to think it's silly not to have sex just because I'm pregnant?

[BlueSwirlBabe]

DP won't have sex even though I'm only 18 weeks. Says he's not comfortable with it as he thinks baby can tell. I've told him otherwise and shown him the research to go with it. We haven't had sex since baby was conceived as he thinks it is 'wrong'. He won't look at me and I just feel ugly and unattractive.

I'm not saying he has to have sex with me, of course. Nobody should do anything they aren't comfortable with. AIBU however to be gutted by this? 9 months of no sex and then some.

I'm considering ordering from love honey as if he ain't giving it to me then I'll do it myself!

Well I put on 5 stone and looked and felt hideous.

The great thing about having sex when you're pregnant is that you can have unprotected sex!

My dh did the same,except he never really gave a reason, just never wanted it. Much later he said it just felt weird. And like pp have said I was MUCH hornier when pregnant, much more sensitive, and bloody miserable so would have really liked the closeness. I cant say I've really forgiven him tbh. It felt like the cruellest rejection, handled insensitively, at a time I needed him most. Two years post natal I'm still resentful and our sex life still not back on track.

Is it really that unusual? My husband was the same in all of my pregnancies. Even though he knew it wouldn’t hurt the baby, he just said it felt ‘wrong’. Mind you, we had had a mc the first pregnancy so maybe he felt he wasn’t prepared to do anything that in his head might cause a problem.

I just sorted myself out, so to speak. It wasn’t a problem.

You would have liked it. But doesn't mean he has to give it.
He should have discussed it why he didn't want it but just because you're Hornier doesn't mean he has to do it.

The I don't see why not wanting sex is a cruel thing to do.

It's the rejection that's cruel - as you say, not giving any explanation or reassurance. That's cruel.

I agree he should have spoken to you and that's mean of him not to.

However Ops husband is not being unreasonable to not want to have sex

Well this thread took a turn for the ridiculous.

Of course anyone can refuse to have sex with anyone else and it is entirely their choice. But if someone says they don't want to have sex with their husband or wife purely because of something that has no basis in fact, then they're being stupid.

If he were to say "I don't find you attractive" or "I just don't feel like it", then fine, but "my penis might hit the fetus" is absurd and deserves to be laughed at.

I couldn’t get enough sex during my first pregnancy - it was lovely not to have to worry about protection etc. Husband was thrilled.

Second pregnancy I had a low laying placenta and was advised against sex until it moved up and out of the way. This was at 20 weeks.

It moved out of the way at 32 weeks! Hurrah! Never been more excited 😂😂

I think some men just feel weird about it. Try not to let it make you feel unattractive OP. X

See

This is what hapoens when threads appear in the DM

@BigPierre. Ah do you have to put big in your name to compensate for your small one bless .

I know you haven't and any women before but this don't the way to speak to them. No wonder you're a single and lonely little shit that has to post on a parenting website about having sex.

How will the baby know you're his or her daddy. . No women would stay with you long enough

Shame I'm a man .
Funny that Pierre can't use the correct tense either .

You don't have a thick penis dear, you're just thick in general, mainly mental capacity. Run along now.

Can I ask where is my place as a man?

I'm a man. If you know how check my username and you will see I'm a man .

If I was you I wouldn't limit your choices on who you want sex with, not many people would give you a second glance so you need all the chance you can get.

What's taking you so long? Using your tiny penis to type are you?

Or can't your tiny brain work out how to? Seems as it's filled with women hating crap

OP, ignore the (surprising number of) bullshit responses you are getting here. Particularly ridiculous ones about your DH not loving you anymore or it being an indication he will cheat

I am heavily pregnant and I have never been less into sex. DH and I have maintained what I think is a "reasonable" amount of sex, but neither of us are jumping at the chance - I assume all my complaints of discomfort in general and huge bump are a turn-off, which I also think is probably fair enough. Nothing says "sexy" like the chance of breast milk leaking out during foreplay right? (hasn't happened yet but I live in fear!)

You are not being unreasonable at all, because your DH's excuse is stupid. But even though I know it's a bullshit reason I too didn't want sex for a while because of the feeling of the baby being disturbed/concern, and the first couple of times we did I felt awful and guilty afterwards. If you can someone convince him to do it a couple of times he will get used to the feeling and realise it doesn't matter a thing. Just get creative to turn him on and see if you can convince him that way? I.e don't discuss just do.

Not like I have time to myself to well... you know... very frustrating

Just tell him you're going to masturbate and if he wants to enjoy the "show" then crack on. He's probably still horny and this could be your new routine if penetration isn't his bag right now.