to change DD's school & move away to have a life separate from DM?

[YesSheCan]

Namechange as too much personal info on previous thread, now deleted.

Well done

Youve done mighty good Yes.

OP i have followed this throughout and have to say well done.

Yeah well done!!

Hmm time to change DDs number and keep her old one on a cheap 2nd phone...

Does your dm kmow where you are moving to? If not I would be very wary of the phone. Is there a gps or find my friends app?

DM has a smartphone or DD has?

If it's DM, l don't understand the significance or concern in her having one.

Hmmm because DM was too incapable before to use anything (feigned helplessness) and possibly bribe DD that she can have it if she does x y z..

DM now has a smartphone. DD already has one but does not have a SIM yet - she uses phone more like a mini tablet. But there are plenty of messaging platforms that can he used without SIM.

No, DM does not know new address.

De-lurking to say congratulations to you and your dd on your move. Have been watching your threads with admiration for your patience and level headedness. Hope that comes over as I mean it and not patronizing.

No not patronising at all. Thank you. The patience and levelheadedness have by no means been constant

YesSheBloodyCan!!!!!!

Wooohhoooooo!!!!!!!!

So happy for you OP.
Bloody well done you.

Fantastic stuff. You can take pride in everything you have achieved over the last few months.

Brilliant

Oh Yay!

Have been thinking about you.

Hope it all goes as well as possible lass. Will be rooting for you.

Be careful - tablet for DD’s birthday and your M’s (can’t bring myself to put ‘D’ as she is aweful) might be linked. She might have ‘find my tablet’ on it ...

Maybe get the tablet checked out

Well done! And yes, I'm deeply suspicious about the gift of the tablet and now, suddenly, your Mum has a smart phone?
I bet she knows where you are, tbh. Sorry but she's a manipulative, conniving piece of work and I'd be very concerned at this.

Well done- big hugs.

She asked me where we were on phone last night and I wouldn't tell her. Will prevent any further phone calls as she will pump DD for info. Also she forced DD to say 'I love you' on phone (I was next to DD and could her mother down the phone 'night night DD, love you' DD: 'ok night' mother, pointedly, 'love you, DD' DD: ' love you' ). If DD was really happy to talk to my mother I'd still feel bad about making her cut off all contact but I think I have to so that she doesn't keep pressurising DD to find out where we are and turn up here.

Congratulations OP! You have done so well. Don't feel bad about cutting contact, she brought it upon herself

Well done for managing the move OP and i hope DD will like her new school.

Just caught up with your latest. Whoo hoo - congratulations on reaching freedom. Sounds like your DP was genuinely ill, but he did come over to help so that's good. Good luck with DD starting at her new school and with the new house search. Hopefully you can enjoy some rest and give yourself time to recover from all the stresses that this move has put you through - let your poor body recover a bit. Enjoy your lovely rental, you both deserve it.

Thanks so much. Yeah, my body feels a bit wrecked. Lots of night sweats. Woke up at 12.30 today so good to catch up on some sleep. Spent last couple of hours treating DD and myself for nits, argh! I'm 38 and have never had nits in my life until now! Time to put the kettle on

To make a cup of tea, I mean, not pour over my head

Nits provably didn't dare enter the house when your M was there

Sorry, know I haven't said anything before, reading your thread has been really tough as I've a similar relationship, but I'm so impressed at the way you won through. Please don't expect any kind of normal relationship with her though, it's just not going to happen. I hope that's not too harsh, but it's her character, not a funny turn. This is who she is, how she functions. That isn't going to change. She might play nice to get back in touch, but the mask will slip again. Sorry, told you I was affected .

Good luck with the nits!

First couple of days at new school have gone well. Really proud of DD - she's coping with all this change so well. She did have a cry a few days ago but I'm actually glad because she usually bottles things up. Won't feel properly settled until we're in our permanent home (fingers crossed there are no setbacks with that purchase) but things are going ok.

Wow well done op I’m sure you’ll get more agro from your mum, she doesn’t seem the type to give I but you’ve done amazingly well and I’m sure your dd will be grateful as she gets older

Wishing you both great times in your new home

Funny how she wasn't crying to see your Mum it will get better and better then the usual teenage palaver will kick in but you'll be in a healthier situation to cope and deal with it!