To get so hurt over Facebook.

[doesmyheadin]

I honestly think I need to delete it as I take it far too personally.
But I HATE people removing me as a friend.
I’ve got anxiety and I’m a massive over thinker anyway and it really affects my mental health.
Latest one is that I work in a shop with 3 other women. A regular comes in and adds all 3 of us. 2 weeks later he just deletes me and stays friends with the other 2.
I don’t post that often, although I’ve got a big family and get tagged in photos a few times a week at bbqs or weddings, parties, soft play with the kids etc.
I occasionally post a photo of the kids in their party outfits if they look especially cute.
Now I’m overthinking if I’ve done people’s heads in so they’ve had to delete me.
I’m dreading seeing him at work now.
I must really annoy him for him to purposely go onto my profile and hit delete?
The other 2 people he’s kept as friends post every couple of weeks themselves and don’t get tagged in photos. Maybe he found them less annoying than me?

I deleted it. Best thing I ever did. It’s full of cunts

I get more suspicious of the people that watch and don’t post

why would you be suspicious of them? What do you think their intentions are?
I post something maybe once every couple of months. I probably scroll through every couple of days. Trust me, I don’t have any dubious intent . If people have posted in on their page and I am their friend, they must be happy for me to see it. I didn’t realise I had to provide material for them to view in return!

Took a time out on Fb in March 2016 as I was feeling just like you do, getting miserable when I saw people on outings/events I hadn’t been invited on etc.

Deleted my profile completely a month later and not missed it once.

I just can’t decide who and who not to delete.
How do I do this?
How about an old work friend I was close with 5 years ago but haven’t seen since, but I like seeing photos of her kids growing up?
Or a hairdresser I used when mine was on mat leave?
Or friends we met on holiday?
Or friends I met travelling?
I don’t know how to do this cull. Hence I may do a new one with friends I see in real life at least twice a year and family.

I was like this OP a year ago. I used to use Facebook several times a day ago post pics or status couple times a week.
I took a step back and feel happier. I browse through once a week and post on there myself every couple months just to kept it active. It takes over your life otherwise. I'm like you, I take things personally and for me it was so called friends going out for drinks or going to London to buy shoes and not inviting me but putting pics up as proof.
This is why I had to take a step back

There is absolutely no need to be hurt by Facebook.

The millions of people who are not on it have never been offended, and we manage very nicely without it.

Try being without it for yourself :)

I'm not sure how you're even aware someone has deleted you - especially in such a short space of time. Are you actively looking to see if you're still friends with people?

I delete people ALL the time and I'm sure people delete me all the time too.

My mum is too involved with Facebook too - she notices if someone hasn't liked statuses of hers and even mine. It must be exhausting! I've told her to delete it - I would recommend the same for you.

lifechangesforever I think people must keep track of their number of friends, then if it goes down go trawling through the list to see who has deleted them.
Madness!

Wow!

Haven't RTFT but just wanted to say that when a friend was staying another friend of hers friended me. Every day she posted photos of herself and her dogs on walks. After a month or so I noticed I'd been quietly dropped and asked my friend about it (not that I cared, I was just curious). She told me it was because I wasn't posting all the time and liking every photo she posted. I hadn't even realised that 'liking' was a thing! Who knew that people counted their likes, and noted who they were from? How needy is that.

I cull my friend list all the time, I only have about 30 friends, I've made most of them acquaintances because I don't post much and I'm not really that interested. Instead of worrying about other people unfriending you, go through your friend list and make everyone, apart from family, into an Acquaintance. Life gets much easier and less stressful.

Delete everyone you don't see on a regular basis. Everyone you wouldn't trust with your children.
My yard sticks...

Is this person family?
Yes... keep.

Is this person someone I see regularly?
Yes - keep. No - delete.
Is this person someone I trust?
Yes - keep. No - delete.

The only person I'm aware deleted me (others may have too) put two and two together and got 5 and assumed I was shagging a married man. Stupid woman, I've ignored her in real life every since, not for deleting me but for listening to gossip and assuming it's true.

In your shoes OP I'd go through your facebook list and delete everybody who makes you feel shy/inadequate/awkward and anybody who if you passed them by on the street wouldn't say hello to you.

Well just shoved half of my friends on restricted.
Noticed that I’ve lost another friend too. Randomly it’s an old school friend that has deleted me and then readded me at least twice in the past 6 months. Literally don’t get Facebook!!!

Why don't you deactivate for a while? Take a break from it. I'm not on Facebook any more and I can categorically say it was the best thing I ever did for my mental health.
I think everyone should give it up. I'm like an ex smoker 😂

Some people (guys in particular) seem to treat Facebook as some sort of dating site! Happens to me a lot, friends of friends sometimes add me, being polite/daft I often accept only to have them unfriend me when they see my huge, muscly tattooed bouncer other half. I find that quite amusing actually.

Don't overthink it.

I deleted Facebook completely in 2012. I’d been fed up with it for a while, but the tipping point was when I ducked into a shop to avoid a person I was friends with on FB, but had had no contact with since we left school. I realised how awkward it would be if we stopped and chatted, then thought “why the hell am I sharing things with people I actively avoid?”. I did a soft delete (is that deactivation?) for a month, reinstated it, then deleted it properly a week or so after that.

YABU to be 'hurt' by Facebook. AS GladAllOver said. Millions upon millions of people us it without any ill effects.

I would say it is odd to be adding people such as a bloke that comes in your shop though.

I'm another that wouldn't have a clue if anyone deleted me....... what do you do, have a check how many friends you have every day?

If I ever did notice for some reason, I wouldn't think twice about it.

Well just shoved half of my friends on restricted.

They may not even notice if they don't follow you anyway.

Go with the rule if you'd happily meet them for a coffee and chat then add them, if not don't bother.

I actually feel much better now I’ve restricted all these people.
As if they delete me I know that it won’t be because of anything I’ve said or done, as they won’t have seen anything I’ve said or done!!!

I deleted it. Best thing I ever did. It’s full of cunts

That's all your 'friends' then?

Tbh your generalised statement says more about you

I know what you mean - if I see I've 'lost a friend' on FB it bugs me too and I have to make sure that everyone important is still there! It is a big deal if a family member or real friend drops you on FB - of course you're going to wonder what 's going on.

Still, it can be for a load of reasons, including by accident. Not worth worrying about if you hardly know the person.

I facebook deleted someone today. I haven seen her personally in years. She was a business contact. She's moved location. I didnt know. She moved 2 years ago. So her connection to me is minimal. So I deleted her. I really hope that she is not as upset as you would have been. She's a lovely lady. Lovely acquaintance but our paths no longer cross. Bye, bye!

If there was a reason for it then I probably wouldn’t mind so much.
But when a customer deletes just me and keeps the other 2 members of staff then I start to second guess myself.
Then the girl from school that adds and deletes me on a regular basis, but keeps my sister, that annoys me and makes me second guess what I’ve done wrong.
Sometimes I think it just is the sheer amount of photos I get tagged in.
We’ve got a huge family and lots of friends and hobbies so at least once a week there’s photos of us on a mini break, or rugby tour weekend, or family holiday, weddings, christenings, parties, meals out as a big group etc.
They probably do get sick of seeing my face. But they won’t now they’re on restricted!!!

Even my cousin's adult sons, who I'm very fond of, are acquaintances, and I'm sure they have me on the same list.

Just checked and in the last 10 days there have been 6 posts of photos of me and my family.
In all fairness 2 of those posts were mine, one of the kids going to a party and one of the cat sat on the neighbours roof. So I do probably post myself once every 5-7 days.
Probably is pretty annoying.