To get so hurt over Facebook.

[doesmyheadin]

I honestly think I need to delete it as I take it far too personally.
But I HATE people removing me as a friend.
I’ve got anxiety and I’m a massive over thinker anyway and it really affects my mental health.
Latest one is that I work in a shop with 3 other women. A regular comes in and adds all 3 of us. 2 weeks later he just deletes me and stays friends with the other 2.
I don’t post that often, although I’ve got a big family and get tagged in photos a few times a week at bbqs or weddings, parties, soft play with the kids etc.
I occasionally post a photo of the kids in their party outfits if they look especially cute.
Now I’m overthinking if I’ve done people’s heads in so they’ve had to delete me.
I’m dreading seeing him at work now.
I must really annoy him for him to purposely go onto my profile and hit delete?
The other 2 people he’s kept as friends post every couple of weeks themselves and don’t get tagged in photos. Maybe he found them less annoying than me?

I think a lot of people here need to grow up

You are definitely over thinking this, it’s not that serious. It could be a range of things from an accidental mis click to him simply condensing his friends list.

If the only updates from you are photos you’ve been tagged in with your family, he may have been constantly seeing photos of random people on his timeline (ie your family) and so unfriended you, especially as you don’t really post much yourself. Not everyone is super interested in your family life.

Someone else could have deleted you like a younger sibling messing around on his phone.

Maybe he forgot it was you if you look different online and he only really knows you by your first name, as it doesn’t sound like you interacted much online. Sometimes I forget who X person online is if I never interact with them, and I just think ‘when did I follow you, Instagram must be playing up’

Whatever it is, it’s that serious in the grand scheme of life. I delete/hide posts from people all the time - it’s just because their content annoys me, not necessarily that I don’t like them as a person. EG people that constantly post long ridiculous rants, constant memes, cringey stuff etc. I have probably met 100s of people that I haven’t added on social media including colleagues, old friends and extended family, and that’s okay.

To change people to restricted I take it that I need to click on every single profile and change to restricted? That’s gonna take a while!

Not that serious*

Delete it. Nothing is worth affecting your anxiety or your mental health. I agree that he might have wanted single girls as friends. You did nothing wrong and it is all him. If you see him in the store just be exactly how you were with him.
I used Facebook for a few years around 2006-8. I deleted it as it affected my anxiety. Since then there have been a number of family issues. If I had been on Facebook, it would have been magnified with all the hearsay and deletion that would have happened. My friends are exactly the same as pre Facebook.

IT'S ALL BOLLOCKS

Hth!

I've deleted the odd person when they've really annoyed me or I'm sick of their posts constantly coming up with photos of their latest drunken night out etc. To be honest how would you know if you've been deleted ?

Just stuck about 20 people on restricted. People that are more acquaintances than close friends.
Feel a bit better for doing that as their times lines won’t be filled with me and my kids now. The rest are close friends from the past, friends I have contact with regularly now and family.

Social media brings out the worst in people, just delete it.

🙈

Just delete everyone who isn't family or a very close friend.
Then you can stay in the groups for your kids clubs without being friends with 100's of randoms.
I only have a handful of people on mine for privacy!

I was Facebook friends with a woman from a toddler group for about 3 years when she suddenly deleted AND blocked me

I often block people when I’m deleting them if I think they’ll take it badly (based on how drama llama-like they generally are) as I think being invisible to them is less of a slap in the face than seeing they’ve just been deleted. With blocking they can maintain the quiet fiction that you’ve deleted your profile!

Send a message to anyone that you aren’t VERY close friends or family telling them that you streamlining your Facebook and will be deleting everyone. Then do so. Keep Facebook for people you actually like. Change your settings to the most private possible.

If you want to use it for groups etc then do so. You don’t need to use it for friends too. I have NOT a single friend on my Facebook. I just use it for a few groups and messenger.

On Friday morning I was on the train and went to 'unfollow' someone who clogs up my newsfeed a bit. It then gave me the option to review others and without much thought I unfollowed EVERYONE of my FB friends other than businesses and my local community group - I know this sounds weird but that's the only stuff I really enjoy reading. It didn't actually take that long although I admit it was a boring train journey!

I've hardly gone on it since then and I know it's very early days but this tactic seems to have worked for me. Obviously I can go and look at anyone's profile if I want a nosey, but it's not there in my face. Compared to a normal weekend I've definitely spent less time browsing my newsfeed and like other have said I can honestly say that I've not once come off looking on fb feeling better about myself! Quite the opposite most times. And yet we persist with it!

Ridiculous I know. How do we get into this?!!

Is this guy a customer in your shop? If so, why is he a facebook 'friend?'

I think I’d have been more confused as to why he was adding me in the first place.
I only have friends and family on mine so wouldn’t have accepted.

Yes I totally understand it. I deleted it in February and have never looked back x

If you're not active on FB and never comment or rarely comment on people's posts...that's a possible reason to be deleted.

I'm thinking of deleting a couple of 'Friends' who are quite inactive.

I don’t think I’d notice if anyone deleted me. If I did, id not be too bothered (unless it was someone I was really close too, like my husband, or brother). I know that people delete for so many reasons, pretty much none of them would make me think it was something I needed to change about myself, so I don’t really care. Being annoying on fb, if that’s the reason, isn’t a character flaw I’d be too concerned about.

I wouldn't notice if I was deleted TBH. As for being hurt, if somebody who was a shop customer sent me a request to add them I'd ignore it anyway as they wouldn't be somebody I'd consider a friend.

See, my thoughts are that social media is for posting things. I get more suspicious of the people that watch and don’t post.
I’d be far more likely to deleted those than someone who actively posted.
Some people hate others posting as it’s annoying, others hate people not posting!
You can’t win. Thinking about setting up a brand new one with just family and close friends. So maybe 50 people on instead of 500.

I genuinely wouldn’t know if someone had deleted me - that’s how little attention I pay.

Why do you need to set up a new one?
Just delete everyone and put a public status saying your deleting a lot of people for privacy reasons. That's that. 🤷‍♀️

I think I’ve been adding people I shouldn’t to be honest.
I have lots of “friends” but these “friends” are just people I know in real life, not particularly someone I’d class as a friend.
There’s no one on there that I don’t know IRL but most of them are old school or work friends or acquaintances .

I deactivated my account for similar reasons a few years ago (for a second time!), and I've never looked back. It does make a difference.

Do other people not give it a second thought when they get deleted?
I wouldn't know how to find out if someone deleted me. Unless maybe I specifically tried to look at their profile or something