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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Friend spends the weekend with me then ‘reviews’ her experience, wtf!?

999 replies

Biscusting · 09/06/2018 21:25

Friend has been good friend during our uni days. We’ve loosely kept in touch over the years, but different career choices, interests, distance and children have pushed us in different directions.

She messages me out out of the blue to ask about staying a weekend with us. We live in an area popular with tourists.

I’m feeling a bit put out, as don’t fancy hosting, but we had no concrete plans and thought it would be a nice catch up.

Anyway she stays we have dinner out one night. She’s spends a day visiting a popular attraction and we have a nice evening in with a selection of nibbles, pizza, cheese and wine etc. Uneventful, pleasant weekend I feel.

Now i’ve just been browsing FB and looked on her page to see if she’d posted any pictures. To find she’d written quite a lengthy post about her stay. I don’t want to copy and paste, but basically it’s along the lines of, ‘had an okay weekend with Biscusting, staying at her place. Found the breakfast underwhelming and conversation with her DH a bit dry.
The sleigh bed in the guest room was too high and I bumped on the wooden edge so often I have a bruise. The room was too small.’.....the WiFi speed was poor at best’

She goes on to critique the decor and waffles on a lot about the tourist attraction she visited. Then ends the post with ‘all in all i’d give her two stars’

Wtaf is this!? Has she mistaken FB for trip advisor and my home for a hotel!?

We don’t have many shared friends, but people have liked her bloody post. 13 people!

Now the thing is she talked about coming back at the end of July for an exhibition and we made relatively firm plans about her return.

AIBU to tell her to jog on?

OP posts:
JessieMcJessie · 10/06/2018 11:31

Didn’t say it was obviously a funny joke.

southeastdweller · 10/06/2018 11:31

It probably was a joke, but a bad one that she shouldn't have made, and there's no way I'd let this go if it was me.

I would bide your time until July, having confirmed her staying, then as others have suggested, go away when the time comes leaving her high and dry when she comes knocking. That evening, email her the screenshot of the post with a suitably bitchy comment. Personally I couldn't be bothered reading her reply, I'd just block and delete at that point and put it down to experience.

ciderhouserules · 10/06/2018 11:32

FGS don't reply as if you are a Hotel! The fb readers won't understand and may well assume that you are a hotel, and the review is valid.

And just leaving 'wow' is open to misinterpretation too. You might be 'wow'ing about the horrible 'experience' CF had, or that she was being funny 'wow'.

I'd def have to leave something like 'This is my HOME. You invited yourself, used it for your own advantage, and feel as if you can 'review' it like this? I'd have to let all her friends know what she's done. Angry

SilverHairedCat · 10/06/2018 11:33

Don't descend this into a bloody poetry thread, this isn't about you, it's about the OP.

OP has clearly stated she's already messaged the friend and is awaiting a response.

Tinkobell · 10/06/2018 11:33

If you've only loosely kept contact you've little to loose on this, so it's gloves off IMO.
"Dear Readers and likers of this post, xxxx for the record, self invited hersełf to our home at a time when we were busy but pleased to see her. We put our own plans to oneside and did our best to offer food, a nice room and friendship. We are baffled and hurt that she then goes to such lengths on FB to review a stay with a friend. Do be warned others, this seems to be xxxx's idea of a cheap laugh. Premier Inn offer great discounts, beds and wifi...so do jog on"

Namechangedname · 10/06/2018 11:33

Just reply underneath with a Shock

Chocolatelavender · 10/06/2018 11:34

TweetleBeetlesBattle

I'd be tempted to say nothing, let her come in July, leave a sign on the door "Two Star Hotel. No Vacancies". Letting her know in advance she's not welcome just opens you up to whining about how you can't take a joke. Let her be put out by her actions.

Oh, yes! Do this Grin

ShamelesslyPlacemarking · 10/06/2018 11:41

As per my name!

kaytee87 · 10/06/2018 11:45

So op what did you reply to her?

Rozzzzzalmost35 · 10/06/2018 11:52

Ooft

Rozzzzzalmost35 · 10/06/2018 11:52

Ooft

IamPickleRick · 10/06/2018 11:56

I think you’ve all been too kind. I’d have written “what a cunt” and left it there Grin

Pinkyponkcustard · 10/06/2018 11:58

Is the op coming back?

Biscusting · 10/06/2018 12:00

Sorry for the late update. I’ve messaged her, basically asking wtf the Facebook post was about, that I found her comment mean spirited and felt hurt.

She hasn’t replied

OP posts:
TheFirstMrsDV · 10/06/2018 12:05

Aw OP.
Well done for being grown up and non drama queen about it.
Bit disappointing though Grin

Everyone on here is all agog for a proper Kyle style FB bust up.

I think you approached it the right way. She needed telling.

Aeroflotgirl · 10/06/2018 12:11

Good on you, for calling her out, what a nasty spiteful person she is. Even if it is a joke, it does not matter, what was said about op hospitality was disgusting. No wonder she hasen't replied, what a coward.

TemptressofWaikiki · 10/06/2018 12:11

Glad you spoke up OP. I personally have almost zero tolerance policy these days and would have blocked this person and have no further contact. There is just no room for such CFs in my life any longer.

StealthPolarBear · 10/06/2018 12:13

Perfect imo

toolazytothinkofausername · 10/06/2018 12:14

She hasn't replied as she knows she is in the wrong. Please do not have her back!

Dobby1sAFreeElf · 10/06/2018 12:15

I agree that you have handled that well, and she definitely needed telling.

Chapterandverse · 10/06/2018 12:20

How cruel of her.

I regularly host friends at my country/seaside home and would be horrified if they left a 'review' of my hospitality.

HushabyeMountainGoat · 10/06/2018 12:20

I think a private message is the dignified way to tackle this, OP. I do hope she replies to you as I cannot fathom what her reason for posting was.

I can only assume that she thought you couldn't see it and sees herself as some sort of blogger

Monny1 · 10/06/2018 12:23

Well done for being dignified in your response. You are too good for her. I hope that she does the decent thing and apologise to you.

IveGotBillsTheyreMultiplying · 10/06/2018 12:25

I have joked with guests before that we have a 'guest book' where we rate them.

We don't, and I'm not on fb and if I was I wouldn't actually do it.

For example guests who are so lovely that I don't have to clean for a week before they come 5*

Guests who leave their muddy hiking boots on in the newly carpeted living room -3*

Guests who make me laugh a lot 4*

Your friend definitely needs some feedback urgently or she will run out of friends quickly.

fuzzyfozzy · 10/06/2018 12:29

Is her post still visible?