to feel upset that they 'felt sorry for me'?

[GamoraT]

I'm a cleaner in a big train station. I didn't dream of becoming a cleaner and it's by no means my ideal job, but it's mine and I do it well. A bunch of women walked past me on my shift recently and I heard them say that they felt sorry for people like me, doing jobs like the one I do. This has stuck with me for a few days now and I feel I need to post about it. Do people really see those who are doing jobs such as mine as less? People they need to feel sorry for? I just don't know how to feel about that comment and am gutted that that's how I was categorised...

*barriers to exit, sorry

I dont feel sorry for you i admire you for being hardworking and honest. Attractive traits.
It may seem a shit job but its a job and you do it well. I wouldnt associate you to toilets or dirty work. In fact I wouldnt think anything at all other than you were a normal person x

Bluntness I’m notcomparing myself to the OP. I’m making the point that people could make snide comments to/about anyone in any job -the Royal Family, a wife of a footballer, a dentist, whatever. It’s the commenters that are the problem, not her job. They are the common denominator.

Re ‘lawyer’ - yes, I’m a qualified solicitor. I’ve worked in US firms and disliked ‘attorney’ and our US clients/counterparts found ‘lawyer’ more palatable than ‘solicitor’ is all.

I feel sorry for hospital cleaners! But I also admire people who do the job of cleaning, we need you and it's a job I'd hate to do.

I have cleaned and found it ok - nice colleagues and no stress. I certainly would not feel sorry for someone who cleans for a living if that was all the information I had to go on.

I feel sorry for people who feel trapped by their jobs, those who can't make ends meet and can't see a way forward, and those who work crazy and stressful hours (missing out on leisure time, often for no extra pay) because it is expected in their industry. None of which I would know just from seeing them at work.

I don't feel sorry for cleaners etc, but I often feel sorry for people whose work keeps them outdoors all day in scorching sun or freezing cold and rain.

I also feel sorry for the Queen, because I wouldn't want her job.

I find the comments loudly cheering cleaners, admiring them, and stating that the world wouldn't function without them a lot more patronising frankly.

I mean when the toilets were shut at London Victoria for weeks, the station didn't close down.

Its an essential job, nothing to be ashamed of, an essential service to the community but let's not go over the top either.

I mean when the toilets were shut at London Victoria for weeks, the station didn't close down

You do know cleaners clean more than the toilets eh?

It says more about them OP. Not you. They’re rude. If you weren’t working they’d moan about that.

Ha! They dont know what they are missing. I work in a petrol station and I love it! No stress. I used to work for a bank and couldn't dream of ever going back no matter the money.

Honestly op, I don't feel sorry for you. I've had some stressful jobs in my time and it was not worth it. I now have a fairly lowly admin role which is also low stress (and it's me that has to clean out meeting rooms, half eaten sandwiches all over the shop) and I don't feel sorry for myself. I don't think about work the moment I've left. I have time and energy for my family.

A friend of mine was a nurse and became so stressed and ill he became a cleaner in a school. He makes about £16k a year and loves a simple happy life.

Some people are super squeamish but I'm not and i did seriously consider becoming a self employed cleaner at one point m.

Are you happy op? If so, fuck them.

If not, you are working hard and making a difference. And you'll get something better soon, but really.... no need to feel sorry about it.

There are much much worse things. Did you know that most abattoir workers are paid per kill? Or, imagine working for a ppi cold call centre. Or selling things to people they don't need and you feel awful about. Od clean toilets over these and many more jobs any day xx

You do know cleaners clean more than the toilets eh? you don't say.

Actually, in some stations, it is a totally different shift or even a different job, and the people allocated to the toilets are not the ones who will be cleaning the concourse. In some places they are not even employed by the same company. You could compare with you employing a house cleaner and a window cleaner. They could be the same, or could be totally different entities.

Anyway the point that saying that no cleaner = nothing functioning is patronising at best.

I totally understand why you're upset and want you to know I really appreciate a clean toilet anywhere public. Thank you for what you do.

I think people often forget that all jobs have impact. They'd soon notice if you stopped doing your job.

Not sure if this comment will help you or not, but try to think about what people would say if you didn't do your job x

@HairDyedPink let’s see what would happen if every cleaner in the UK took the day off at once eh?

I bet you’d change your tune.

OP haven't read the whole thread but I get it. Most people don't like hearing anyone feels sorry for them, whatever the reason or sentiment behind it.

A neighbour once told me she felt 'so sorry' for my DC when she saw DP bringing them home from our childminder in the evening. She commented that they must be exhausted, such a shame they spend all day in childcare and I have to work etc. It made me feel really crap.

But it's all swings and roundabouts. She has told me about their 'D'H who refuses to look after their DC or do any housework . She has no say whatsoever in the financial running of the house. He does not 'allow' her to buy new clothes so she has only purchased charity or worn donated clothes for 8 years now. I'd never tell her I feel sorry for her although of course I do.

They're probably just saying it to make themselves feel better

I said I felt sorry for the cleaners in the pub ds went to the last England match as pints of beer were being chucked everywhere and they were literally opening the doors and swilling it out.
The poor cleaners the next day would have had a much harder job.

I don't think anybody is below me and I don't feel sorry for the cleaners doing their normal jobs, just when it's excessive or people that are twats and don't clean their own shit.

I don't understand this at all.

I feel grateful for the people who clean our public spaces not sorry for them

My husband said similar a couple of years ago whilst on holiday on a Greek island. I said to him, are you fecking joking?! She’s here, has the winter off, simple and non political tasks, and no bitchy office stuff, meaningless meertings and ridiculous ‘visons’. I put another face/head on for work - I’m a miserable bastard and enjoy my own company. Everyone has their niche, and contribution to society can never be compared like for like: who saves lives? The surgeon with his skill, you will your skill keeping things clean, preventing spread of bugs/vermin. I hate how society values education over end product. And there are some fucking pointless jobs too, imho

They're idiots. They should be grateful to you not pitying you.

I'm a teacher and I just love the cleaning lady who does my room. She has very difficult circumstances but always has time to say hello and ask how I am. She got one of my desks fixed for me - I e-mailed maintenance 3 times and no response, she asked a friend of hers directly who worked in maintenance and it was done the next day! At Xmas we had a collection for her as she does live in financially difficult circumstances - one person gave it to her with a card - we made no fuss as we felt she may be embarrassed. The gift was meant in a nice way and was an appreciation for the work she does for us all year.

In a different context, my DH's wealthy friend (both DC at private school) made a comment outside my old school 'what sort of education would you get here?'. I did view him differently after and wondered how he viewed me teaching there!

OP, I always used to see the train cleaners when I was getting my train home and TBH envied them what seemed to me to be stress free job-whether it really was I dont know, but there was always plenty of them and they seemed to be waiting for the trains to come in to clean (no toilets on them) and talking mainly. I wondered how much they got paid and whether I would enjoy it! (I was in a high stress job at the time)

I never feel sorry for the cleaners at my work.

Tbh, we have a giggle with the cleaners and chat with them. One lady shines the silver beautifully, something I couldn’t do myself, as it’s a patient skill.

It could be because my own dm was a cleaner many moons ago, but I wouldn’t ‘feel sorry’ for a cleaner.

It’s another job surely 🤷🏼‍♀️

I do feel sorry for the fat berg people. That to me is the worst job I could think of.