Children in child-free complex - WIBU?

[Iltavilli]

We live in a complex of flats where children are not allowed to live. A neighbour (not sure which) has regular visitors who bring children. One of the children is a toddler and rings our entry system bell as it is the lowest on the pad. They allow him to do this and simply say “sorry it’s a child”, they don’t discourage his behaviour. They also allow the children to play around the meticulously maintained and non-child-friendly landscaped gardens. This is a “naice” area, and we pay a premium to live in a child-free complex. AIBU to complain?

It makes it sound like they send in the child catcher and take all the kids away in a big sack. People CHOOSE to live there!
It’s purely voluntary.

Believeitornot

Of course children are people. However, that doesn’t mean they are entitled to go everywhere. I love my DD and I’m a teacher, I’m not anti-kids, but children are noisy, messy, and full of energy.

The OP does not want to live near children therefore, she moved to a child free complex.

Not everyone likes children. Not everyone wants to live near children. That is surely easy to understand!

Frankly, my DD has impeccable manners when out. That doesn’t mean I can take her to a child free wedding. Even though I know she will be better bahaved than many of the adults.

My DM is 80 and lives in an over-55s complex near us. She moved there after her husband of 55 years, my dad, died 2 years ago. My 10yo DD goes round once a week after school for a few hours. My 13yo DS does the same on a different day. Yesterday he changed some lightbulbs for DMs neighbour. Pesky children . After years of caring for DF I swear it’s taken years off her being nearer her grandchildren. Sometimes we all go round and you might be able to hear us laughing. Never occurred to me that we might be pissing people off . No buzzer-ringing, though, that’s just bad manners

If they’re inside her flat and not playing football in the flowerbeds it’s not remotely the same thing, Avon
No need for you to get all offended on behalf of your children when nobody’s accused them of anything.

If there was enough affordable, appropriate housing for everyone, that would be a choice. But since there's not, child-free housing sounds discriminatory to me. But then I also think it should be illegal to refuse people because they receive benefits.

There's nothing discriminatory about it. It's a private development built to cater for couples who don't have children and don't want to be bothered by other people's children.

It wouldn't be my cup of tea but I can totally understand why older couples in particular might want to live somewhere quiet and peaceful and not be disturbed by kids out playing early in the morning, or kicking footballs around at night etc.

I would assume any complex with rules like that are privately owned? . Why are you assuming anybody is being discriminated against when it’s a case of people making a lifestyle choice and paying for the privilege? What a bizarre assumption to make...

Joyless is living in a neighbourhood and complaining about children, dogs and lawn mowing that are not being intrusive or interactive with you. Not choosing to live away from something you find annoying or noisy with others who feel the same way.

Have I said I’m offended? No, as well you know. Don’t extrapolate something that’s not there. I’m very happy in the knowledge that my DC are great, all round good eggs . We were all children once - more power to you if you’ve actively chosen not to have DC if you don’t want them, but they’re actually not a sub species and although this is a sure for everyone, it’s, y’know, just nice to talk about people in a pleasant way, including those who aren’t yet adults. As I said ringing the buzzer is just rude, of course.

I doubt it’s in the ‘affordable category.

a site , not a sure

I know children aren’t a sub species, I’ve got some myself. I haven’t chosen to live in a child free complex; some people have.
I wouldn’t assume the people who have need mine inflicted on them, just because I think they’re nice? You appear to think you’re providing a public service by doing so, how strange...

You did sound a bit indignant Avon. Especially the sarcastic remark about 'pesky children.'

Businesses have to adhere to the Equality Act. Age is a protected characteristic. And association is included. So for example, if I go into a cake shop and ask for a cake for my gay friend and am refused on that ground, they have discriminated against me.

How is refusing housing to someone based on them having or associating with children any different? Maternity and pregnancy are included as well so all the talk of making people move if they get pregnant is pretty awful too.

Do people really think discrimination only applies to public bodies? It applies to businesses too!

Please learn how to spell 'nice' properly

Please learn how to spell 'nice' properly

Please learn to recognise a long-running Mumsnet trope when you see one.

So are private old people's homes also discriminatory Terry.

Or complexes that specify 'Over 55s'.

Or restaurants that don't allow children under 12 after 7pm?

I would do the following:

A) speak to you management company (assuming you have one) and find out where you stand re kids in the gardens all the time. If they say tough luck, no rules about visitors you may have to suck it up although I can’t say that’s fair

B) speak to your neighbours again and ask them to keep their visitors to a particular time. Maybe speak to some other neighbours who are annoyed to get some back up. Tell them to stop the kids ringing the bell

C) re the bell - ring your neighbours bell incessantly for a while so they get the drift off why it’s annoying.

Also, this reminds me of the lady with the pool. I bet these kids don’t have a garden so the parents bring them round to play in yours. Like it’s your responsibility to provide a play area for them.

Actually, maybe the management company can tell the neighbours they’ll be increasing their fees due to extra damage the kids are inflicting?!

Refusing housing? It’s a complex built especially for people who want peace and quiet, it’s it USP, I doubt any people with multiple kids are breaking down the doors to get in; why the hell would they?
You can build a block of flats and market it whatever the hell way you want, nobody is forced to buy.
I’m quite amused at the notion of some indignant halfwit trying to claim discrimination because they want to live in that particular block and this human right is denied them because they do have children.
Who is that stupid?
Unless you’re assuming it’s a council tower block??

I’m saying that childfree complexes are ridiculous in principle but obviously you don’t like kids (what brought you to mumsnet then
Because amazingly this site is for everyone, not just parents?
Do you mention your kids on every single topic on here?

You are entitled to not be disturbed by the kids ringing your doorbell all the time and you should be able to enjoy the garden in peace.
You also shouldn't have to pay for the upkeep if they keep damaging it, i don’t think you would be unreasonable to complain about these bits.
I don’t think there is anything wrong with the kids coming over to visit, but they shouldn't be disturbing the other residents or damaging anything.
This probably isn't the best place for kids ( child free complex clearly.
You also don’t sound joyless
Whenever childless is mentioned that person is automatically assumed to be a miserable boring child hating person.
It gets boring.

No you're wrong actually

Who is wrong, oh wise one?

I'm quite amused at the notion of some indignant halfwit trying to claim discrimination because they want to live in that particular block and this human right is denied them because they do have children.
Who is that stupid?
Unless you’re assuming it’s a council tower block??

Well the whole of Canada is THAT stupid. Unless a building seeks and gets specific exclusion (so designated 55+ or seniors or housing for POC or whatever) yes, housing cannot be refused based on age/family make up (including having children) or race, religion or other protected characteristics.

Why should restaurants exclude under 12s? They can exclude based on behaviour or noise or whatever but assuming a child will be more poorly behaved than an adult... that's discrimination. Really basically.