work in schools and in hospitals. My workplace is pretty dull by comparison, although I did have a colleague who started a rumour about me and the man I worked most closely with. It wasn't true, but I think sometimes people want to believe gossip.

I used to work in a university, and the number of professors who left their (often decades long) marriages for a younger postdoc was eye opening.

Pretty common in my line of work. Unsociable hours and shared very stressful experiences where you kid yourself that your partner wouldn’t understand.

Everywhere I've worked there has been some. However I now work at the most boring place in the world. However recently found out one of the guys in our team is having an affair with someone at work - don't know who. He is married with 3 kids, rather large, belches a lot. I am perplexed yet itching to know who it is!

My exh met his gf at work and left me for her, and he'd had an affair at work before that.

I work in an office with 1 other person and he's gross. I wish I worked somewhere that had hot guys to hook up with lol.

Working in the city it’s v common, not necessarily full blown affairs but a lot of casual shagging.

I am not the type to have affairs, but i was single for a few years in my 30s a large proportion of the men I worked with and even some who I knew socially came on to me. I was outraged for their usually quite fabulous other halves and made that clear and the only response I'd get when I asked why was "opportunity" or along those lines. i have been left with the lasting impression that very few men even try to be faithful but I am still a romantic and hope that I am wrong.

Friend of mine worked in a big company, her team manager was married and having an affair with 3 women at work as well. Two of them and his wife all got pg at the same time and he ended up 'working' all hours because all of the mums wanted him to see his babies, so he was drivinf from house to house before and after work. Not sure how much his wife knew.

I posted up-thread about the affair between school parents.
I also worked in a law office for years and the amount of affairs thay went on there was unbelievable!
Mostly the Partners all leaching (and all married) after the new young girl that had started.
I cannot tell you how many girls fell for the nonsense and had long affairs, as soon as the men were bored or the extra girlfriend became too much of a hassel, they were promptly dumped and left very soon after as things were so awkward!

There's a dungeon on MN?

I had an affair at work once. If you can call it that, I wasn't married, he was. Dirty old perv (him, not me)

Where my ex worked every single member of the senior exec team was either on their second marriage to a much much younger colleague, or having an affair with one. I came to the conclusion money and power has a weakening effect on knicker elastic as none of them were anything other than arrogant, unpleasant, aging and over weight.

AllIHaveToDo Throwing in the keys is just that. All the men put their keys in a bowl. The women pick out a key, then have sex with whoever owns them! Never fancied it myself!

I don't think it happens at my place but we've only got three men out of about 40 people and two of them are single.

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Please post a link when you do. I couldn't find it.

I was a legal secretary for many years and it was quite common for staff to be having affairs. The last firm I worked for there were so many it was untrue.

I seemed to be quite good at picking up on them though. I would be pretty sure that X and X were having an affair quite a long time before it seemed to be common knowledge and often many would be really surprised.

A few of my family members work in the police force and they say it is so rife it's untrue. Apparently most of them don't even try to hide it.

Everywhere I've ever worked there has been somebody "knocking off" someone else..... sometimes multiple someone else's too !!

I'm a teacher, affairs have been rife in every school I've worked in and it's disgusting.

In my previous school an affair between 2 colleagues caused a huge situation where about a dozen other members of staff were dragged into a huge mess. The worst thing was that people got to the stage of disciplinaries and the affair couple walked off into the sunset.

There was also the expectation that you'd enter into something if someone else showed willing.

People were so indiscreet with it was what shocked me. Shagging in the Boardroom and forgetting/not checking that the video link is on.(the US office got an eyeful apparently). When I was a PA in banking, a receptionist in charge of booking meeting rooms booked one for her & the guy she met on her lunch, and for a quickir. She was new so didn't know all the rooms have cc TV camera's. My IT ex told me tapes of people in work car parks and meeting rooms are so common they get passed around between Security & IT.

In my workplace it is surprisingly a woman colleague (team / exec assistant) who is the main perpetrator. All male new hires have to pass through her bed. She is in her mid-late-40s, and her latest trophy is a 19 year old summer intern, younger than her daughter. She's happily married too.

Depends what you class as an affair tbh.
One night only sex / ongoing flirting to the physical (do you include hugs etc) / emotional support with physical contact and sharing of feelings / meeting up regularly for sex / having a full blown dating relationship