To wonder how many children you’d have, in an ideal world?

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I’ve just had one and I can’t decide whether I’m done, or I want 20! 😁

If you didn’t have to worry about health, money, job, the pesky practicalities... How many children would you have (/had)? Why?

DD is our only, and likely to remain so for many, many reasons. In an ideal world where none of those reasons were an issue, I would love DD to have a sister, and I would love to have a boy.

That doesn't mean I'm not happy as I we are though - because I am. Our little family is wonderful, and more than I dreamed I would have for many, many years.

2

1. Baby 1, wait a year, baby 2, wait two years, baby 3, wait a year, baby 4

None, the same as in my actual world. I don't know how people can put up with their noise. I feel very blessed.

0 in an ideal world.

I have had 0.

I suppose it's an ideal world for me in that I had that choice as many don't.

i have 2 but would love 3. just cant do the baby years over again and dont have the room for number 3. plus our lives are great and i wouldnt want to make everything harder again by including a dependant baby. would put a stop to certain holidays, days out - everything would be harder.

I'm very happy with my 2.

I came close to planning a 3rd, it was the unideal realities of pregnancy and post-birth recovery that made me stall. I needed a break after a two year gap, then it was spacing out to an awkard spread of ages.

My ideal family would also include childre that get ready without nagging. The word "SOCKS!!!!" is a very effective contraception.

Ideal for me, none. One if I had to.

Interesting seeing how many have said 4- I have 4 and often get looks of pity from people when out in public which make me feel crazy for wanting so many!

In a dream world, I think I would happily have 6. We have quite small age gaps (7,5,3 and 2 months) so if I was to have more I would want to wait until youngest was about 5. There’s no way I’ll have any more though because it would feel very selfish and I think would be unfair on the kids to split our already limited time and attention between more children.

That being said, I sometimes dream of having an only child and being a lone parent. There’s something about the bond that must create that I’m very envious of- one of my biggest fears in having a large family is that the kids get swept up in all the commotion and become ‘the children’ rather than individuals who I have individual bonds with. In school, I had a friend who was an only child and whose parents were split up and her dad was out of the picture. As a teenager, her and her mum had this incredible bond which I always envied as me and my mum were never close. To this day they are still incredibly close and I think it’s lovely, and I’m painfully aware that it’s going to be much harder to have that with my own daughters because there are 4 of them so it’s harder to spend one on one time with them

1. But it wasn't to be.

...

We have 6.. quite enough and no amount of money would persuade me to have more. Too old now anyway

I'd have really liked three, I'd settle for two but in reality, I'm very lucky to have one.
Doesn't stop me being insanely envious of other people's ability to choose how many children they would like and the ease at which they seemingly get pregnant. It's very unattractive and unhelpful to be jealous but I am.

If I didn't have to worry about money, work, had a nanny etc I would probably just keep having them spaces about 4 years apart until I couldn't anymore. I would probably end up with about 5-8 depending on how fertile I am.

I'd say 4 if no worries about money.
I'm having a massive dilemma at the moment about having another baby.
My dd is 2, but her father isn't involved and I'm an only child so she has no cousins or siblings.
I feel really bad that she'll be alone, not to mention the absolute terror at the thought of her losing me while she's still a child.
On the other hand I'm not actually sure I want to go through having a baby again and I'll also be able to give her a fab life if I haven't another one to pay for.
It's a really tough one.

Two is enough for me. Even in an ideal world with more time and money.

I have head space for two, more and I'd be struggling.

Yep, me too.

When I was young I wanted the usual 2 (one boy one girl).

By the time I started seriously ttc I wanted about 4.

After several years of infertility I would have been quite happy to have concieved sextuplets.

After multiple miscarriages I ended up with just one.

I'm not sure, but I'm certainly hoping I have more (I have two now).

I have 2 but would love 3 just. I have always wanted 3cant tell you why

In an ideal word none. I love the 2 I have, but really I'd have preferred to stay as a research scientist but couldn't due to money.

I have 2 but ideally I would have liked 4 (2 boys, 2 girls).

I cant really explain why but I think it was because I was an only child and hated it, I always wanted a crowded house full of hustle and bustle but it hasn't happened due to divorce and my DP having already had a vasectomy and other issues when we met nearly 14 years ago.

My youngest is now 16 and wants to go to uni in 2 years so I will have an empty nest at 44 and that is making me a bit wistful. I really am grateful for my 2 wonderful DC's that I do have though.

1. I have 2. Worst decision ever.

We have three, and feel very lucky because we were told we would never have even one. For a while we wanted 4, but actually 3 is pretty perfect for us.

2 I have one sister and two is a nice number.
Only have one and struggling to conceive number two so don't want any more and can't face TTC again if I ever get pregnant.

I have 3. I don't want any more now. I've been sterilised to make that as unlikely as possible.

However, in an ideal world, where my DH was on board with more children and we were wealthy and not needing to both work FT and there was not an issue with overpopulation, I'd have had more.