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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be thinking now of telling dh I don’t like him in vest tops ?

140 replies

LardLizard · 17/07/2018 15:58

He was wearing on yesterday and I just find them yuk
Don’t know if it’s the hair arm pits or what
I was thinking oh don’t like him in that
But thought well it's got etc

Then we were talking about packing for holidays when he said I’ve just bought a few more of these pointing to his best top

I thought oh njustvweatva bloody t shirt !!

OP posts:
fuckthisforfun · 17/07/2018 16:33

Dh wears these on holiday, I don't see the problem really. I'm wearing vests tops and boob tubes (getting my shoulders out despite not doing so in scotland for the rest of the year) so surely he can wear a sleeveless t-shirt and be comfortable.
If it's out of control pit hair that puts you off ask him to tidy it up so it's not sticking out everywhere.

SneakyGremlins · 17/07/2018 16:33

adaline Exactly.

Plus there's always posters who imply it'd be fine if the man looked good in it but not otherwise.

Yet if a man were to say "She can wear that dress but ideally she should only put it on if her tits look great in it" there'd be uproar.

DarthLipgloss · 17/07/2018 16:34

Mine lives in vests however I think he looks good. I don't think I'd tell a grown up not to wear something especially when its a summer thing and if it's very hot.

adaline · 17/07/2018 16:36

Those posts have already started @SneakyGremlins

But if a man came on and said his wife could only wear a dress if she was a size 8 and looked like Blake Lively there would be hell to pay!

Double standards galore!

Shodan · 17/07/2018 16:39

I used to hate them on XH, because he was always sweaty and had a lot of armpit hair Blush but current OH is muscular, toned and Mediterranean colouring and I love them on him Grin But perhaps most crucially, he trims his underarm hair so it's not all long and straggly.

All that said, I never told XH he couldn't wear them, because it was his choice , so I don't think there's a lot you can do really. Sorry.

BlueTears · 17/07/2018 16:46

Reverse this...

My wife loves this dress that shows off her shoulders, I hate it. How should I tell her not to wear it?

Well if she looks like Beyoncé then it's great and if she looks like dawn french it's gross.

  • - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Let's all wear what we are happy to wear ffs!

Coffeeisyourfriend · 17/07/2018 17:02

I don't mind my DP wear them in the house or if nipping to the shop, I wouldn't go out with him wearing one unless on holiday, he has far too many nice t shirts to wear instead of a manky old vest!

Firsttimemum892 · 17/07/2018 17:04

I agree with you I hate men in vests , I think on holiday at the beach or around the pool is ok but other than that no. I would say oh I don’t like those vests in a jokey way but if they make him happy let it slide ha my partner has the worst taste in trainers and I often call him out about it but he doesn’t listen ha

ConciseandNice · 17/07/2018 17:06

He’s got a right to wear what he wants, but they are very scruffy looking and you have every right to tell him you don’t like them on him. It’s not policing, it’s being a wife with a scruffy hubby (I’m one of those).

parkermoppy · 17/07/2018 22:49

completely agree with the notion that he is a grown man and you shouldn't stop him from wearing what he likes. but maybe if you really hate the type like you have posted a picture of, you could try find some nice ones you like for him for holiday? he might not like them, but then again maybe he will and its a happy medium of you still fancying him

TrickyKid · 17/07/2018 22:52

They are truly awful on any man. Not a good at all. Makes me cringe when I see men in these but he's a grown man and can wear what he likes.

fedup2017 · 17/07/2018 22:54

What... Men trim their underarm hair these days ???
My mind is truly blown.

TroubledLichen · 17/07/2018 23:04

Well I’d never tell DH what to wear as such but I would start off nicely and say they don’t suit him/aren’t very flattering. If it came to it I’d definitely tell him that the appearance of one of those would ensure I went off sex for the duration of the holiday and as long as it took to get the image of him in it out of my mind.

And if I looked awful in something I would bloody hope my husband would tell me! I don’t think there’s a female equivalent of a garment so awful as a wife beater vest though... Thoughts anyone?

LadyDeadpool · 17/07/2018 23:08

I don’t think there’s a female equivalent of a garment so awful as a wife beater vest though... Thoughts anyone?

a vest top on a woman with bingo wings who doesn't shave her armpits? Like the one I'm currently sporting with my bingo wings and unshaved armpits. Luckily for me my husband isn't a judgmental prick who thinks only women who look perfect should wear certain clothes Smile

Gileswithachainsaw · 17/07/2018 23:13

Don't be so mean. It's so hot. I think we all have certain things we like to see our dps in but ultimately we have no right to say what they should or shouldn't wear .

I know if be pissed if I was told I should not wear a top. Would make me buy multipacks of them

FASH84 · 17/07/2018 23:14

It wouldn't be ok for him to tell you what to wear. It works both ways.

Ethylred · 17/07/2018 23:27

No he does not have a right to wear horrible clothes and nor do you.
Horrible as judged by me BTW.

Booop · 17/07/2018 23:32

I don't think I've ever met a man who shaves or trims his armpit hair...Let him wear what he wants. My DH wears polo shirts sometimes and I hate them but never say anything.

Branleuse · 17/07/2018 23:36

Im not keen on them on men but theyre so much cooler to wear when its hot than a tshirt so i would never say anything

DieAntword · 17/07/2018 23:44

“Going for the Rab C Nesbit look I see”

AlecTrevelyan006 · 17/07/2018 23:57

Every one has the right to look hideous

llangennith · 18/07/2018 00:08

Ok for the gym. Not ok everywhere else. Hide them.

Sisterlove · 18/07/2018 06:11

If he's happy wearing them, leave him to it. I don't like all of my OHs clothes, but I leave him to it.

ifeelsoextraordinary · 18/07/2018 06:34

As PP, Americans call them wife beaters. As such I get irrationally angry when I see men in them!

Troels · 18/07/2018 06:35

Jeippinghmip Yep Wife beater shirts. I think that name came from shows like COPS in the US, seems like the men getting arrested for beating their partners always seemed to be wearing one sadly.
They all think they look like the picture halfwitpicker When in reality they look more like Onslow. At the beach they can get away with it, shopping and out to eat they are awful.