To think playgroups shouldn't give out junk food?

[neonyellowshoes]

I go to one may be once a fortnight. The standard snack is fruit plus juice (don't agree with the juice) but there is always other shit 'just this once'. Chocolate, cake, iced biscuits today...

This is publicly funded.

It's a nice group but the shit food is putting me off.

Am I being precious?

Playgroups I took my children to in the 80/90s didn’t offer snacks at all - just water. The children really enjoyed it, and didn’t seem to be expiring with hunger or suffering any loss of energy.
Other people seem to think they have an automatic right to ‘treat’ our children, while we get left to try and persuade them to have something healthy after they are already full. Why can’t we be left to treat our children ourselves?
This isn’t just playgroups. It is continuous, family, friends, acquaintances, restaurants and cafes that offer fizzy drinks before your child has had a chance to eat any of the food you’ve bought from them...
If it was just parties, that would be fine. But it isn’t, is it?

@TheMonkeyMummy I won't flame you, but don't be fooled in thinking that the raisins are healthier than the biscuits.

I don't like to judge people (I used to pre-DC and I cringe at my former self) because it can be really hard to get children to eat healthy food and not want the sugary/fatty alternatives. My 4 YO tells me he'll eat fruit "when he's 5" every time I offer him or give him fruit. He won't even put it in his mouth. He used to eat fruit until he was about 18/24 months and atarted eliminating foods. In the last six months I've managed to increase the variety in his diet and he eats at least 6 forms of vegetables now (doesn't sound a lot but we went from almost everything to nothing). You can't make children eat but you can limit the options to make their choices healthier.

But I still don't pull my hair out when he eats a biscuit at the one playgroup he goes to a week, I just don't give him high sugar foods in his lunch box for pre school that afternoon.

I personally think it is very short sighted to blame the obesity crisis on just the fact we eat too much of the wrong foods. Maybe that is true, but why do we do that? I am an adult, and I am slightly overweight. I know full well what I need to eat to be thin, but I still don't. Why? I am neither lazy nor stupid.

For me it stems from two things

1. only being allowed healthy food as a child and as a result binging on these foods when I could get hold of them as a teenager. This has continued into adulthood.

2. using food as an emotional crutch when I am sad or lonely

People need to think a bit deeper. Biscuits at a playgroup do not an obese child make. It's a whole host of factors at play. Restricting foods can be extremely damaging.

Other people seem to think they have an automatic right to ‘treat’ our children, while we get left to try and persuade them to have something healthy after they are already full. Why can’t we be left to treat our children ourselves?

I do agree with this. We go to two groups a week where the children are given biscuits (fine). My dad has DD2 for a few hours a week and always gives her a treat. My mum will bring a treat for them both at the weekend. DD1 has a birthday party every couple of weeks. If it’s someones birthday at pre school they get handed a bag of haribo or some cake at snack time.
Of course I control what I can, but the result is that I never feel able to treat my children because they get so many elsewhere.
Still don’t think a playgroup serving biscuits is a huge issue though.

So@ILostItInTheEarlyNineties, feeding your children shit food regularly is bad yet holding this opinion is silly?

You've just contradicted yourself.

The double think is strong on this thread....

Hilariously enough my sister was told off at the dentist for giving her dc too much fruit.

I used to help run a toddler group. We have offered a plain biscuit to the children under parental supervision. Also had chocolate biscuits and tea and coffee for adults. We offered community and socializing and a friendly ear.

There is always the solution of running your own group and putting the time and commitment in.

I agree OP! I assume you've followed the WHO guidelines of breastfeeding till way past 2 years old, that helps reduce you risk of diabetes too! And isn't full off all that refined crap you sure want to avoid ...

A little bit of 'crap' food isn't bad OP, is as raised on homemade healthy food, and when I had access to my own crap food I went far too mental as it was such a treat.

Everything in moderation, so long as your little one gets exercise and a decent healthy diet I am sure he will be fine

@soydora, the one biscuit at playgroup isn't the issue, but it is symptomatic of the normalisation of feeding other people's kids junk.

@takeoffyourpantsandjacket, if they did not eat the fruit, they were not hungry. If kids are not hungry, we should not be coaxing them to eat by waving sugar at them.

@Today 03:00 Loopyloopy

@boredandtired it's not that hard to make healthy snacks if that's what you are used to! It goes back to what I was saying about what your "normal" is. Clean up with fruit is easier as well.

Of course, you asked a question I was just giving a reason. Having suffered a fair few playgroups, tipping a pack of biscuits on a plate is quick and easy. I wasn't for a minute suggesting it was 'too hard' to provide fruit... but these groups are often volunteer run, fruit is expensive, so I'd imagine it's an easy habit and cheap. And on the whole it doesn't sound like many people challenge it.

OP, YANBU. All the cake and biscuits around at playgroups does normalise unhealthy food for children. Not a popular view I know so I tend to not say it too loudly IRL.

If kids are not hungry, we should not be coaxing them to eat by waving sugar at them.

Fruit IS sugar.

Sugar is not ok

Actually,as part of a varied healthy diet,sugar is perfectly ok. Just in reasonable quantities.
Healthy balanced diet includes carbs,protein,dairy,veg,fruit and yes fats and sugars.

Absolutes like x is not ok are not helping anyone and do not promote a healthy attitude to food either.

No it's silly to think that feeding your child a treat food occasionally spells doom neon.

I know regularly feeding my children treats would be bad for their health. I was fine with them having a biscuit at toddler group as a mid morning snack. I think you need to relax about that.

They're more or less grown up now and unscathed.

I do think it's hilarious that trendier playgroups offering dried fruit, organic biscuits and a "no sugar" date and fig cake containing a fuck tonne of Manuka honey are seen as healthy.
Let's not dress that up. You're giving your child a sugary snack and you need to adjust the rest of their food that day accordingly.

@moodytwo I did this. Not to avoid diabetes... or to avoid refined crap, it just happened. One of my children had horrific teeth issues from the extended breastfeeding. At the end of the day if they feed a lot and milk is constantly running over their teeth day and night, it can still cause problems. I was devastated.
I'm perfectly happy to have the treat decision in my own hands. As a parent of you go to a party or visit someone and they have a treat that is on your terms. Maybe they shouldn't just be offered routinely at groups and things, they generally are not in school.
One of mine was very fussy but we managed to find enough to keep him balanced and healthy but due to the teeth issues he couldn't eat anything 'hard' so he automatically rejected things like apples, carrots etc. After a few months in reception where they are offered fruit and water in cups, he now drinks water and asks for it at home and eats carrots (he had 2 yesterday) and apples. So if school is helping change what he eats (he wasn't an unhealthy water before but everything had to be soft) and drinks, then by starting at toddler groups healthily that's not a bad thing.

My in laws bought up their sons 'sugar' free. (Kind of ironic as she now is the worst person for bringing chocolate and treats into my house... but anyway) she had 3 children. They were not allowed sweets, chocolate or biscuits etc. My husband has amazing teeth, and does not have a sweet tooth at all. He eats very well and is very careful about food in the house. His 2 siblings however as soon as they could lay their hands on sugar they went crazy! They eat sweets and biscuits now a lot and in their teens were constantly bingeing on their stashes. So I guess they are all different.
We were most strict with my eldest, everything had to be organic and he had no processed foods, never went to a fast food chain, didn't taste chocolate till late etc etc (no tv🤦🏻‍♀️ I liked to make my life hard...) and now at 20, he eats fast food every day, refuses normal food, eats sweets constantly, drinks energy drinks and soft drinks every day, has bad teeth and reflux problems from his poor diet... so all the things I spent all that time doing were completely pointless!!
I'm definitely more relaxed with my younger children

I'd take water with us and then allow my son to have a little treat with his friends. DS eats lots of fruit and veg at home etc. I wouldn't worry. I think I'm wary as I had an ED as a teenager and don't want him to be afraid of food. Everything in moderation. (Still would avoid fruit juice though)

Just to add, I was told by my sons consultant that orange juice is good to drink as it helps the absorption of iron so a little bit of fruit juice isn't always a bad thing...

a little bit of fruit juice isn't always a bad thing...

A little bit of anything isn't bad. It's excess that is bad.

@lapenguin absolutely. Mine don't eat much meat if any so it's a really important addition to diet.
My friend though, who was a no biscuit giver and sweets were fruit, only gave her DC's fruit juice as a drink as squash was spawn of the devil. All of her children had cavities and teeth problems because they had so much acid washing over their teeth. She was devastated as the dentist told her they needed to cut back on biscuits and sugar, which they had never had... it was the constant fruit juice.

@Rebel - it's peoples definition of 'little bit' that seems to be the problem. A little bit of fruit juice once a day isn't going to hurt, in fact its beneficial. Some people obviously go over board and some people think that even once a week is too much.

@Bored yes! Ironically a lot of squash is sugar free.. It's also knowing what to pair it with. Cheese is good to eat alongside something sugary, I can't remember the science behind it but it helps protect your teeth or counteracts the sugar on your teeth or something. People underestimate how much sugar is in fruit, like sweet treats it should be consumed in moderation and at certain times.

it's peoples definition of 'little bit' that seems to be the problem.

Definitely.

Sugar is not ok

It is as part of a healthy and varied diet

Treats all the time are not ok

The concept of treat food just buys into the narrative there is good food and bad food.

@ILostItInTheEarlyNineties

Whilst dried fruit (for example raisins) is high in sugar, all sugars are NOT equal. Let's not get confused about that.

Here are labels for a chocolate biscuit (blue) a plain biscuit (green) and raisins (white). (Sorry I don't live in the UK so can't use well known brands).

Whilst it is clear that the raisins have the highest amount of carbohydrates, and again with those that sugar, don't forget that this isn't processed sugar that is found in the biscuits. The raisins also have the lowest amount of calories, fats, and salt. Raisins contain fiber, vitamins and minerals, potassium and are known to contain phytonutrients.

So if you are just looking at sugar, yes, they are not the 'healthiest'. But (as always) it is much more complex than that, and they are definitely a nutritious option.

I think this thread demonstrates perfectly how confusing nutrition is these days.