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AIBU?

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Original poster

Giving toy guns as gifts

258 replies

juneau · 28/05/2018 19:11

I'm not sure whether I'm being unreasonable or whether others feel like this.

DS was 7 earlier this month and he had a party which his school friends came to and he was given three toy guns as gifts. Now I know it's up to people what they give and that as the recipient's parent I don't get a say, and I should be grateful that these DC came to his party and brought him a gift (and I am), but I would never give a gun as a gift. I think it's really inappropriate and I'm very uncomfortable with having even toy guns in my house. Seeing my 7-year-old running around with a gun (albeit a plastic one), and shooting at us and laughing is horrible. And of course he loves them and he was given them and if I took them away then I'd be the bad guy Sad

OP posts:
Delphiniumum · 29/05/2018 23:26

It’s easy to let your kids watch tv without adverts. You sound lazy

Mine rarely watch adverts because it's on iPlayer, I was just throwing out possibilites. You think never letting them even see a gun is helpful? Imagine being a kid and you don't even know what a gun, even a water pistol. Seems mad to me, but you do you.

Delphiniumum · 29/05/2018 23:27

Not skipping adverts doesn't make you lazy btw. For all you know I only have Freeview and can't skip them Grin (I don't, but still...)

Deshasafraisy · 29/05/2018 23:28

And you do you. Normalising weapons as fun.

Delphiniumum · 29/05/2018 23:29

I would never begrudge my child a go on Tomb Raider that's for sure.

Delphiniumum · 29/05/2018 23:30

Even bloody Loony Tunes has violence in it

Lowdoorinthewal1 · 29/05/2018 23:50

Not RTFT but:

I think the objection with guns is that they are a modern weapon. Swords represent a historical era and are mainly part of a knights costume.

Yeah.. absolutely this. Gun crime is much more of an issue than knife crime amongst modern youth... Hmm

You can avoid violent play if you can keep your DC away from:
cowboy guns
nerf guns
swords
daggers
water pistols
sticks
pointy fingers
water bombs
throwing anything
wrestling
blink murder
wink murder
'war' games
crossy road
minecraft
roblox
fortnite
any xbox game
any Nintendo game
just the internet in general
Alex Rider books
Beast Quest books
books
games
playing

Look.. just keep them in watching Waybuloo. Anything else won't end well.

SheGotBetteDavisEyes · 29/05/2018 23:52

Don’t foist your adult misgivings about firearms onto kids

I think explaining misgivings about firearms at the right age, in the right way, is an extremely sensible thing to do Confused

AmazingPostVoices · 30/05/2018 00:03

you really think you'll always win?

No of course not. The process of growing up involves challenge and debate.

My children know they are allowed (and in fact encouraged) to form their own views and opinions and to discuss them. They are allowed to disagree.

But this isn’t a democracy. The adults are in charge here.

I’m flexible about all sorts of things other people have strict rules on.

But I don’t allow guns. The children understand why and accept it.

They aren’t seething with resentment.

Lowdoorinthewal1 · 30/05/2018 00:04

Ooh yes, you also need to avoid:

lego sets
Disney
Marvel
DC
Star Wars
Harry Potter
Cluedo
My Little Pony
The Wizard of Oz

Just best to not switch the lights on really.

LookAtThatCritter · 30/05/2018 00:25

YABU and it’s people like you making the younger generations so ridiculous and unable to cope with life Smile

SheGotBetteDavisEyes · 30/05/2018 00:26

Why the 'hilarious' extremes? The 'OOhhh OP best not even teach your DC to read, eh? LOLOLOL' posts are a bit grating.

Just once, it would be good to have a decent debate about this kind of thing. Many MNers live outside the UK and the toy gun debate in New York will be different to the one in Inverness.

It's probably bad luck/Bank holiday shite, but nearly every thread I click on at the moment is just a screechy pile-on only a few posts in, with posters desperate to land blows on the OP/each other.

It just gets a bit boring.

AmazingPostVoices · 30/05/2018 00:30

YABU and it’s people like you making the younger generations so ridiculous and unable to cope with life

Lookatthatcritter apologies, to whom were you directing your comment, it’s not entirely clear?

Delphiniumum · 30/05/2018 00:42

@AmazingPostVoices

I wasn't being "serious" when I said that, it was light-hearted Envy

Delphiniumum · 30/05/2018 00:42

Wrong smiley! Smile //

Delphiniumum · 30/05/2018 00:43

We used to play wink murder in drama classGrin

AmazingPostVoices · 30/05/2018 00:44

Delphinium I wasn’t annoyed with you! I was just replying to the question. It’s all good.

Kursk · 30/05/2018 01:31

I have found that teaching my kids to shoot has taught them:

Control,
Relaxation,
To be Responsible
Some basic physics

Singlenotsingle · 30/05/2018 01:37

My dear sil had 2 boys and refused to let them have toy guns. One joined the RAF Nd did his share of overseas postings to Afghanistan etc.

LoveInTokyo · 30/05/2018 09:40

I think it's inappropriate to give someone else's child a toy gun as a gift.

But I would probably be more concerned about my child playing very violent computer games (particularly shooter type games) than running around with a toy gun going "bang bang!"

I probably wouldn't make a big deal of it and would quietly get rid of them when he has moved on to the next thing.

RideOn · 30/05/2018 11:43

I would be happy with NERF guns, dart guns (with those plastic darts), disc shooters (we have them all) water pistols etc.

Also have a pistol in cowboy dress up (but you can't shoot anything out of it).

We have plastic swords and shields and a bow and arrow.

I don't think I'd gift anyone a machine gun type/weapon. Mainly because they look a bit distasteful.

My many brothers had these and endlessly were "killing" each other and everyone around but they have shown no particular interest in guns or violence from age 11 years onwards.

I was a bit obsessed with homemade catapults and homemade bows and arrows at that age but in retrospect seem a bit dangerous flinging stones/sharpened sticks at each other, so glad mine have no interest in this.

stayathomer · 31/05/2018 00:17

I thought this post was more about giving a gun as a gift? In which case even the 'pro gun' people have to admit introducing a gun into a house or having eg a nerf gun where no doubt at some stage there's a chance of a child getting hit by a bullet/shooting at glass or something equally damaging happening. The people who say you may as well ban x,y or z, it's tot different, kids get hold of guns and become hyper with their first thought being to chase other kids.

insomuchpain · 31/05/2018 00:51

I can't believe how many people are okay with giving their child basically a replica of something that can kill people.

And we wonder why kids are so fucked up. Do they really need to play with something that is so big in the world as a killing machine. Seriously. I'm done.

Uyulala · 31/05/2018 01:06

If it's not a toy gun, they will just pretend to kill eachother with something else. A wand or a light saber, for exampleGrin

LipstickHandbagCoffee · 31/05/2018 06:37

My kids have a replica kitchen maybe they’ll cook each other to death
Killing machine?Oh do stop all the handwringing insomuch . It’s risible
I have regularly given huge nerf guns with extra pellets as gifts,didn’t seek permission and no complaints.ever

stayathomer · 31/05/2018 06:57

Lipstick People would never complain about a gift (well maybe some people;), but you can bet after they got at least one of them said 'ah sh*t'