DP went mad at me for getting the days wrong.

[BillieTee]

We had something planned for tomorrow. I got the dates mixed up. Turns out it was today. It was a free event and there's a very similar (if not better) one on tomorrow. I told him I was really sorry and that it was a completely innocent mistake. I expected him to be annoyed but not to completely blow up at me.

He called me an idiot, told me his DC was looking forward to it, told me I need to be more organised and get my shit together. I'm 22 weeks pregnant and have a lot on my mind and got this one thing wrong. AIBU to feel hurt by his reaction? Or do I really need to get my shit together? I'm usually the organised one, I just made a mistake and he for some reason went nuts.

Wow, that reaction is really off. If he's normally nice then I'd maybe calmly ask him if he's feeling ok given his totally unreasonable reaction, otherwise I'd be going a bit nuts back frankly!

He's a dick. If there's a similar event tomorrow his DC won't know the difference and will enjoy it regardless. Please don't tolerate this behaviour.

Are you with the right man?

How about he gets more organized rather than blaming you?

He's never blown up at me before now. His DC has been talking about it all weekend, and I just have no idea where this came from. Can only think he's worried about disappointing DC

Wow...he sounds a prince. Are you his mother? His PA? Doesn't he have a calendar? How are you responsible for his DC?

I think he should be looking after you and not being so unreasonable. Everyone makes mistakes, it's not the end of the world. Is he always this awful?

@LordNibbler I've never had a reaction like this from him in the years we have been together until today.

No, he’s a turd. We (me, two kids, their father) once travelled about half an hour to a castle five minutes outside Maidstone - just as we were turning into the gates, I realized I’d left the annual passes at home. I still hear about that today but, interestingly, we’re not allowed to touch on the fact that he took us to Paultons Park a whole week late for a ‘two days in the park, overnight stay’ thing, and I had to put park entry and a hotel on my cc because all my kids wanted was an overnight stay in a bloody Trusthouse Forte with a pool, and a buffet-style breakfast.

It's common for domestic abuse to start in pregnancy. Be aware. Don't let him gaslight you, making out plans etc are all up to you. Neither of you knew it was today, it's clearly as much his "fault" as yours, as well as being not a big deal as you can still go to one tomorrow. I would be concerned he is starting to push the boundaries of unacceptable behaviour and it'll only get worse from here.

I don't think this is the start of domestic abuse. But it's good to know that people can change during pregnancy and see that mentioned quite a lot on mn. I just have no idea where this reaction came from. Good to know IANBU in being upset about it however.

If his kids were looking forward to it so much then how come HE didn't know when it was?!
Grown ups get frustrated or irritated. Even cross sometimes but they don't blow up at someone for making a mistake.

He's now gone out and I have no idea where he's gone.

why is it your job to be the activity oracle?

He sounds like an arsehole. Where are the children?

So when did it become your job to be the keeper of all knowledge of events?

If he wanted to take his DC then he should have checked when it was on. Is your name Google OP?

He's only got one DC. DC is in bed. I'm hoping he's just nipped to the shop and not told me because he's in a mood. No idea what's going on. He's left his phone.

Pregnancy can make you forget stuff. I have proper baby brain and usually am crazy organised.
Don't put up with him being rude. Just tell him he could have remembered and your going to x instead

Wankbadger

Um, I am a little perturbed by your last post - has he ever stormed off/ blown up at anyone else you know? SHop assistant or similar?

can I pry and ask if the DC’s mother is still around? Are they amicable?

All a bit twitchy for me with an experience of DV.

Why didn't he take his child without you? Why did you have to be there? Seems very odd why he is so angry.

Are you going tomorrow instead?

Wow charming!!! If his dc were that excited why couldn’t he remember to take them, why is it down to you.

Two things here, his reaction is competent over the top, and secondly why is it your fault, can he not organise days out?

I'm usually Uber organised too. I'm also usually really clean and tidy. My house is disgusting because I just don't have the time or energy to clean it as I spend every second sleeping, trying to relax or at work doing a 50 hour week! Pregnancy changes people. Worried about where DP has gone and that this is going to become commonplace.

@lborgia he doesn't speak to his mum. They don't get on, but she is isolated from his whole family and doesn't get on with any of them. It's her doing and I don't think they've spoken for years.
He's only ever blown up at someone once. It was a woman who drove past him, too close and knocked his wing mirror. That was a couple of years ago but he did to completely OTT nuts. I remember brushing it off and putting it down to him having a brand new car. It's easy to put these things to the back of your mind when they are one off occurrences.

Why isn't HE cleaning the fucking house? 50 hour work week and you're pregnant and tired - and he strops off about an event for HIS DC that you forgot? Why didn't HE sort it?