Ban iPads & Tablets For Children

[londonmummyof1]

Is it just me, or does the iPad generation bother anyone else?

We went on a family holiday to Spain with my husband and almost 3 year old daughter, and at breakfast, lunch and dinner it’s the same sight - parents bringing out iPads for their preschool children to sit and watch - while eating!?! This is something I have never seen before and I absolutely do not agree with. I think seeing the scale of the problem during this one holiday shows what a problem this is. The thing is, the children aren’t even given the choice of asking for the iPad or to watch a show, it’s just slapped down in front of them and then they are glued. No interaction, just plugged into this simulated world, at the prime time in their life they are developing their language, speech, behaviour and personality - under the age of 5.

We did not bring an iPad for our child on holiday because we wanted to play in the swimming/splash pool, go to the beach etc and we spent such quality time with our child with memories we will keep forever.

This did not happen 20 or even 10 years ago - what did parents do with their children then? God forbid did they COMMUNICATE with their children at the dinner table?

What is happening to this world? Why not have a conversation with your child or bring a sticker book or story book for them to look at if feeding time is difficult. Every parent has been there with challenging mealtimes, but lugging the iPad around during 3 mealtimes, that’s a minimum of 3 hours your child is in a zombie state of mind, you’re starving them of developing their speech and ability to play by themselves and entertain themselves through play.

Do parents understand that too much screen time is extremely damaging to young children and can pave the way to obesity and development issues later in life?

I feel so passionate about this topic, as I’ve even seen some parents putting their children in pushchairs by the swimming pools glued to an iPad, when they could be swimming and having fun with their parents or siblings.

Parenting can be really tough, but somehow I think government intervention is required as this is such a vicious cycle, what future are we preparing our children for???

Simple alternatives to iPad/Tablet entertainment:

Play doh
Stickers
Books
Playing cards
Colouring books
Drawing

Absolutely BAN iPads & Tablets for children.

Go on then, tenaciousD, what kind of parent am I?
Don't worry, I've heard it all before from people about what kind of terrible parent I am. From I should give my ASD child a smack to make him behave, to I'm an ineffectual parent from my own mother who cannot deal with the extent of my son's issues, to people who assume that just because I give DS an iPad and headphones in the hospital waiting room for twenty minutes in a desperate attempt to avert a meltdown that will not only endanger me and him, but everyone around us, that I must never, ever interact with him.

My DD got an iPad from her Dad at 11 years old and used it a lot. But she learnt piano from it, got ideas for art projects, learnt so much from online resources and got some great shots for her projects at school. They are amazing things that do so much, shame hers got too old for me to have (iPad2) as is now very slow.

Now DD is 16 and just plays x-box all the time. I'd rather her use an iPad instead any day of the week than playing mindless crap but that's teens for you (she does go outside occasionally by the way, but has always been into gaming).

DS (4)uses my kindle to play games on before sleep at night but he's too on the go to use it in the day - he wants to be running around and doing things, so an hour a day in the evening? Not a big deal to me as he doesn't touch it during the day.

It's all about moderation and also monitoring what they are using it for. DS enjoys the CBeebies App which provides games that make him think and are fun. But then he also has fun with play doh, with his toy cars, with anything he can use with his imagination. So I'm happy for tablet time.

It's all about balance. Clearly having kids glued to the tablet at all times isn't great but eliminating a technology that their peers will be native in is also a bad idea for their future prospects. We don't allow tablets while eating and limit usage times (although I think we probably still give our kids too much screen time including tv).

We never use the technological babysitter either - but we have two chatty, biddable kids. They are teenagers now and still behave nicely - well, when out anyhow

(you have one, seemingly biddable child - you don't seem to realise quite how lucky that makes you)

We also do not use tech ourselves when out and about.

Play doh and stickers have no place when eating out, unless in a fast food restaurant with melamine surfaces and no carpets. Books, drawing paper, colouring books - merely low tech iPads.

iPads are useful but I think they are overused and create bad habits and sitting around.
No different to the tv but more portable.
I use them edicationally sometimes too but I don’t like them. But that is just me.

Well, when I was a kid, my parents rarely went out together, because finding a babysitter for us in the back of beyond was virtually impossible, and wrangling 4 kids in a restaurant would have been less fun than not going at all.

My nan was an advocate of moderation in everything, and I agree.

So if we're out for a family dinner, no ipads. If we're just out to eat because we're hungry, then easy going on devices (or books, or chatting). If it's an adult dinner and we have no babysitter, then yes, it's our defacto baby sitter so we can talk and they're not bored.

Better an ipad and iphones than bloody colouring in crayons in my opinion.

C'mon we all know OP has a very good point. There is far too much parental reliance on technology and if you genuinely believe there isn't then you seriously need to wake up. Without a shadow of a doubt. And not just kids, adults - pretty much all of us.

No different to the tv but more portable.

I don't agree with this - the language skills of my kids from listening to a wide range of youtube videos, the critical skills when evaluating things, because they've seen toy reviews, the fact that if something is interesting to them, they can read and watch an infinite amount of information around it, pull up any music to dance, all on demand, while doing a headstand on the settee (that isn't just my kids, they all watch at odd angles) - I don't think it's like TV at all - it's so much more active in use every way.

You wanted unbiased opinions whilst starting a thread with the snappy title of AIBU Ban iPads & tablets for children. .

You have a 2 yo and have decided they’re not good for children in general.

I think your very unscientific survey is a bit put shit in, expect shit out. Yet some lovely mumsnetters have engaged with you and told you reasons as to why they use these devices with their children.

I never used them with dd at this age but she is NT and we didn’t go out much due to my health. Good for you that you have such a lot of energy and time to give to your child. I’m chronically ill, disabled and shortly going to have an operation. We are not all the same.

Why if my kid uses an iPad or tablet for a couple of hours a week will turn out delayed when starting school? Do you think kids do nothing else apart from tablets .

Also on tablets and loads you can read, type stuff = very important skill now, colour in, play imaginative games such as sims and other random crap , watch videos, write using the stylus/pen and even do bloody jigsaw on it .

In conclusion stop being so judgey, just because you think you're the perfect parent because frankly no one is. My kid do all the tasks you say but still go on the tablet and it works for us. If you don't like it then fine but stop trying to tell us all how shit we're thanks.

My kids don't have iPads because they're just not really into them. And I still think you're being hysterically judgemental.

My 3 play on theirs and look at each other’s and talk about their progs, games, scores, take turns. It’s very chatty and sociable.

Whilst I agree to no iPads at the dinner table - I wouldn't ban iPads altogether.

DS has Dyslexia and technology means the world has opened up to him.

He can have passages read to him, listen to audio books, learn to type and be organised, amongst a few daily problems.

Technology helps a lot of disabled people live freely, even using it to turn the lights on or lock a door or close the curtains - there's a place for it

My DS doesn’t have one, we don’t get our phones at for him etc. No need

OP - you are NBU but I knew there would be lots of nasty replies on this thread - it is the new generation of parents who know best
I think technology has its place but it should be used with discretion. I am already horrified by the number of young adults who walk around glued to their phones without seeing other people to the extent they walk into fellow pedestrians. It is as if they cannot cope without a 'phone fix' .

Quite how the young 'Ipad' generation will turn out is anyone's guess.
The genie is well and truly out of the bottle.
Old gimmer here - who was so pleased I grew up in the 50s and life was so much simpler.

I bloody well hope that the "iPad generation" grow up to be less judgmental and nosy than the previous generations.

Stop snarking at other families, worry about your own family and enjoy your own damn holiday.

Here's the thing, you mention that you think children should be given things like books or colouring books or drawing paper or even playing cards, but have you not stopped to consider that iPads allow a child to do all that and more. There are interactive games that are helping them learn new things all the time, there are colouring apps or dress up games, or story book apps and yes, there is also Youtube for a bit of Paw Patrol or Peppa Pig etc.
If you choose not to let your child use an iPad, then you are of course allowed to carry out on that, but I do not believe you have a right to judge somebody else, especially when the most of the alternatives you suggest are possible with a tablet anyway, and it means having to carry less stuff around as a parent.

Mine is 2.5 and had her father's old iPhone just for apps. We download "educational apps" though. So, games of sorting shapes and puzzles and memory games etc. Useful for when I have a job to do.

She also has loads of toys and a great imagination.

You can have it both ways.

‘Parenting can be really tough, but somehow I think government intervention is required as this is such a vicious cycle’

Sounds like you have the perfect little family OP - wait til number 2 comes along and throw ADHD and play doh in to the mix in a restaurant and see how you get along then.

I’m sure the government have plenty to do without wasting millions on primarary legislation that won’t be enforceable.

Wilf is 22 but has had an iPad for 5 years. He would be lost without his. He uses it to communicate with people who can't understand what he's saying!

Oh, you also ask what future we are paving for our children? One that has technology right at the forefront, so we just have to accept that it is here to stay, like it or not. Yes it can be limited, but it's really going nowhere and I think personally it will only be more damaging in the long run to keep children (at least if School age) away from things such as tablets as they will then have a rather large disadvantage of not being able to navigate their way around even the most basic of technology when it is going to be so incredibly vital to their future.

There is a lot of lazy parenting out there. You can’t ‘ban’ iPads but you can live without them!

I agree with you overall OP. No matter what games or apps a child will never be able to get the same learning or communication development from a screen. However I also think we live in a world where technology is of ever importance. It's about balance not banning.

'This did not happen 20 or even 10 years ago - what did parents do with their children then? God forbid did they COMMUNICATE with their children at the dinner table? '

Yes it did just different technology. I'm in my 40's. In the early 80's I had two handheld gaming consoles. One was Donkey Kong the other was an octopus game. I played them alot. I also communicated, climbed trees, rode my bike, swam in the sea and in the pool, played backyard cricket etc. Really, if anyone saw me glued to my gaming console they could've easily assumed that I did little else or assumed my parents didn't interact with me and they would have been wrong.