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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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AIBU to ask is there single woman on here?

439 replies

alphamale33 · 25/07/2018 07:33

That look to be wines and dine?

Greeting I come here from a Poland and today I look for hot date. Please I have 33 years and looks good! Big balance bank is mine aswell other thing big ;-)

Tomasz Wielka

OP posts:
Thread gallery
12
TattyFrench · 25/07/2018 09:53

Maybe Mr Tickle is Thomasz?

OurMiracle1106 · 25/07/2018 09:54

I love to be wined and dined. If you would just transfer 10,000 as proof of your bank then we can arrange a meet?

PerryPerryThePlatypus · 25/07/2018 09:54

This thread is fantastic Grin

AngryAttackKittens · 25/07/2018 09:56

I'm rather disappointed that Tomasz didn't add 69d. Tsk tsk, Tomasz, you'll never find a date that way.

HopefullyAnonymous · 25/07/2018 09:59

I could use a strong penis in my life....

Zoflorabore · 25/07/2018 10:03

Well well well, my dd (7) is breaking up for the summer at 12.30 and I felt pretty crap today ( poor and fed up ) POOR I tell you Tomasz, and then I found this thread.

Thank you for making me much happier, I almost tried to hitch hike from Liverpool to London to meet you and your mushy pea ( I don't like mushy pea but would have made an exception for you ) and then I find you aren't real Tomasz. I am now cry big tears.

Next time I look for nice man with Mercedes and who makes a good mushy pea I will be sure to ask him if he has strong penis.
I've always wondered why my sex life is crap, I must have had only weak penis.

Thank you for making me realise that.
All the best dear 💋

ShatnersWig · 25/07/2018 10:05

Tomasz' favourite song is Ken Dodd's Happiness. But he misheard the lyrics as

A penis
A penis
The greatest gift that I possess
I thank the Lord that I've been blessed
With more than my share of a penis

Mrsemcgregor · 25/07/2018 10:06

May Michael is also a single lady, like princess Michael of mumsnet?

FolderReformedScruncher · 25/07/2018 10:06

Oh Tomaz. Thomaz Thomaz Thomaz.

PanPanPanPing · 25/07/2018 10:09

Good point, Mrsemcgregor!

Datun · 25/07/2018 10:09

Posting for deletion message.

It better be good.

CaMePlaitPas · 25/07/2018 10:10

Where did Tomasz go? Sad

PipLongStockings · 25/07/2018 10:10

@ShatnersWig
Bloody brilliant Grin

Singlenotsingle · 25/07/2018 10:10

Has Mr Tickle got a penis strong as well, Hebeofmumsnet? Any port in a storm, hey?

AngryAttackKittens · 25/07/2018 10:11

Come back, Tomasz! You still haven't told us how you keep your penis strong! Press-ups? Lifting the Mercedes?

Caaarrrl · 25/07/2018 10:14

Why delete this hilarity?

Spoil sport whoever reported it.

Pinkyponkcustard · 25/07/2018 10:17

Yes shame on you reporter!

Although you might have saved me from the sack as I’m sniggering behind my monitor.

Handsoffmychansey · 25/07/2018 10:18

Classics.

WhoAteAllthePercyPigs · 25/07/2018 10:22

Oh this is gold! Peak Mumsnet Grin I was feeling sorry for myself after a night of no sleep but Tomasz and friends have cheered me right up. Don't delete this please!

Wolfray · 25/07/2018 10:22

I was not expecting this when I logged on to Mumsnet this morning. Grin

Liffydee · 25/07/2018 10:24

This post is hilarious 😂

iklboo · 25/07/2018 10:29

Tomasz, Tomasz has penis strong
Tomasz, Tomasz can do no wrong
Tomasz, Tomasz drives a Merc
Tomasz, Tomasz is he a jerk?
Tomasz, Tomasz cook mushy pea
Tomasz, Tomasz the man for me

user546425732 · 25/07/2018 10:31

@hebemumsnet don't delete him, he's good for our collective mental health and we promise to share him. I'm sure all the humour can reach the parts where his hard penis will fail.

HebeMumsnet · 25/07/2018 10:34

OK, OK. As it's summer holidays, you can keep Tomasz. BUT if we find you're not cleaning out his sawdust or putting him in his wheel and giving his strong penis an airing twice a day, he's going STRAIGHT back to the troll rescue centre, got it?

We'll leave the thread up for now.

Tabathatwitchett · 25/07/2018 10:35

Tomasz has a touch of the Donald Trump with his bigly Mercedes and his stronger than anyone else's penis. I'm wondering whether DT was having a break from Twitter and thought he'd check out MN...