Bridesmaid won't dye her hair

[elcarmen]

My bridesmaid has dyed her hair this week a horrible pink colour and I am getting married next saturday. Am i being unreasonable to ask her to dye it back or uninvite her from the wedding?

For context she is incredibly self-centered and always wants the attention to be focused on herself and I think she has done it just to stick out in the photos.

Well I wasn't pissed off, because I don't have the right to dictate what a adult does with their own body

OP you haven’t answered my question. You say she has form for
This - can you give any examples?

Also you say she’s not seeing it from your perspective but your not seeing it from hers either

Oh please. Dramatic much? Pink hair vs nudity. Trainers vs nudity. Jeans vs nudity. Do get a grip dear. The examples you cite will NEVER happen.

Dramatic much? You were the one saying how completely unacceptable it was to police what people wear. Don’t make melodramatic statements if you don’t have the courage of your convictions.

What kind of dumb fuck analogy is that?

Well, clearly too difficult for you to grasp, I accept.

She sounds incredibly self centred to dye her hair an outlandish colour a week before being a bridesmaid. She sounds like a selfish attention seeker.

It IS unacceptable to police what people WEAR!

If they were nude they wouldn’t be wearing anything.

Pink hair isn’t compatible to nudity.

HTH

Pink hair isn’t compatible to nudity

I think you’ll find pink hair is perfectly compatible with nudity. Unless by nudity you mean not only stripped of all clothes but shaved of all body hair also.

I would be annoyed but I wouldn’t show it.

I’d make an oh-so-sweet comment about how it was a shame she didn’t wait until after the wedding because pink and red look so tacky together.

I’d make sure she was on the end of some photos for cropping possibilities, and entirely excluded from many simply saying, “I think this one will look nicer with just best man and maid of honour.”

I’d be seeing a lot less of her after the wedding too.

Yabu to ask her to change her physical appearance. But I suspect she knows this, and it’s exactly why she did it.

Oh, I forgot to be passively aggressively patronising.

HTH.

Mummyoflittledragons The point I was making was that although you may feel the world recolves around you for your wedding it doesn't. Shit happens, you deal with it and you celebrate the start of married life with someone you truly love. Nothing else matters.

I don't think pink hair with red looks that bad?

But yes YABVU and if I was her I wouldn't want to be at your wedding anyway you sound most unpleasant

You can 'police' what they wear when you choose it, and likely buy it. Being told what to wear is a pretty big part of being a bridesmaid. 🙄

It really doesn't matter OP.
Your friendship with her matters far more.

@NotTakenUsername

I’d make an oh-so-sweet comment about how it was a shame she didn’t wait until after the wedding because pink and red look so tacky together

Friend: Yeah, I know it's a real shame. If you hadn't picked such a horrible, outdated colour for your bridesmaid dresses then it wouldn't look so shit

I think you'll find that you still can't go to school with pink hair in most places. College maybe.

Well obviously, otherwise teachers wouldn't have said it to me in the 00's. The point is the mentality that girls should have natural and uniform hair is like something from the 1950's. Schools still haven't moved on and according to this thread neither have alot of women.

She has form for this because she's always doing odd things that i cant decide if its a coincidence or if shes doing it to mess with my head for example:

• she named her kitten after my ex-boyfriend after we broke up
• she announced her pregnancy at my engagement party

Actually you’re right, it is compatible, I’ll agree with you there

However, flashing, which is what your describing (I.e your boss calls you in to his/her office and they’re naked), is indecent assault and indecent assault is NOT comparilble to someone turning up to a a wedding with pink hair. It’s kind of a bit sick to think that it might be.

I've changed mine from teal to purple so I don't clash with the bridesmaids dress. Friend (bride) certainly didn't expect that, though. I've had alternative hair colour for about three years, though. YABU.

The girls and boys at our local academy seem to be allowed, I've seen green and pink hair, and one of the teachers has bright pink hair. Maybe it depends on the school.

So people will slag off my bridesmaids dresses but won't slag off my newly pink haired bridesmaid?

I do think you are ridiculous to be bothered about someone dying her hair before a party frankly, but I don't get the comments about red dresses. They can be gorgeous. I am sure women do wear red dresses in 2018 I just bought one in the Coast sales

Aarrrgghh I'm drowning in the drip feed

Do people honestly believe someone would go the lengths and expense of bleaching their hair solely to piss off a 'friend'? I don't buy it.

OP you say she hasn't coloured her hair for years. What colours did she used to go? Is it possible she couldn't afford to/had no time/energy to care for her hair and has a made an extra effort to look nice for your wedding?

The 'bright' pink won't be bright for long. My daughter uses fashion colours religiously, they are only vibrant for the first few washes.

By next Saturday, it will look more like this

I suspect your friend or her hairdresser knows this. Whenever DD asks me for pastel hair for holidays or occasions we always pick a bolder colour and let it fade. The ones that go on pastel last about a second before they're gone completely.

she named her kitten after my ex-boyfriend after we broke up
she announced her pregnancy at my engagement party

Christ. How old are both of you, eleven?

GROW UP.

If pink hair is so acceptable, why isn't it allowed in school? It's considered an extreme hair style then.

Howling @ she named her kitten after my ex boyfriend was the moggy called wanker?

HurtyBurty - have you gone and got a bit over invested?