Husband annoyed because I didn't wake him up for work

[labradoodle32]

I set my alarm for mornings slightly earlier than my husband so I can get a head start in the shower ect. Each morning I am running around like a headless chicken trying to get kids fed and dressed for childminders and he's still sleeping until I wake him to tell him get a move on even though he sets his own alarm he just knocks it off including the snooze function. This morning I've left him sleep got the kids ready and just received a text saying how late he is for work ect and why didn't I wake him ect. I feel it's not my job to wake him and he's an adult and should be able to take responsibility for himself. I'm also thinking of starting work at 6am to be home more with the children in the afternoon so how can I expect him to get himself and two kids ready if he can't even get himself up for work?

he should be helping in the morning with the kids, so id say YABU to not waken him and say get up and help!

Blue just because he is woken doesn't mean he would help anyway.
He shouldn't have to be woken up by his wife for get help get there children ready.
If he wants to help get them ready he should be up and willing.

Is everyone missing the point where OP is always the one to get up with the kids while he sleeps and expects her to wake him up. Or are we all just set on the idea she is cruel because the manchild always relies on her?
Bloody serves him right!

If your married your a partnership, a team. You look out for each other.

I knew people would think it was shit advice, but I don't think there's anything wrong with discussing how you deal with mornings together!

I'm shit in the morning but do most of the running about later in the date - what of it? Work out a way of living together pulling on your strengths and then do it.

The OP hasn't mentioned whether her OH is a lazy arse the rest of the time I don't think, but I do get fed up with morning people thinking they are more virtuous than those of us who aren't! There are loads of things I don't love doing but get on and do them without moaning because I care about my family, the fact I'm woken up gently in the morning with a cup of tea in bed is one way they show they care about me too!

Thank you to whoever suggested the alarmy app, I often sleep in (just enough to end up in a rush when I get up), I downloaded it and have the maths problem alarm set, it looks brill.

I agree, @ladyme my DH helps me wake up with a cup of tea, which I really appreciate. In return, I have tea ready for him when he gets home from work, having brought our DDs home from school. It's called team work.

I'm shit in the morning but do most of the running about later in the date - what of it? Work out a way of living together pulling on your strengths and then do it.

Exactly this

Yabu, it's not really about if it's your responsibility or not. How about you do things for him because you love him? Relationships are about give and take.

I doubt OP would be so annoyed and post here if her DH was pulling his weight during the rest of the day.

Women are usually at the end of their tether when they post here about their useless husbands.

@Shumpalumpa that is true, good point. Though sometimes people do get caught up in petty battles and it's helpful to reflect on the whole life rather than just the time they've pissed you off. I find that helpful in my relationship anyway.

What @shumpa said.

As for not being his mother and waking up Baby Boy, what’s done is done. Now he’s learned the hard way to be an adult and get the fuck up.

Next chapter, getting up earlier to help his wife with their children.

He should be getting up to help you.

You should have said you weren't going to wake him BUT you should never have started in the first place.

He will know better tomorrow!

How about you do things for him because you love him?Relationships are about give and take.

How about him getting up to help her to get the kids ready, because he loves her? Unless you mean she should always be the one giving and he taking.

Well presumably OP likes her husband's income coming in, so maybe its a good idea to make sure he's up in time if he's not been able to do it without warning.

Relationships are about give and take

Yes. She gives. He takes the piss

Do all the surrendered wife types realise the OP also works?

@chocolatecoffeeaddict are you serious? If he's capable of holding down a job he's capable of getting himself up in the morning. Can you imagine if the OP just decided she was no longer a responsible adult and waited for someone to wake her up?
He sets his own alarm he just chooses to ignore it.

Honestly, i feel like I've been transported back to the 1950's reading some of these responses.

Wtf? That's a him problem, not a you problem. Is he six?

I doubt OP would be so annoyed and post here if her DH was pulling his weight during the rest of the day.

^ This.

Anyway, OP hasn't been back to clarify whether he pulls his weight in other areas of the relationship or not.

*@pencilSharpenerer *

I gave him your message, he said, Ahahahahahahah! T*, (wouldn't want to say the word as it's insulting)
I'm guessing his reaction to you saying that is because he would laugh in my face if I expected him to wake me up every day.
I'm guessing your one of these really fun people with no sense of humour, and possibly a bit of a pushover.

Sorry, I couldn't get past the liberal sprinkling of ects.

Well presumably OP likes her husband's income coming in, so maybe its a good idea to make sure he's up in time if he's not been able to do it without warning.

I'm wondering if this post Is from a man?

It’s this shitty attitude that’s the problem. Too many men think that because they work, they can act like spoiled brats who don’t need to do anything around the house or for their wife and kids. Even if, ironically, their wives work too.

Yes, Shadow666, I completely agree!

'Well presumably op likes her husband's income' - well presumably husband likes having kids