DP went mad at me for getting the days wrong.

[BillieTee]

We had something planned for tomorrow. I got the dates mixed up. Turns out it was today. It was a free event and there's a very similar (if not better) one on tomorrow. I told him I was really sorry and that it was a completely innocent mistake. I expected him to be annoyed but not to completely blow up at me.

He called me an idiot, told me his DC was looking forward to it, told me I need to be more organised and get my shit together. I'm 22 weeks pregnant and have a lot on my mind and got this one thing wrong. AIBU to feel hurt by his reaction? Or do I really need to get my shit together? I'm usually the organised one, I just made a mistake and he for some reason went nuts.

At this point, I'd be sodding furious. Not just at him blowing up, but at this childish disappearing act.

He'd better have gone to buy you flowers, OP!

As he knew it was on, and he was going to take his child, why didn't he check dates himself? He's the one who needs to get organised.

@Arum51 he definitely won't be buying me flowers, I can tell you that for sure

My house is disgusting because

Why do you need to explain why your house looks the way it looks, and more importantly why isn't DP helping you?!?
I'm sorry to say this but it sounds as if his true colours are coming out!

Did he need you to drive all of you there? If he was that bothered about taking his kids, he’d have taken them anyway surely, even if you didn’t want to join them or were busy? I hope he didn’t shout at you in front of the DC.

@girlywhirly he didn't shout in front of DC. Though DC was in bed next door and wouldn't be surprised if DC heard.

These are red flags to me, first it started as one off things, then I got to 5 months and it was every time I did something wrong, then by time DD was 4 months he was waking me up at 5am screaming at me. Just keep it in mind.

@Queenofthestress thank you and so sorry to hear that

OK, this is starting to sound a bit bigger than the initial post would suggest. WIhtout giving you more to fret about, do you know, truly, that it’s all her fault? Does the DC seem relaxed and happy about their other home life?

I’m not sure why the mother should be still in contact with your DP’s family, have you actually met her?

And as for “he won’t be being me flowers, I can definitely tell you that”.. what does that mean?

The state of “your” house. Do you not actually live together? Has he complained about it? Sounds a tiny bit as if you’re treading on eggshells, trying to keep everything perfect?

Sorry, this is more a relationships thing really....

That was the last time he ever did that, just be careful please, don't end up in the same situation I did

If there's aomething similar tomorrow-why not just tell his kid that it's tomorrow & you'll be going then?

Why didn't he know that it was today if it was important to his kid to go?

He has told you exactly who he is, sadly you are wearing blinkers.

Isn't he lucky he's got you to clean up the house and keep his diary and look after his child while he storms off?

Have a think about this one, OP.

This isn’t good. It’s not fair on the DC or you for DP to behave this way. I wonder if something has happened that he can’t tell you about, such as he’s in debt or has lost his job?

I’m disgusted that he doesn’t help you at home, he lives there too and makes mess so he should help. He wants to think long and hard about how his DC is affected as well as you.

@lborgia I thought you meant his mother! He doesn't get on all the time with DC mother but they're completely amicable and no issues that I'm aware of. He's still not back. Feel sick to my stomach.

he's a CREEP

OP, you are not answering any of the posts asking

1. why is it YOUR responsibility to organise the day for HIS child.
2. why is it YOU doing the cleaning?

You seem paranoid about whether YABU and have genuinely upset him, always HIS feelings. It's not your responsibility to satisfy him. How about you?

Hi OP. The incident with the wing mirror was the one you know about. There will have been others. Run. Like. Fuck.

He should be cleaning the house. You're fucking pregnant with his baby. You and they deserve better from him than this. I think that you should let him know that that's the case. And if you argue, and he frightens you, you go. Hotel, anywhere.

If the event was important to him and his DC then he should have taken it upon himself to find out when it was.

Cock ups happen, how you react to them is the important bit and your DP has shown his true, unpleasant colours.

Did he ask you if you minded babysitting his child while he went out?

Why did they get divorced?

OK, I’ve just seen what the time is. I really think you need to try and detach from the fact that he has gone out. Can you have a cup of tea, a cool bath/shower, and try and get some rest/sleep?

It’s really quite pointless to become even more exhausted by waiting up for him when you should be looking after yourself.

Please, look after yourself.

I wouldn't worry about him.
He is in a mood amd decided to go out. Good! At least he isn't in the house moaning at you or giving you the silence treatment.

The fact he hasn’t steeped up to do some cleaning in the house is crap.
Insulting you and shouting for an honest mistake is not acceptable. Esp when this is something HE should be organising if it’s about doing something for his ds.
Making it a huge issue when it’s not is.. well crap (see the fact you can just go tomorrow instead!)
Leaving wo telling you wher he is going whilst making sure you can’t contact him. Well he is having a strop like a 7yo.

I think he has a lot of growing up to do.

Baby brain, starts with your first pregnancy and lasts until the menopause, oh yeah that plays with your head too.

He sounds like an enormous cunt. No wonder he’s annoyed; you haven’t been cleaning his fucking house for him AND you messed up his planned (by you) activity. He must be royally miffed that his unpaid staff member isn’t doing what he wants .