Friend spends the weekend with me then ‘reviews’ her experience, wtf!?

[Biscusting]

Friend has been good friend during our uni days. We’ve loosely kept in touch over the years, but different career choices, interests, distance and children have pushed us in different directions.

She messages me out out of the blue to ask about staying a weekend with us. We live in an area popular with tourists.

I’m feeling a bit put out, as don’t fancy hosting, but we had no concrete plans and thought it would be a nice catch up.

Anyway she stays we have dinner out one night. She’s spends a day visiting a popular attraction and we have a nice evening in with a selection of nibbles, pizza, cheese and wine etc. Uneventful, pleasant weekend I feel.

Now i’ve just been browsing FB and looked on her page to see if she’d posted any pictures. To find she’d written quite a lengthy post about her stay. I don’t want to copy and paste, but basically it’s along the lines of, ‘had an okay weekend with Biscusting, staying at her place. Found the breakfast underwhelming and conversation with her DH a bit dry.
The sleigh bed in the guest room was too high and I bumped on the wooden edge so often I have a bruise. The room was too small.’.....the WiFi speed was poor at best’

She goes on to critique the decor and waffles on a lot about the tourist attraction she visited. Then ends the post with ‘all in all i’d give her two stars’

Wtaf is this!? Has she mistaken FB for trip advisor and my home for a hotel!?

We don’t have many shared friends, but people have liked her bloody post. 13 people!

Now the thing is she talked about coming back at the end of July for an exhibition and we made relatively firm plans about her return.

AIBU to tell her to jog on?

Does she blog as well?

I know someone who gets paid to blog for one of those city review sites. I can see how maybe she got into review blogging and got carried away.

Seriously???

This is unbelievable. Yanbu. I’d be ending this friendship. Are you a BNB? She’s written a TripAdvisor review 😐

Wow what a CF. If you don't want to publically shame she then do message she but I so want you to do a sarcastic review back

Ahh I'm feeling angry for you! What a CF. I'd probably just comment back with something like 'Appreciate your opinions on my humble abode, given your remarks we will be happy to never host you again!'

That reads as a joke to me - maybe poorly judged but I wouldn't think she was serious

Yes, I think I’d post something like... “We’re so sorry to hear you didn’t enjoy your stay with us at.... The management have noted your remarks and will endeavour to improve services. Oh, and please, don’t come back.”

True if she has curly hair, a nasally voice and a penchant for dangly earrings then your old uni mate is actually The Hotel Inspector. And possibly suffering some sort of pyschotic episode. What was in those pastries?

I HAVE been binge watching The Hotel Inspector and I wouldn't dream of being this cheeky!

Let us know what you decide to do, won't you, OP? And what happens next?

I also assume she thinks she's joking.

But I think her comments are so personal that they can't be anything other than hurtful.

And I think you're right to vocalise that hurt to her.

Wha kind of fuckwit uses FB as a diary?

Go get her OP

She sounds like a total prat. Press ignore.

It is not a joke. Surely. The woman does not have a clue.

I'd be telling her to jog on, and then some.

I think you are being too kind in your ‘wow’ post and messaging privately. You have been publicly humiliated! What an awful person she is, I would reply...

‘ It appears that you are ill educated in the art of social niceties, or put simply - manners. This is the poorest example of a thank you letter to a host that I have ever read! As you clearly need educating, I have included this link which will teach you the correct social niceties for future reference. The link is purely for the benefit of your next host, I would hate for anyone else to be subjected to such poor manners.

www.thespruce.com/hospitality-thank-you-letter-examples-1216766

Just to add, following your request to stay, we welcomed you into our home, we politely entertained you, despite your glaring inadequacies in manners and social niceties. It became glaringly obvious that you were using us as a hotel. I assume that you could ill afford the local 5* accommodation that you are used to.

Despite your poor manners and for the sake of our past friendship, we gave up our cherished personal time to entertain you. To find your frankly appalling ‘review’ on Facebook came as quite a shock! Particularly after you asked to ‘book’ in for another weekend in July.

As you seem to be under the impression that my home is a hotel, I am afraid that we will have to cancel your booking for July. The establishment found the guests morals and manners completely lacking and we deeply discourage others from entertaining Miss X in future.

Reply with humour. I like AcrossthePonds reply.

Dear Cheeky Guest

Send something with humour, never let her know you are hurt at her comments.

We are sorry the breakfast, the accomodation, the conversation, the husband and just about everything was not to your taste. We have never had complaints before, but then we don’t usually have cheeky freeloaders as our guests.

Regarding your planned stay in July, this free accomodation will be closed due to management deciding to refuse non paying —cheeky fucker— guests.

The Manager

Sorry about my terrible editing 😑

Everyone who reads it is going to cringe.

I do wonder that either she’s got humour very wrong or she’s totally socially inept to an extreme, in which case I’d be a little compassionate? This isn’t a normal thing, it shows her weakness for all to see. Could someone maybe even you have a diplomatic kind word with her?

Tell her you read it and are very upset. Your husband's conversation is dry and your sleigh bed too high - no one criticizes your sleigh bed!

(Rude and cheeky.)

Actually, I probably would have to post "This is really rude and you are not welcome to visit again." So her 13 friends can see you know. (at which point she will ring you and say it was a joke!)

I suspect this is a joke ( eg she thought breakfast was really good) but she hasn’t realised that it needs context to work and that you need to know the people concerned very well.

I am struggling to believe anyone would be so crass

I like CaledonianQueen's response.

Whatever reply you do use, be sure to point out that she invited herself to use you stay at your home, so that everyone is clear that you didn't invite this awful person to stay.

I would think about about what you would like the outcome to be.

Would you like to:
tell her she has been rude
Never have her to visit again
End the friendship
Embarrass her

Or all of these?

I don't think you you should reply publicly, and if you do then just something short like 'we welcomed you in to our home and this was very hurtful. '

Good luck and I'm sorry this happened. But look on the bright side, if she had given you 5stars then maybe you would have loads of 'friends' wanting to stay and now at least you can enjoy your lovely house in peace!

For those saying they read it as a joke - It can't have been a joke if real, surely? I mean a joke would read tongue in cheek and actually be funny.
Not imply your husband was a boring bastard who can't hold an interesting conversation and puts her to sleep and says the breakfast wasn't satisfactory!
I'd be tempted to do a response back.
"I'm sorry to hear that your recent stay wasn't to your satisfaction. Next time you're in the area,I hear the Travel Lodge down the road has comfortable amenities, no pesky attempts at conversation from anyone so you can sit in peaceful silence if you wish.
This one's shut up shop, so we won't be able to accommodate anymore,sorry.

Send her a bill.