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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Friend spends the weekend with me then ‘reviews’ her experience, wtf!?

999 replies

Biscusting · 09/06/2018 21:25

Friend has been good friend during our uni days. We’ve loosely kept in touch over the years, but different career choices, interests, distance and children have pushed us in different directions.

She messages me out out of the blue to ask about staying a weekend with us. We live in an area popular with tourists.

I’m feeling a bit put out, as don’t fancy hosting, but we had no concrete plans and thought it would be a nice catch up.

Anyway she stays we have dinner out one night. She’s spends a day visiting a popular attraction and we have a nice evening in with a selection of nibbles, pizza, cheese and wine etc. Uneventful, pleasant weekend I feel.

Now i’ve just been browsing FB and looked on her page to see if she’d posted any pictures. To find she’d written quite a lengthy post about her stay. I don’t want to copy and paste, but basically it’s along the lines of, ‘had an okay weekend with Biscusting, staying at her place. Found the breakfast underwhelming and conversation with her DH a bit dry.
The sleigh bed in the guest room was too high and I bumped on the wooden edge so often I have a bruise. The room was too small.’.....the WiFi speed was poor at best’

She goes on to critique the decor and waffles on a lot about the tourist attraction she visited. Then ends the post with ‘all in all i’d give her two stars’

Wtaf is this!? Has she mistaken FB for trip advisor and my home for a hotel!?

We don’t have many shared friends, but people have liked her bloody post. 13 people!

Now the thing is she talked about coming back at the end of July for an exhibition and we made relatively firm plans about her return.

AIBU to tell her to jog on?

OP posts:
Yoksha · 10/06/2018 15:48

This is up there with the CF entitled cow that wanted chaperoned during plastic surgery etc. I thought I'd seen it all, but this tops it.

For what it's worth OP I think you did the right thing. To do any more would require others to pick sides. And that is a waste of energy. She has to live with her actions. Let's hope although she's in denial, she'll eventually learn from it. Look at this as a blessing. At least you won't invest anymore energy in this.

This too will fade in intensity. Concentrate on what works for you in your life. You sound lovely.

TeatimeForTheSoul · 10/06/2018 15:50

@Biscusting can understand she’d be acutely embaressed being found out (dud she forget you were a FB friend?) but to sim0ly unfriendliness you! Disgusting!
Please, please send a FB message to other 5 old friends asking them to post the poem by LarkDescending (page 17 of thread) in response to the review. Nothing to lose now.

TeatimeForTheSoul · 10/06/2018 15:51

*unfriend
Sorry mixture of poor typing and spellcheck

Fivelittleduckies · 10/06/2018 15:53

What a terrible and ungrateful “friend”! Sounds like she forgot you were on FB but good riddance to her regardless - don’t let her actions make you doubt yourself (or your home) even for a second! Flowers

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 10/06/2018 15:58

@Biscusting - maybe rather than a shit sandwich, you could send her a glitter bomb - that stuff gets everywhere. Or you could at least fantasise about sending it.

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 10/06/2018 16:02

How horrible.

I admit I was initially thinking it sounded like some poor tongue in cheek humour, but I was coming from the point that if I had been asked about it as it upset me I would have been mortified, apologised online and offline and made sure it was public. I would have also probably sent flowers and a bottle of wine.

Based on your most recent updates I think she's just a dickhead.

DamsonGin · 10/06/2018 16:08

I wonder if she unfriended you before you could post on her wall? Either way I should think she's off your Christmas card list. It'll be interesting to see how your mutual friends react.

LiteraryDevil1 · 10/06/2018 16:17

Not RTFT but read the first few posts. Bet this ends up in the news! What a cheeky bitch.

TheHodgeoftheHedge · 10/06/2018 16:18

My flabber is utterly gasted!

snowwhiteandthesevendogs · 10/06/2018 16:27

.

RoseWhiteTips · 10/06/2018 16:28

Where is the OP...?

PuppetOnAString · 10/06/2018 16:31

The OP posted 3 hours ago, maybe she’s busy.

Justrunwithit · 10/06/2018 16:31

So awful, poor OP. Dfr is batshit.

thatwouldbeanecumenicalmatter · 10/06/2018 16:38

Ha and a coward to boot.

I wonder if she’ll turn up in July? Don’t forget to slam the door in her ungrateful face Smile

Pipsqueak11 · 10/06/2018 16:40

OP you have behaved with class and dignity. sorry your batshit ex friend has been so awful .

C0untDucku1a · 10/06/2018 16:41

Well, youve nothing to lose now so send her a bill Grin

Chocolatecoffeeaddict · 10/06/2018 16:52

How weird. She sounds odd OP. Better off without her.

SauvignonBlanche · 10/06/2018 16:56

That’s seriously bonkers! Shock

Justturned50 · 10/06/2018 16:58

What a cow. You could always post on FB. Make it public so she can see it even though you aren't friends.

Mxyzptlk · 10/06/2018 16:59

The people who "liked" her post probably thought it was an in-joke between the two of you.
They couldn't know it was just out-of-the-blue rudeness.

missjsays · 10/06/2018 17:18

Wtf that is so weird!!!!
She sounds batshit what would possess someone to do any of that!?

KitKat1985 · 10/06/2018 17:18

I can't believe she didn't even try to apologise!

Oh well, at least you don't have to have her around in July now!

Freshfeelings · 10/06/2018 17:28

I'd message the five mutual friends faux concerned tbh. She's going to lie about you behind your back now so it's time to get the truth out there.

Say 'Hi I know it's been ages but I am just feeling really concerned about CFfriend. She came to stay on X date and we had what I thought was a perfectly pleasant time but she then wrote a really odd review of it on her FB page (including my husband's conversation) and when I messaged her to ask about it she unfriended me. Obviously this is not a friendship she values, to have done something like that, but it seems very odd behaviour indeed and I can't help feeling concerned'.

I totally would do this. I wouldn't be concerned in the least but I'd want the opportunity to tell my side before all your old uni friends end up thinking all sorts about you.

sonjadog · 10/06/2018 17:36

No, don’t turn it into a drama. Just move on with your life without further contact with her.

Freshfeelings · 10/06/2018 17:39

You'll star in her drama if you don't make sure people know the truth in a calm and non dramatic way. She'll taint people's opinions of you.