To think that some women go on and on about the obesity crisis and weight

[Tobythecat]

Just to be smug about their healthy eating and slimness?

I have noticed it on here a lot and real life, even a good friend of mine posted something on facebook about it and i was disappointed with her for being so judgemental.

People who fat shame and go on about the obesity crisis and talk about overweight peoples eating habits dont seem to think that these individuals likely have binge eating disorders and bullimia.

I have had a binge eating problem since i was a child and used to starve myself. Im overweight and trying to lose it but im sick of some smug women who try to make people like me ashamed of our weight issues.

A good friend of mine just posted about a quote from the bible about obesity and gluttony. A lot of her friends are carrying weight and i just felt like she posted it to feel smug and superior. Shes always going on about how she used to make herself sick and talks about how she only eats salad and healthy stuff, whilst offering me a biscuit.

AIBU to think that a lot of women do this as a way to feel superior?

It genuinely makes me feel anxious about where we will be in 20 years time when I see (with my own eyes) that not just some, but MOST people are actually overweight.

That implies that nearly everyone is overweight which isn't the case. 40% of the population is not overweight or obese. The rate of obesity has not increased for a few years now either so there is no reason to feel "anxious" about where we will be in 20 years time.

It's not even a self-fulfilling prophecy, oh god, I'll have to name-change again- I mean confirmation bias.

Actually Gorgon, if you live in a "nice" part of London then most people are not overweight.

Research shows 95% of people who try to lose weight regain it over 5 years.

What exactly does beating people up who are trapped in the cycle of obesity do? Do we do this to people with other health conditions? Once you are morbidly obese even a year of eating better than a slim person and exercising won't solve it . (In my case I'm hoping a year will seriously improve my situation but I'm realistic.)

Being obese changes your body makeup. More fat cells. More hormones etc. It's not simple to change. Anyone advocating something with a 5% success rate as if anyone could achieve it is crackers.

AnxiousPeg
Yes. The man in Jack Wills was made up but comparable
Sadly, I know these women sharing stupid moans about shops on social media because I have a friend who insists on sharing them on a weekly basis. Also got another family friend who likes to repost links to 'body positive' blogs which seems to be less about being body positive and more about why being reasonably overweight is fun fine and sexy, denying the health issues, all love your curves etc. The stupud thing is that friend is always on and off diets. They diet for 6 weeks, theb decide they are fat and fabulous, then they're doibg another diet, then there's skinny shaming posts. I hid their posts because being a family friebd unfriending would cause more issues but I found myself getting frustrated and irritated

I think for me red sums it up. There's an increasing shift to a mentality of all lifestyles abd choices are equal, the world should be full of praise and affirmation for just existsing and that filters into shops where people now feel they are entitled to wear the number they want in their clothes.

If i have to go up a size, so what? That's an item of clothing, not my whole self worth. If I try a pair of trousers on and they do nothing for my flat bum, so what? I'll try another style.
So why people knowing they have bigger legs, try super skinny jeans on and then complain when it doesn't work for them is beyond me. It's simple. Try another size, try another style, try another cut. But don't expect the world to cater to your feelings.

And yes there's so many society factors isn't there- those in the nice part of London probably have a higher disposable income, means to buy healthier food, less stress just to live etc. 101 reasons why those struggling in poor areas might have disordered eatong or suffer obesity and the response should nt be to heap further shame .

I think it just makes people feel good and reassures themselves they're not "like That" but superior.

I suppose scared my take would be that the solution is to promote healthy eating habits and healthy eating mindsets, make it affordable to eat healthily, make it normal to not be sedentary, starr normalising basic levela og activity. Encourage people to do what they can to make better choices rather than normalise being overweight and obese just because the average woman is 5ft3 and a size 16 and we don't want to hurt people's feelings.

It's the thing I've noticed in the multiple sports clubs I'm in. Nobody looks down on larger people at all. It's very much positivity. Well dones. Help to make changes. That to me is much better than 'let's pretend there's no issues with size, we'll just ignore the issue and make sizes bigger so people can feel good'. The very places people assume are going to be hostile to larger people are actually some of the most inclusive in my experience.

"I'm quite happy to admit I find fat people very unattractive. I can't see anything appealing about being twice the size you should be, waddling down a road, sweating and panting from minimal physical effort."

Maybe you should stop and consider why you are not happy to see a fat person doing the exercise you say you want them to do?

I have a colleague who brings in fruit for herself, and a shed full of chocolate or other sweet stuff for everybody else.

If I ask her why she won’t eat the chocolate she brought in, she’d say ‘oh no, that’s too fattening’. 🙄. Yeah, so it’s ok for everybody else to eat the fattening stuff, while she makes it out she is eating healthy.

I refuse to eat the chocolate etc she brought in on principle.

Very good point stormtreader.
That comment was way to go to make people feel even more self conscious about excercising. Cue stop trying at all. Result put o ore weight.

I hate people like that crumbs.

I have a colleague who loves to lead people into asking questions about their food. It's another opportunity to be fake ditzy and talk about how rubbish they are at eating.

Maisy

You misunderstood if you think I'm defending vanity sizing. I get that sizes have increased. I get that this links to people getting bigger.

What I was objecting to was a) the term vanity sizing (as it falls back on a misogynistic stereotype)

And b) your use if misogynistic language.

There are ways dealing with a health crisis without being sexist and/or a judgemental bore.

It’s a real eye roller isn’t it 🙄@MaisyPops.

The other week, same colleague told somebody from our dept she had lost a stone. Then later, she told somebody else from a different dept, that she had lost a stone and a half ..

I get that people have issues with their weight, but it’s a different thing when they take it out on people, to make them feel bad for being slimmer.

You mentioned slim shaming as opposed to fat shaming upthread. I agree It does exist..

I hate people like that crumbs.

I have a colleague who loves to lead people into asking questions about their food. It's another opportunity to be fake ditzy and talk about how rubbish they are at eating.

People are getting bigger and not just fatter. I used to be tall but I'm not next to teenage girls now. Sizes need to change over time.
It's a shame the shops haven't worked out that many feet are bigger too.

anxious
Whining is not misogynistic language.

As I've said, round my way kids get told to stop whining, pets whine if they're bugging you for food.

Whining -

1. give or make a long, high-pitched complaining cry or sound.
2. complain in a feeble or petulant way.

If someone is doing petulant poor me the shops are mean because I can't wear the size I want then it is whining. Someone going on in strops about anything negative ypur life chances is going to break their fragile self is whining. People going on about how the world should validate them so they can never be challenged is whining. Posing for photos stuck in trousers for symapthy and to complain is petulant and whiny.

But I'll paraphrase in a lengthy way to avoid claims misogyny - people who are petulant and spend their time complaining in pathetic, stoppy and poor me fashions are ridiculous regardless of their genitals (a pretty lengthy alternative to 'whining').

Well said @MaisyPops*, overweight people cry 'fat shaming' all the time, yet it seems absolutely fine and not a problem to 'skinny shame' I'm a size 6-8, always been slim. I don't point out anyone else's weight or comment on it, but I have a friend who is significantly overweight yet constantly slags me off for being 'too thin', 'you look like a boy' and constantly calling me a 'skinny minnie',

I bet if I called her a 'fatty watty' though I'd be accused of bullying*

This ^

Sorry, that should have been highlighted.

I am the first person to defend anyone being "skinny shamed" but the you can't seriously compare the two. There is not the same stigma attached to being skinny. Thin people are treated with no where near the same contempt as the "disgusting fatties" mentioned previously in the thread.

@FaFoutis - as someone with size 3 feet, oh yes shops have realised feet are getting bigger, many shops ranges now start at a size 3. It's fine if I want flat shoes/boots or trainers, I can hit the kids ranges, but heels are very hard to find, unless I'm prepared to spend a lot of money.

(I also think the vanity sizing thing has happened with shoes, and some stores I have 15 year old shoes from still fit, but their newer ones feel loose, which is a problem when I'm already the smallest size they do in the adult range!)

Oh and as someone who is thin but only for pure vanity and not health, I agree a lot of the concern about larger people is fake - most thin woman aren't practicing self restraint on foods because they are worried about their health, but worried about their arse size.

I can easily see why not everyone makes or is able to make the same choices around foods and exercise, but that doesn't make my vanity to be thin a more moral position.

Yy angryburd Its like white people complaining about racism.

I feel sad depressed and anxious when i walk down the street and see the amount of homeless people that there are.

Especially the homeless couple in my area who were attacked this week. The woman was slashed on her arm with a knife and has had to have stitches.

Her husband is waiting to undergo a secondary treatment for cancer. He is overweight due to the steroids. But its not due to eating because ..............hes homeless and cant always get access to food. I guess some would still be more concerned with his size though.

NHS cant do this treatment because he needs a home to go to and recover (which flies in the face of saying that NHS is accessible to everyone.) They are supposed to be priority for housing but i first met them when we had the "Beast from the East in very early March and they are still on the streets.

This is what makes me sad depressed and anxious.

This Is a very interesting thread OP

I am glad you started it and it’s making me view some of my views

I need to ‘check myself ‘ a bit in this issue

As yes . I have lost weight to look good

And my mental health has weirdly deteriorated recently .

Go figure !

stopfucking i went through the same My physical health improved but my mental health nose dived.

And despite losing weight i often find myself feeling like i have to justify myself on here just because im a size 14

I was a 28 FFS!

Helena I am a 12-14 now
I am no skinny
But yeah the tits are out , getting the looks (ish)

But I felt happier a carb eating wine drinking 16

And joking aside we have seen each other in a few threads . And some of my comments have been not cool

Not a good look hey