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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To steal a baby name?

287 replies

Maggie24715 · 28/06/2018 20:50

My husbands cousin is TTC and we were chatting about baby names. I'm 6 months pregnant and love the baby name she's chosen.
Would I be the worst in the world to steal it?
They live at the other end of the country so we only see them at family weddings - but they are a close family with lots of FB groups etc.

OP posts:
littlemissdynamite · 28/06/2018 22:56

@Bluebird3 Not keen on most of your names either.

If the OP wants to use the name Georgia she should use it.

lazyminimoo · 28/06/2018 22:57

I wouldnt do it even if I wished I could just wouldnt like to upset someone Id have to see every so often , she might be quite upset with you an it would cause a bad atmosphere everytime you see her

littlemissdynamite · 28/06/2018 22:57

I mean Georgie.

NotUmbongoUnchained · 28/06/2018 22:57

I would never speak to you again if you did this to me

lizzie1970a · 28/06/2018 22:57

I think it too unusual to do. It's not unheard of but it's not that usual. If it was George for a boy then I think you could get away with saying we also like that name as there'll be loads of them anyway. Georgie is more specific. Georgia was popular for a while but Georgie is more unusual. It's definitely pinching their idea.

NoCureForLove · 28/06/2018 22:57

Good to know LMD, good to know.

Lalliella · 28/06/2018 22:57

Massively shitty. Don’t do it. It’d be even worse if they never manage to conceive and there you are with the little Georgie that they’ll never have. How could you even think is it NU, what sort of person are you?

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 28/06/2018 22:57

I really don’t understand the indignation. Why does it make a difference what name you choose if a cousin who you see maybe annually has a kid with the same name?

If you do decide you absolutely must use it, I would do as pp suggest and at least let her know beforehand as clearly people have very strong views!

LipstickHandbagCoffee · 28/06/2018 22:58

Never talk again? A measured response then. No sense of getting it all out of proportion

littlemissdynamite · 28/06/2018 23:00

WOW, the over reactions and drama llamas on here!!!

PMSL.

If you're daft enough to share the name you are going to give your baby, then you deserve to have it nicked.

NO-ONE was told the name of our kids til a couple of days AFTER THEY WERE BORN.

If you tell people before you even start trying, then you only have yourself to blame.

Quite honestly, anyone who says they would disown me and never speak to me again if I 'stole' the name they had chosen for their unborn child, can just fuck off anyway, as I don't need that kind of drama queen in my life.

bluebird3 · 28/06/2018 23:00

OP I think you'd be better off starting a thread in Baby Names. Most haven't read that you have decided not to use it and I have to say this is one of the least friendly threads I've seen on mn.

Elspeth12345 · 28/06/2018 23:01

I don't think it's unreasonable because the babies won't even be first cousins and will hardly ever see each other.

You could always tell your DH's cousin that you love the name so much that you'd like to use it. Maybe your child could also have a different nickname and then you can use that at family gatherings?

Crunchymum · 28/06/2018 23:05

Could you use a variation? Georgia / Georgina?

It's bad form to use a name you know someone close to you loves but it's also bad form [IMO] to be naming a baby / telling people the name when you are struggling to conceive. The name if your future baby is the least of your worries when you can't get pregnant (or stay pregnant - Which was my problem!!)

Storminateapot · 28/06/2018 23:08

My brother and his wife started TTC their second child before I did & were quite keen for a boy, already having their daughter. We had a conversation about baby names and he told me the name they had chosen for when/if they had a boy. It's a lovely name and had been in my shortlist too when my eldest daughter was born.

So I started TTC about a year later, they were still struggling and, being very lucky, I conceived twin boys straight away. The one name I knew I now could not use for my boys was the chosen name, even though I probably would have used it without that knowledge. Just couldn't do that to my lovely bro & sil, talk about adding insult to injury!

As it happened they did conceive after a few more years. A girl - so little 'x name' never existed for either of us.

I don't regret my decision to rule that name out though.

Mortallie · 28/06/2018 23:11

I am no help s my DD is a Georgia/Georgie.

But I am of the opinion that no one owns a name. Name your DD what you want to name her. You never know, she might be born and you realise that Georgie doesn't actually suit her.

Teggun · 28/06/2018 23:18

Ffs people. OP has taken on board the specific situation of a couple ttc .
Good decision OP and good luck finding a name you like

bluemoonchances · 28/06/2018 23:18

Crunch mum guess it's just a case of everyone deals with things differently. We've been TTC for 8 years. After that amount of time all close friends and family know our struggles as we talk openly about it. Why should we hid it like a dirty secret after all? In those conversations that happen over the years I've mentioned that I'd call my baby X if I'm ever lucky enough to have a girl. Over the years X has become the baby I'll never have. So when close friend said they were thinking about using X I pretended not to be bothered so as not to upset them or influence their decision, but inside it killed me as I knew I'd look at that baby and be gutted that I couldn't manage to get that far.

So yes it may just be a name to some, and yes there's no law against OP using it, but I'm glad OP has been sensitive to how it may effect the other woman. Good for you OP xx

PuddlesOfBud · 28/06/2018 23:33

A purse,bag,identity can be stolen and are defined by belonging to an individual Name can’t be stolen it’s not a possession. A name doesn’t have ownershipNames have significance & meaning but that doesn’t mean name can’t be replicated

A story isn't a possesion.

BUt if you told me you met your husband while backpacking in Australia in a Dive shop called Dave's Dives and I repeated it as my story, i'd still look fucking mental.

pandarific · 28/06/2018 23:34

How about Frederica, Freddie for short? Cute?

PuddlesOfBud · 28/06/2018 23:38

WHat about Bobby OP?

NobodysMot · 28/06/2018 23:50

Bobby, Billy or Richie. All have the same vibe

PuddlesOfBud · 28/06/2018 23:57

Billy is cute. What about Lolly?

littlemissdynamite · 29/06/2018 00:33

Lolly and Frederica ???

What about Jasperina, Archibaldette? Frogmella? Smegaleena?

Pollywollydoodle? That's a cute name.

IlikemyTeahot · 29/06/2018 00:58

Reverse?

Either way yes very shitty and would be very dissapointed with a friend for that.

PuddlesOfBud · 29/06/2018 01:08

Lovely names Littlemissdynamite but they don't really go with the name the Op is interested in. You are aware of course that Frederica is actually a real name unlike Archibaldette though?