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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Hairless foofs

999 replies

Ginismyfriendx · 06/07/2018 01:02

So can't sleep and watching naked attraction (please do judge me, I deserve it)
Are completely bare foofs a thing now? Having had a nasty experience of an ingrown hair from shaving bikini line (which required anti-biotics) why go through that? Nevermind the faff. Who want's an evening shadow on their lady bits?
All for a bit of pruning, but uprooting?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
TornFromTheInside · 08/07/2018 19:19

I think making love to a lady with a curly vulva would drive me round the bend

CosyLulu · 08/07/2018 19:20

AdultHumanFemale yes!

NotAsGreenAsCabbageLooking · 08/07/2018 19:23

Why is the response to ‘I prefer hairless as I feel cleaner’ usually to wash more? I know some posters have written it in quite an antagonising way, but why is the assumption that if you are hair removing to feel clean then you are not washing.

Personally, hair does make me feel dirtier/smellier.

I wash a lot, I’m pretty sure I actually don’t smell.. but I still feel smelly when I have hair.

Advicewouldbelovelyta · 08/07/2018 19:30

It physically hurts if I don't shave it all off

Thefourmuskateers · 08/07/2018 19:30

Haha no I don’t, I just hadnt shaved for a few months because I couldnt be bothered. I noticed in this heat that it was getting more smelly (sorry 😨) and decided to take it off.

bellinisurge · 08/07/2018 19:31

So, shaving stops you from sweating in the heatHmm. Interesting.

TornFromTheInside · 08/07/2018 19:36

Removing hair won't stop you sweating less. But it can make some feel like it does, or more comfortable.

Joey7t8 · 08/07/2018 19:53

Hair doesn’t make you sweat, but it does tend to hold the smell.

Thefourmuskateers · 08/07/2018 19:59

Well that’s what it’ll be then. Definitely not pleasant, but it was a full on bush 😂 maybe a strip or something would be better but my ex’s have both found them funny 🤦🏻‍♀️

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 08/07/2018 20:01

What is the actual objective of this thread? The hair-removers are most likely going to carry on doing that, because they prefer it. Regardless of whether other women think that they're doing it for porn or male-preference reasons. They'll have their own reasons for doing it.

I'm convinced that the women posting on this thread have their own pubic hair in mind when they post, not considering that it comes in various textures, thicknesses, growth patterns, etc., coupled with periods, sports, swimming and other factors that are taken into account by individuals.

I've seen posts (not on this thread) from ardent hair-keepers who remove hair from legs and underarms because they feel pressurised to do it. Those same women criticise other women who take it further and remove their pubic hair. How is that not hypocritical?

I've taken on board that some posters feel 'got at' because of posters saying that removing their pubic hair makes them feel cleaner. It's not a dig at anybody else but I can see that it would make some women feel that it is. I don't know what can be done about that? Should we just stop talking about it then? So that nobody feels 'got at'?

Some of the comments on this thread about 'pre-pubescence' are really quite offensive. The posters making them possibly don't mean them to be but they're not concerned when it's picked up so perhaps it's not that much of an issue for them regardless of whether it upsets other posters. I haven't appreciated those comments and I find it really difficult to understand why the posters making them don't see that it's offensive. Ditto the washing comments. Why make those?

I don't shave; I don't get on with it. I get waxed. I like the result, cleaning is certainly easier. I never felt dirty or unhygienic with hair but I will say that all of the comments I had about my underarm and leg hair when I had it as a young woman, were from other women. Never a comment from men. Why is that?

Women seem to be under pressure from the porn industry to remove hair OR not have access to sex with men who don't like it. What's so difficult about looking at it from the other side, that if a man/woman doesn't like the way you are (however that is) that he/she just doesn't get to have sex with you and it's his/her loss? That is what I'm going to be teaching my children - not to accept this crap from men or women, that they're great the way they are and accepted for the way they are, that all body shapes and grooming is normal and acceptable. Mostly, that they should never feel pressure from anybody to change how their body looks.

I've spotted a couple of comments that came in earlier that a 'woman's body is political'. What does that even mean and are women actually accepting of this? I can understand the gender pressure that's currently raging and that seems just so much more important than hair removal.

This thread hasn't really challenged me or made me think more because I've always been thinking about this but I'm genuinely interested in finding some common ground if it's there at all.

SchnitzelVonKrumm · 08/07/2018 20:01

Young/mid-teen DDs and their cool mates are depilation refuseniks (legs and armpits too). Like tattoos, the Kardashian/porn look is seen as unspeakably naff and suburban.

JacquesHammer · 08/07/2018 20:10

Young/mid-teen DDs and their cool mates are depilation refuseniks (legs and armpits too). Like tattoos, the Kardashian/porn look is seen as unspeakably naff and suburban

😂😂

Stoveding · 08/07/2018 20:14

How much would it cost to get a permanently hairless foof?

TornFromTheInside · 08/07/2018 20:20

You'd have to be a million hair ;-)

PortiaCastis · 08/07/2018 20:23
Grin
TornFromTheInside · 08/07/2018 20:39

Hairless Whispers

I feel so unsmooth
As I his my wand and lead him to my jungle
As my pubis dies, something in your eyes
Calls to mind removal cream
And hairy snatch good-byes

I'm never gonna shave again
Got my Veet, ain't got no curlies
Though it's easy to pluck ends
The pain is not so cool

Should've known better than to Veet my end
The pain is just like eyes with jizz in
So I'm never gonna smooth again
A hairy muff will do ooh ooh

TornFromTheInside · 08/07/2018 20:40

*take his wand grrr

TornFromTheInside · 08/07/2018 20:41

Apologies for errors - it was written off the cuff muff

NotAsGreenAsCabbageLooking · 08/07/2018 20:41

Eyes with jizz in are quite painful! 😂😂

Grandmaswagsbag · 08/07/2018 20:55

What's so difficult about looking at it from the other side, that if a man/woman doesn't like the way you are (however that is) that he/she just doesn't get to have sex with you and it's his/her loss?

If it genuinely was that simple I don’t think anyone would be here arguing. I don’t particularly buy the whole influenced by porn/prepubescent argument myself (I don’t think most women are trying to look like a porn star and base their grooming regimes around it) but what’s changed over recent years is the expectation that women will just be hairless. Men (especially younger) seem to go around with some sort of entitlement to police women’s bodies before their deemed worthy to shag (agree this isn’t just pube related). Perfect example Earlier in the thread of the teen who had her pictures distributed. Why should an adult woman having pubes be noteworthy? Why should it be newsworthy when a celebrity steps out with visible underarm hair? When something becomes expected it gets a bit more complex than simple personal choice doesn’t it ? I can’t believe you can’t see that. To go back to the OP, I’ve watched a fair few episodes of naked attraction (shameful I know) and they showed a range of different body types, sizes, ethnicities which was great. But I did notice every single woman in every single episode I watched was pubeless. If it was a simple as personal choice you would expect it to be as random as which haircuts/colours people have wouldn’t you?

TornFromTheInside · 08/07/2018 21:00

What's so difficult about looking at it from the other side

I tried that, but got distracted by the bum hole.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 08/07/2018 21:19

Grandmaswagsbags, Perhaps it's because I'm older? I don't know but I suspect that when I was a teen, hair removal was limited to the 'bits you can see' in a swimming costume. I remember legs and underarms being questioned if they were hairy but as I said, these were women being pointed. Pubic hair removal (I don't think) was so much of a 'thing' back then (late 80s).

I've never watched Naked Attraction but I get the gist from your post. It's really sad if it isn't a question of personal choice. I don't know what that's like as I've never discussed it - not with boyfriends, not with my husband, it's just what I did/do and I can't recall it ever being mentioned. Perhaps it's talked about more as it's become more mainstream? More what many if not most women do (to some extent)? I take your point about personal choice in that it would be a fairly random distribution of characteristics as well as preference even?

I don't think this thread is representative of the female population as, if what many posters are saying is true - at both ends of the age spectrum - older and younger, women are now shying away from removing pubic hair and are doing so for feminist reasons.

For myself, I remember shaving my legs (badly) at age 11 when I started secondary school - then my underarms. Being told off by my mother that the hair would grow back thick and black, (I'm blonde) yet being scrutinised by my female classmates and any girl who sported any kind of body hair was really picked on.

If anything, it is that which shaped my hair removal practices and made me a bit suspicious of the motives of other women when they comment on it. In fact, I'm pretty sure that this is where my hair removal has come from - it's just the method has changed - from shaving (not good for me), to depilatory creams (ok but they stink) - to waxing when I started having the disposable income to do it regularly.

I totally do understand that young men now feel entitlement to dictate how a woman's body 'should be' and I suspect that it's not just young men either - the only difference being that younger women are perhaps less sure of themselves than an older woman would be?

It really is difficult and as a parent myself I know that I have a responsibility to ensure that my children do not feel obliged to 'follow the crowd' (in anything, really) and that they feel happy and confident in their own bodies. I never did but truly, that wasn't down to porn - or boys/men - but other women.

TornFromTheInside · 08/07/2018 21:32

When I was prepubescent, to reach puberty and have hair was something to signify you were starting to become a man. It was looked forward to, and in many ways celebrated as a rite of passage. A hairy chest, needing to shave (or could grow a beard) etc.
It was part of a natural growing up process.

A girl with pubic hair and breasts was becoming a woman, and for a boy, that was attractive too. A reasonably common fantasy of an older woman was pubic hair - because it was feminine, womanly.

Sometime in the 80's pubic styling started to happen again - landing strips, neater trims etc. Then it became less and less hair.
The same trend happened with men, and a lot more women started to criticise hairy men. Hairy chests were less popular, and there was a much greater demand for male waxing.

A whole society didn't all decide en masse to change. Something persuaded them. That something was in part pornography, and the more widely publicised marketing material for men and women - Both men and women needed to be smooth to be sexy, and on the whole, society bought it, hook line and sinker.

I 'choose' to drive a certain car. I 'choose' to wear certain clothing, I 'choose' to shave or not shave, but it would be foolish of me to claim I'm not influenced by the rest of society. It's why I'm not wearing flares anymore, or shell suits.
What we do with our pubic hair is hugely influenced by the rest of society just as much as our choice of fashion.
It's impossible to pinpoint individuals, as everybody believes their choice is their own, but it's irrefutable that we have a herd-like behaviour.

AdultHumanFemale · 08/07/2018 22:58

Witch , I agree with you that women are just as keen to police women's bodies, but I put this down to internalised misogyny as a result of the pervasive pressure of patriarchal expectation. It is a knee-jerk reaction in response to deep societal shaming, in my opinion. Isn't it funny how we view things so differently, because I completely agree with Bertrand in that I can't see how a woman's body wouldn't be political.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 08/07/2018 23:38

AdultHumanFemale Now that I hadn't thought of, it makes absolute sense to me. I would so love it though if women just stood united together, against patriarchal expectation and stipulation. We'd be unbeatable.

I don't understand the politics of woman's body but I'm not dismissing that this exists and I do know that Bertand is hugely.