Bridesmaid won't dye her hair

[elcarmen]

My bridesmaid has dyed her hair this week a horrible pink colour and I am getting married next saturday. Am i being unreasonable to ask her to dye it back or uninvite her from the wedding?

For context she is incredibly self-centered and always wants the attention to be focused on herself and I think she has done it just to stick out in the photos.

I like red dresses FWIW

Skaross
If that were the case no need for the sarcasm eh! .

Why the hell are you friends with this woman OP?

She's a twat. Tell her if she doesn't dye her hair more natural then she's not being a bridesmaid.

Call her fucking bluff.

she announced her pregnancy at my engagement party

You have to admire the planning that must have gone for that one!

@jollyoldsoul because some school rules suck.😬

Obviously it will look terrible but if you have decent photographer they will have no problem fixing it in the photos.

🤣🤣 the issue isn't her hair then it's the fact that you don't appear to like each other at all. why are you friends?

It's her wedding day. The world should revolve around her and her DH.

What? Since when? It’s a wedding, they aren’t being crowned king and queen of all they survey! There will be umpteen other things happening that day in peoples lives. The purpose of a wedding is to get married, you invite people you like so they can celebrate your lovely occasion. It is not so people can treat you like a 3 year old princess and make the whole day about you. If you’re getting married so you have one day that revolves around you then you’re too young to be married. Only adults can get married.

Mummy if there was ever a need for sarcasm it's this thread!

But i don't dislike her she's my oldest and dearest friend

Or so i thought

A sudden change out of the blue, completely against her character?
If she were my friend, I’d be checking that everything is okay for her... people tend to make big changes when ‘reinventing’ themselves or coping with change.
Pick up the phone and ask her how she is, and give her a break from being so involved in your wedding

Schools still haven't moved on and according to this thread neither have alot of women.

I have purple hair, I love unnatural hair colours. OTOH I wouldn't dye my hair a pink colour after I'd been asked to be a bridesmaid for someone while I had my natural hair colour, and who has red dresses; someone who is clearly more conservative.

Me refreshing the page waiting for new comments...

Can she not come to the wedding but not be a bridesmaid? Then she won't clash with the bridesmaid dress, won't be in as many photos, etc.

I think red dresses can be lovely. Those who criticised them are very rude.

I would be irritated if my bridesmaid done this. Don't think there is any point saying anything as it's giving the drama she wants.

As you have text you really have to decide what you want to do. Accept her hair colour and don't let it bother you. Or if you will be irritated by it on the day then don't let her come. But that probably is the end of the friendship.

Shit situation OP. Hope you manage to resolve it somehow.

But i don't dislike her she's my oldest and dearest friend

Really?

For context she is incredibly self-centered and always wants the attention to be focused on herself

She has form for this because she's always doing odd things that i cant decide if its a coincidence or if shes doing it to mess with my head

If you’re getting married so you have one day that revolves around you then you’re too young to be married. Only adults can get married.

I am an adult, thanks. I don't see what's so wrong about the bride being the focus of the day.

Does nobody think anything bad about their friends?

Haven’t RTFT as I was scrolling through to read all the OP’s posts and the reply to her text.
OP, you will still be the star of your wedding.
Your friend sounds very self-centred but I’m sure she dyed her hair pink because it’s a thing and didn’t give your wedding a moment’s thought.
If you want her there I suggest you text an apology saying that you overreacted and are feeling a bit stressed, and sorry for being a bridezilla. Unless you don’t really want her there in which case ignore her.

Ok. I think I'm with you, OP - sounds like pink heaired friend has "issues" of some sort with you. Because - let's face it - even if this was just something her friend decided to do for herself, you can bet she didn't just forget about the wedding. It seems pretty calculated to me. As others have said, you can't do anything about it; she's a grown woman and it's her own decision. What you do have the power to control is your own reaction to this. It sounds like she wants some sort of reaction from you. Don't give it. Just carry on and enjoy your day in the full knowledge that you aren't going to be the person looking rather peculiar in the photos. (And, as a pp has said, black and white photography will be your friend if you want one with the bridesmaids!)

OP: AIBU?

90per cent of MN: Yes, very.

OP: Ignores 90 per cent. Carries on despite advice. Friend now doesn't want to wedding.

90 per cent of MN: [Hmm]

There are some super laid back ex-brides on here, I'd have been massively pissed off as the stress before a wedding is immense and small things like this can send you over the edge, but at the same time having had the big day I know that on the day you will be so happy that her pink hair will be irrelevant.

There are some super laid back ex-brides on here,

Either that or a load of goady pisstakers who have had too much sun!

This is brilliant. Comedy gold. A prime example of Bridezilla, who is objecting to comments by behaving like a Prima Donna.

OP, it's one day to celebrate your love and commitment to each other. What other people wear or how they have their hair affects absolutely nothing.
Pop a couple of calms.