Ban iPads & Tablets For Children

[londonmummyof1]

Is it just me, or does the iPad generation bother anyone else?

We went on a family holiday to Spain with my husband and almost 3 year old daughter, and at breakfast, lunch and dinner it’s the same sight - parents bringing out iPads for their preschool children to sit and watch - while eating!?! This is something I have never seen before and I absolutely do not agree with. I think seeing the scale of the problem during this one holiday shows what a problem this is. The thing is, the children aren’t even given the choice of asking for the iPad or to watch a show, it’s just slapped down in front of them and then they are glued. No interaction, just plugged into this simulated world, at the prime time in their life they are developing their language, speech, behaviour and personality - under the age of 5.

We did not bring an iPad for our child on holiday because we wanted to play in the swimming/splash pool, go to the beach etc and we spent such quality time with our child with memories we will keep forever.

This did not happen 20 or even 10 years ago - what did parents do with their children then? God forbid did they COMMUNICATE with their children at the dinner table?

What is happening to this world? Why not have a conversation with your child or bring a sticker book or story book for them to look at if feeding time is difficult. Every parent has been there with challenging mealtimes, but lugging the iPad around during 3 mealtimes, that’s a minimum of 3 hours your child is in a zombie state of mind, you’re starving them of developing their speech and ability to play by themselves and entertain themselves through play.

Do parents understand that too much screen time is extremely damaging to young children and can pave the way to obesity and development issues later in life?

I feel so passionate about this topic, as I’ve even seen some parents putting their children in pushchairs by the swimming pools glued to an iPad, when they could be swimming and having fun with their parents or siblings.

Parenting can be really tough, but somehow I think government intervention is required as this is such a vicious cycle, what future are we preparing our children for???

Simple alternatives to iPad/Tablet entertainment:

Play doh
Stickers
Books
Playing cards
Colouring books
Drawing

Absolutely BAN iPads & Tablets for children.

We spent such quality time with our child with memories we will keep forever.


Marvellous


I give her a simple task - she quite likes wiping her table or toys or sweeping! She has a mini children’s toy sweeper and uses that while I vacuum and clean.


Jolly good



While cooking, she has a little children’s stool from Ikea and watches me cook and I let her wash vegetables etc or help with some tasks like mashing if we have mashed potatoes for examples.


Super

I'm sorry, some of this makes me really cross. Just because we might bring out electronics whilst waiting for a meal, don't like sticker books, might want to read an actual book on holiday or have an hour of peace and quiet or have never let DC experience the joy of mashing a potato does not make us shit parents. And it certainly doesn't require some sort of government iPad intervention.

My twins are only 20 months and a tablet loaded with Hey Duggee has saved my life on multiple occasions - especially in hospital waiting rooms when we’re sat there for 3+ hours, and even more so when my son was in hospital for a 15 hour fast and it was the only thing that stopped him crying. He must have watched it solidly for the last six hours. It worked - not sure what else I could have done since hugs, talking, toys etc all made him cry.

I think perhaps if people weren’t so intolerant of children being children in public places, parents wouldn’t feel so desperate to keep them subdued and silent with technology.

I agree that they can be overused but I think they’re great. There are some brilliant apps both for education and fun.
Some days my dcs will be on them a lot and other days, we’ll do the kind of things you’ve described and more.
I wouldn’t appreciate a ban.

*starting school without words, self-care abilities, unable to use a pencil, hold a book, understand how to make a jigsaw or play with sand and water

Is that because of tablets though? I seem to recall that sort of thing has been talked about for well over a decade, maybe over two!*

I would think it has become much more pronounced in the last few years. I would imagine in a few years time there will be a vast amount of information as to the collapse of creativity in young children. The physical effects are well documented already - obesity, lack of playing outdoors, the stunting of independence... the emotional and intellectual effects take longer to become apparent.

And it certainly doesn't require some sort of government iPad intervention.

Well. Apple themselves are bringing out tech to allow parents to limit it so they must be worried about the genie they have let out of the lamp!

I don't hesitate to bring out an iPad for our two-year-old when we go out for meals. He, like lots of toddlers, can be extremely hard work in a restaurant setting and can scream/whine/whinge over everything which can be annoying for others trying to enjoy their meal. The iPad means he will sit happy and content as anything for the whole thing. What's not to love? He has plenty of time doing all the play doh and fresh air and colouring bla bla bla every day.

We did the same with DD at that age. She is now 7 and doesn't use an iPad out in restaurants and behaves wonderfully.

It just makes it easier, especially when invited to big family meals for birthdays etc that tend to be quite late and run past their bedtime

There’s been talk about the reduction of creativity and creative skills in children but that seems to be attributed to the target driven education system.

Well. Apple themselves are bringing out tech to allow parents to limit it so they must be worried about the genie they have let out of the lamp

That's already available. They're responding to demand.

Well. Apple themselves are bringing out tech to allow parents to limit it so they must be worried about the genie they have let out of the lamp!

But surely the point here is that parents will limit it. So those parents that feel it's an issue will limit use but others will choose not to. It's not a overarching ban on iPads.

Okay OP, I agree with you, in as much as I do judge parents who whip out iPads during meals out. We have friends who plug their pair into iPads when we go out. I do wonder how they will learn to interact and behave without screens. Our pair have been made to interact and are now pretty bomb proof to take out, it wasn't always easy, we have had to finish early, take one out etc. However maybe we were just lucky with our pair and maybe the next generation of DC will turn out fine anyway. It may well be that I am just an old fogey. Only time is going to tell. However if you are going to have screens for god's sake either silent or headphones. Also it isn't for governments to get involved in this stuff.

I agree that some parents use these things too widely and too frequently. We have a rule for ourselves not to have the iPad in the car (so no watching movies etc) and not in restaurants etc. I think it can be tempting to use and then it keeps snowballing.

But YABU to talk about a government ban! Unenforceable and an incredible level of police state to do that. They will probably do some public health ads in the next few years about electronics the way they do about healthy eating/exercise, but that’s as far as their interference should go.

What would happen to children with SN whose parents may rely on the iPads to keep their children happy when out and about? Would they have to prove their SN to the iPad inspectorate?

Actually I’d probably support a hit squad enforcing headphone use with iPads etc. I find it amazing that some people think I should have to have my meal hearing Peppa Pig so their child can watch it.

Isn’t it quite well known that those working in tech often really limit iPad use for their kids? Steve jobs and Bill Gates were strict about it too.

We went on a family holiday to Spain with my husband and almost 3 year old daughter

So you have one 2 year old and you are so confident in your parenting abilities that you are able to advise parents of multiple and older children, many of whom may have (gasp) different personalities and needs to your child how best to occupy their children in situations that you have absolutely no idea about.

I'm sure you think that your ideas are new and enlightening, but has it occurred to you that most parents are aware of the existence of sticker books and felt tips, but they are also fairly well-acquainted with their own children and know best how to keep them entertained and occupied while out and about.

For example - my son struggles to sit still and all the sticker books in the world are not enough to keep him occupied for long. Normally, we would limit the places we eat out to those which we know have swift service, or places where he can run around while waiting for food, but this isn't always possible on holiday. The fact that we are also eating out more often while we're on holiday means that he gets tested to his limits and, because we are engaged and involved parents, we recognise that at times like this he needs to zone out a bit and so we allow him some time on his tablet to avoid him getting overwhelmed.

And he's a child with no additional needs or SEN - those who find it more difficult to adjust to new situations might find that they need something familiar to help them keep it together. I know that a lot of parents struggle to deal with the judgmental attitudes of others, and it's disappointing to see a post such as your pronouncing in such an unnecessarily critical manner on the parenting of others from an apparent position of limited experience and understanding.

I've only had about ten years (and as an already-developed adult) of smartphones, and get twitchy quite easily if I've forgotten mine. However, I do find that there is a kind of release involved when you are actually forced to maintain the kind of deep focus a novel requires, or pay attention to playing with the dog, or just noticing the flowers etc, and I end up enjoying the freedom.

I can only imagine the distress of teenagers (and the trouble that ensues) when they are deprived of their screens if they've been accustomed to them from toddlerhood.

So I broadly agree with you, OP, although I suspect that many posters have been irked by your judgemental tone, especially if it's touched a nerve. Don't get me wrong: I'm the queen of Anything For An Easy Life, but I do believe that over-reliance on tech is storing up trouble for the future.

@pannikin

we all know which type of parent you are

What do you mean by bad? There's plenty of evidence to show it has negative impacts on children.

Sleep?

Attention?

Information retention?

Which area and I'll make it materlialise.

If only we could all be such wonderful examples of parenthood as the op!

Actually, I find my dc's tablets great alongside their numerous other activities. And they are perfect for long journeys and boring long meals out. Their development doesn't seem unduly stunted.

YANBU. Most parents are lazy fuckers.

Yanbu, I completely agree op.

scholar.google.co.uk/scholar?hl=en&as_sdt=0%2C5&q=children+screen+time&oq=children+scree#d=gs_qabs&p=&u=%23p%3DkFU-ozI43K0J

While I agree that there is definite evidence that too much screen time is bad for kids, and our kids are getting too much, a restaurant in Spain is not a good place to gauge screen use. If my kid gets screen any screen time at all, it will be waiting for food in a foreign country - well, that and on areoplanes.

Steve jobs and Bill Gates were strict about it too.

I bet the people who were actually parenting their DC day to day made the actual decisions. With their ovaries. I find that frequently men are excellent at saying how amazing their parenting is while delegating the actual parenting to their wives, girlfriends and nannies.

Oh OP you might have a point in some circumstances but God you come across really, really badly.

Awful.

I totally agree with you OP. It really scares me how this current generation will turn out. Even if they’re playing educational games on it when they’re little, it’s the habit of using one and the fact that that will become socially acceptable that scares me (not to mention losing the ability to think creatively to come up with games etc to play when they’re bored in these situations).

I’ve got some friends who always bring iPads to brunch for their kids, and inevitably our kids join in and look over their shoulder. It turns them all into zombies - I’ve given up trying to talk to them when they are all glued to an iPad. So they’re totally missing out on family conversations. We are in the Middle East, so this is where restaurants are a lot more child friendly than the UK - there is usually a kids room attached to the restaurant for them to go and play in and they won’t even do that if there’s an iPad in front of them.

I feel really strongly about what we are doing to this generation with iPads and I think it’s awful. I can totally see the appeal for parents, especially in England where kids don’t seem to be very welcome, but I think the long term damage to social skills and creativity is going to be huge. It really depresses me.

Incidentally, I do have one time when my three kids are allowed to play games on my phone - it’s when we have hospital appointments. They find it really stressful and it’s important to keep them quiet for the sake of other patients

It's modern technology. When radios were first widespread lots of people expressed concern it was killing the art of conversation and children should be out playing not sat around the wireless. TVs the same, then computer games.

The next generation will worry about some other technology. It's the same as every generation thinks the world is going to the dogs or children these days don't have manners etc etc.

That's all it is.