What MNisms irrationally annoy you?

[wellBeehivedWoman]

I know IABU to complain about something so petty but I don't care. Come and share your trivial mumsnet annoyances! What phrases / abbreviations / MN colloquialisms drive you crazy? I'll start:

1. Any time anyone uses the phrases 'boobing', 'boobed' etc when referring breastfeeding. Not only does this give me a mental image of a clown squirting milk from a comedy flower in their lapel, it also has a kind of juvenile, jolly-hockeysticks false cheer that makes me want to die.

1. Pg as an abbreviation of pregnant. No idea why I hate this. Maybe because it doesn't really resemble the full word? Irrationally despise it.

1. 'Little one' instead of baby or child. Too twee to be allowed. V similar to the phrase 'our little family', usually used when someone has a new baby and wants the equivalent of a papal enclave to keep friends and family at arms length. Absolutely loathesome because I am a grumpy and unreasonable cow

Any others that really wind you up?

@Disquieted1 I'm gutted the naiborg has gone!

When posters write out the text message they think the person should send.
"Dear whoever has pissed you off
I know exactly what you should write because I know better than everyone else.
From

@SalemBlackCat, what you're dismissing and getting annoyed over are perfectly valid regional dialect phrases. There's nothing wrong or bad about posters using them... If you don't understand and are getting annoyed because of that it's on you, not on the poster using a phrase 95% of readers will understand.

Poorly, for example, is a word used to mean unwell by a vast swathe of the north of England.

"Foof." Foof off.

How every fucking thing is "grim".

And if you have to ask someone "did you mean to be so rude? Ahahah", then chances are that yes, they did and are glad you noticed.

Open letters to random people in the street

“Dear random woman in the street
Your children are badly behaved and if....”

Or

“If you were the woman in the street today who.....”

Someone on a recent thread posted hubby OP? Boak . (I had to google it. It means vomit. Still dont get it) . I never say DH in RL, I dont know one person that does.

For those who seem to take my 'what irrationally annoys you' personally, yes, I KNOW they are valid regional dialect and phrases. I know that. However were were asked what MNisms annoy us. I gave my opinion. Is that okay with you people? I just find those words (esp fancy, poorly) to be extremely old-fashioned and something you'd read in a 1940s Enid Blyton book. I didn't know that people still speak that way even today. It just annoyed me and I picture very old, prim, proper people dressed in various shades of beige and gray, in an ancient setting with a very old copper pot and no tv or mod cons using those terms (along with jolly well, pip pip old bean, etc etc). I was simply surprised that people still talk that way, that's all, as I associate it with ancient times. It is how I view it in my mind, whether rightly or wrongly. And we were asked what things irrationally annoy us, so there you go. I didn't mean for people to get so deeply offended. How very dare me indeed! Sorry!

@Salem think the point is that they're not in any way mumsnetisms. It's just English.

@SalemBlackCat

Don't get your knickers in a twist... Yes people still use those phrases (I assure you that I don't own one but of beige clothing) and you're basically getting wound up by the way thousands of people talk on a daily basis. It's not them (or me) who are being unreasonable, is it now pet?

All the cries of abuse and LTB when men aren’t perfect.

Annoys me because it undermines real abuse

@SalemBlackCat

You are really not endearing yourself to anyone here.

A simple "Sorry, you people' - now that would actually work here.

Oh and @Salem we don't live like Enid Blyton books here either. It may surprise you to hear we've moved on a bit!

@QuestionableMouse I am not the one getting my knickers in a twist over someone else's contribution to 'what MNisms irrationally annoy you'. Those who are personally offended by my contribution are.

@2018SoFarSoGreat what do I have to apologise for? That certain words rationally or irrationally annoy me? That I contributed to a thread that asked us what irrationally annoys us? "I have to say that I am quite offended by your posts here." I have to say, I don't care. That is on you, not me. I explained that it is MY opinion. I am sorry you feel so offended by my personal OPINION. But that is what it is. An opinion. My view. My feelings. My opinion. Be they irrational as they may be. I have nothing to apologise for. I suggest you try not to take these so personally and so seriously, and ease up.

That many MNers think it is a badge of honour to never iron any clothes.

Actually, it doesn't irritate me, but I do iron some of my clothes because I don't want to look like a scruffy mess.

@SalemBlackCat- this site is predominantly used by posters from the UK. If you don't like how we speak why not piss off fo somewhere you don't have to see it ?

The word “Grabby” is like nails down a blackboard.

Please, try avaricious, greedy, grasping, materialistic etc. It’s not even a proper word.

Ddog instead of just dog, or similar. Why make it longer?!

Salem

I was brought up in northern England. I use daft, wee (to mean small) and poorly in my everyday speech. These are not mumsnet words but standard variants of English. Fancy and twee are also perfectly normal words.

These words may annoy you but that's nothing to do with mumsnet.

It's pretty rude to tell a bunch of British people on a British website that their own language is wrong.
Pick people up on bad grammar by all means.

I wouldn't dream of going on a US website and telling posters that 'nursing' was cringeworthy & old fashioned, and that they 'should' be using 'breastfeeding'. The regional and international variations in English are a great thing.

The phrase I hate most is being described as a 'handmaiden' because I don't subscribe to the majority view on FWR on trans issues.

It's so patronising.

Before that the phrase I hated most was 'boils my piss'.

And the poems. Never funny or clever.

Oh shurrup, Pony
I'll type my baloney
I'm passing the time
'tis no crime to rhyme

Like a storm in a cup
I'm winding you up
but just 'fore I go
I'll get my ducks in a row

“You do realise that [something they really hope the op doesn’t realise so they can be all smug] don’t you?”

“So...”

Absolute hash of typos/bold fail/strikeout fail - “Argh, stupid phone!” No, you didn’t preview before you posted.

D. Always, but especially when, either, the poster clearly dislikes the ‘D’ person, or I can’t tell who they’re talking about.

Writing a comment and then including a (usually more interesting) comment which is struck through at the end. The order doesn’t make sense. Surely the struck through comment goes first, with the unstruck comment at the end. I always imagine someone writing a letter by hand and leaving a gap in their sentence which is the exact right size to allow a later mistake to be corrected.

HTH

.

And the drip feeds.

DH has been shouting at me and just walked out...
MN: he's an abusive shit. You're better off without him. LTB.

200 sympathy posts later...
All I did was sleep with his brother, and his father, and his mother....
..

See, this isn't a MNism. It's a general societal thing that I DESPISE so much and that is...

calling any baby without a name 'Baby'.

'Oh, baby looks so sweet in that jumper! Feed baby, wash baby gently' etc.

I fucking HATE it. No reason why. No reason for it. It just feels so patronising.