To think she should have checked in?

[Ikanails]

I’ve been compelled to write my first post by the absolute CF’ry of this mum.

Background- DD (7) has best friend in school, have met mum at parties, school gate etc and had her DD for tea after school. I have DD and am 6 months pregnant, OH works nights.

Haven’t seen DD’s friends mum for a while but got a text from her earlier this week asking if I would have her D for the night on Friday as she was attending work do. Initially I was a bit because we haven’t spoken to eachother for a while but thought it would be nice for DD so I agreed.

Didn’t hear from the mum again until later in the week I was shopping and asked if there was anything her D wouldn’t eat. No problem, thought I’d get another text Friday to confirm arrangements, no such text arrived.

Pick up Friday - DD’s friend has overnight bag and is happy to be coming home with us so I take it the sleepover is still on! Got home, made something to eat, doesn’t like the food, fine, supply alternative (clearly there are foods she doesn’t like!). Crossed my mind that mum hadn’t checked in to see if everything ok but didn’t think much more of it.

Went about our evening, kids played, watched a movie, popcorn, up and down the stairs, generally having a good time. At bed time I thought mum will text soon to check in surely, no text.

I text her around before 9pm to say that everything was fine, hope she’s having a good night - no reply.

10pm, DD’s friend is upset, can’t sleep, scared, up and down, I’m knackered as it is and really just want to go to sleep but obviously don’t want to ruin mums night out so just get on with it.

This morning, I checked WhatsApp, the mum hasn’t even been online since 7pm last night, never mind read my text... she hasn’t checked in, hasn’t called to say what time she’s picking up, DD is supposed to be going out with OH at 12 so I can rest (I work full time through the week).

AIBU to think the mum is a complete CF?! Who doesn’t check in to see if their child is ok? Or send a text or call to say what time they’ll be picking up? I can’t help thinking what if there had been an emergency?! I’m giving her till 12 before I ring because don’t want to make a scene but I just can’t believe I haven’t heard from her since earlier this week!!

Sorry for the long post but who does that?!?!?!

Someone who has guaranteed that you'll never do it again!

And don't expect her to have your DD for tea either!

Don't wait til 12, you want her collected by then
Call now

What time has she collected her when she's stayed before? She should've replied to your text. You should've said when you agreed to have her, yes that's fine but we have plans from twelve on Saturday, agree may well be indulging in a hang over and is taking the P expecting you to provide a weekend of free childcare. Does she ever have your DD to stay? Where's the other child's dad could he not come and get her?

can you go and drop her back?

Take her home yourself if you can.

Call her and say she needs to be collected by 12 as you have plans.

Call her and let her know 12 is the cut off point.

If she's late and tries to spin a story, cut it short and just say nice to see you DD's friend, have a good weekend! And shut the door.

She definitely should have replied to your text, anything could have happened!

Yep, ring her and tell her she needs to come and get her child ASAP and you have plans.

Actually phone and say your dh will drop her back by 12.

• as you have plans

How have you not called her?!?!

Best way to make sure kids are gone on time is to arrange to take them back yourself , in my experience.
My ds was on a sleepover last night. Mum texted me saying she was bringing him back in the morning, he might be tired. No problems, no cheeky fuckery, she just took control of her own kids sleepver to make sure everyone was gone by 10

That’s absolutely outrageous, although I think I may know the CF . . . 😒

Wow this is strange behaviour isn't it! Cheeky enough to have asked you given that you aren't exactly close but this is something else!

She'll have to go out wjth your oh if Mum hasn't come by then. Text the Mum letting her know and put a note on the door saying you are not to be disturbed.

Take her home

Massive CF.

Although, I would be worrying that something may had happened to her - but that's just anxiety.
Give her a call OP.

So she’s been online this morning and read my message 20 minutes ago but still hasn’t replied!

Sorry I should have said, I don’t drive and embarrassed to say we don’t actually know where she lives! Apart from it being close to the school.

I haven’t called up till this point because I know she was at a party and didn’t want to be ‘that mum’. I’m calling her now though!

So she asked you but then didn't contact you again even when you were asking her questions? The poor child.

You could take her home, but if the mum or dad aren't home you'll be in the same position, probably with an upset child.

She’s taking the piss , that poor child

X-post. Definitely don't take any excuses, the CF mum needs to sort it.

This is bizarre! Definite CF territory.

What a cow bag!

To be fair, she could have lost her phone or left it somewhere.