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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU, cheeky fuckers - a holiday edition

353 replies

HolidayCF · 27/05/2018 19:24

On holiday with all my DC (5 of them), ages 15-3. Single parent. So a busmans holiday really.

2 days ago kids came back trailing another random kid. Happens every year, always kids with no siblings. No problem in theory, 5 kids 6 kids doesn’t make much difference. Then kid would NOT go away. Knocking on the chalet door at 8am, (parents smiling and waving from their decking) 😒, we left for the beach at 10am. An hr later kid turns up with his parents. They sit 50ms away and kid comes over to play.

So now in effect I’m watching their kid plus mine as they sunbathe and read all day. Sent him back at lunch. He comes back the second we stop eating. I send all kids over to his side to play. Mum then brings them back as her husband is asleep!

Again same thing today, kid came to the pool. Didn’t see his parents all day as presumably I’m supervising him? Asked him if his parents knew where he was, he said yes. I went back to his chalet (left teens watching kids) and asked them if they knew where he was. Parents sunning themselves on their deck. Mother at least had the good sense to look embarrassed and said ‘oh he’s loved playing with your lot, send him back if it gets too much’ WTF?! I kind of laughed and said well there is a lot of them, not sure I can supervise him too! She said oh he’s a brilliant swimmer don’t worry

Just finished dinner and he rocks up and starts playing outside with the younger ones. Got ice creams from the shop and couldn’t leave him out as he went with them. I can see the CFs sat two decks over drinking wine and reading.

AIBU to send all kids over there and lock my door for an hour 🤔. How long before they send them back do you reckon?

OP posts:
crispysausagerolls · 28/05/2018 12:29

I agree that you should tell the parents that they are taking the piss

DragonMummy1418 · 28/05/2018 12:36

Has he turned up?
I hope you've gone out for the day! 😊

bringbacksideburns · 28/05/2018 12:46

Just keep taking him back to them. Say to him that he can play with you all another time and you are taking him back now to his mum.

On the odd occasion if it's not too hectic let him stay but on no condition take him anywhere with you swimming etc.

I'd also make sure you get a passive aggressive dig or two in if the hardfaced CF says anything, like " Oh it must be so nice to be able to sit and relax and read a book or watch a film. I have my hands full on my own as you can see but X is welcone to come round another day."

PatchworkElmer · 28/05/2018 12:47

Hope they’ve got the message OP.

FWIW, DS is an only child (still a toddler atm), and DH and I have already had lots of conversations about how we’ll need to be extra attentive on holidays, or let him have friends over a LOT. I think this is something you have to accept as parents of an only- because he’s OUR responsibility. I guess if he tries to latch onto other families, we’ll have to do our fair share. We’d never be this cheeky!

LambChopsMcGee · 28/05/2018 13:43

I get that they want mates for their kid, but if it were me in their shoes I would come too to hang out with you as adults. Sending him over like that is really taking the piss and you are perfectly within your r rights to say so!!

SilverBirchTree · 28/05/2018 14:12

Aw poor kid.

His parents are dicks, I can see why you’re annoyed. But I’d probably keep including the kid because I felt bad for him.

LagunaBubbles · 28/05/2018 14:27

Eatalot you are twisting it. No-one laughed at him. Hmm

GreenTulips · 28/05/2018 14:32

But I’d probably keep including the kid because I felt bad for him

Which is why CF get away with this crap

expatinscotland · 28/05/2018 14:37

I never understand why people in such situations just don't say something to the CFers. You're never going to see them again, they don't pay your rent, they're not your boss. When she sent him over with a 'cheery wave' you just walk him back over to her. 'Look, this is my family's holiday. I'm not running a childminding service. You need to look after your child.' And why would you buy them ice creams? It just encourages the CFs. 'You need to get some money from your parents.'

'Oh, he's a brilliant swimmer!' 'Are you crazy, lady?! I'm not responsible for your child's life and safety in water, YOU ARE. He's not to tag along with us to the beach unsupervised. I'm not a bloody lifeguard!'

WTAF? If he'd got into trouble these parents would be trying to get you in the dock and put you in jail.

All the passive aggressiveness is like water on a duck's back to CFs. They don't give a shit. They only respond to being told you aren't there to serve them.

expatinscotland · 28/05/2018 14:40

Just stop it. 'I've had enough of babysitting. It's time for you to act like a parent and supervise your kid,' and then send him back every time he comes over. 'You need to go back to your van and your parents should be looking after you.' She takes umbrage and again you repeat, 'This is my family's holiday! I'm not here to babysit other people's kids.'

WhatchaMaCalllit · 28/05/2018 14:47

Completely 100% agree with the last post that expat has. I had a whole message typed up but it is basically covered by that post! Smile

Orchidflower1 · 28/05/2018 14:56

So did he arrive op?

Jux · 28/05/2018 15:17

Just say to her that you'd like to have some downtime and you'll be sending them all over to them tomorrow, you want at least two hours so she could take them to the beach or.....

When you're with them, checking them for suncream etcetera, just tell him to go back to his mum so she can check he's drunk enough water, got enough suncream etc. Send him off to her so she has to take responsibility for her own child.

I have to say that as the parent of an only child, people like you were diamonds when we were on holiday. But, I did go and chat to whichever parents dd was hanging out with, invited them over for wine, thanked them quite a lot. DD generally was sent back to us so I could check her suncream and I would often wander over with water, see that everyone was OK including whichever parent/s were being responsible adults, have a chat, offer to take over. I bought the ice creams, and very gladly and gratefully too.

So thank you OP, for looking out for the lad, on behalf of less CF parents of only children. I know what a boon people like you are Star

Mummyoflittledragon · 28/05/2018 15:33

Dd is an only child. On previous holidays when she’s teamed up with other children, it has often been with only children too. We took it in turns to watch them. The last time, it was 2 sisters. But on that occasion, the family wasnt in the least bit interested in supervising their 7 and 8 yo in the water. No way would I do what these idiots are doing. Dd has a medical condition and I wouldn’t trust a stranger to watch her in water.

Juells · 28/05/2018 16:38

So disappointed, having read 9 pages, that the OP hasn't posted an update 😂 I want to hear that she went across and bellowed
I'M NOT A CHILDMINDER

Rachie1986 · 28/05/2018 17:20

Feel for you OP, other parents should be watching. And I'd not suncreen or water or buy ice-cream for, say he needs to she his parents for that x

dwab45 · 28/05/2018 17:41

Sent your kids over and piss off to pub.

Biblio78 · 28/05/2018 17:42

Cheeky sods.

Original poster
HolidayCF · 28/05/2018 18:10

Update: we went out super early doors. Left the teens behind (far too cool for a museum). Got back an hr ago.

Boy had been playing outside all day on his own according to DD. She went up to the laundry bit to put the towels on and he came up the road with her. She turned round and took him back, knocked on the door and said “my family has gone out, he can’t come with me”. Mum told him to stay on the decking.

When she got back he shouted over to ask where we were and she said out for the day. He asked when we would be back and she said after dinner.

We’ve been back 45 mins and he’s knocked on the door with a big box of ice creams for everyone Blush.

Kids all outside playing now, parents still inside. She’s one step ahead this one!

I’ve told him we’re playing cards later so he’ll have to go back after 8!

OP posts:
Original poster
HolidayCF · 28/05/2018 18:12

Why they’ve bothered going on holiday when all they do is sit indoors I have no idea! Other than the beach they haven’t moved. Boy said they got here one day before us

OP posts:
Mummyoflittledragon · 28/05/2018 18:17

Don’t get embarrassed. A handful of ice creams is hardly payment for whet you’ve done for their ds. This is manipulation.

SamanthaH92 · 28/05/2018 18:19

I can see why you'd be annoyed with the parents. He is clearly bored or lonley though. His parents should be taking him on days out and enjoying his holiday instead of them always been indoors. I feel for the little boy but he is not your responsibility.

Jaxhog · 28/05/2018 18:20

Its probably improving his holiday, BUT you can't be responsible for someone else's 7 year old. I know it's unlikely, but if he got lost or hurt while 'in your care' , you would be responsible. And they are exactly the sort of parents who would sue your ass off.

Take him back and (with a witness) tell them that you're happy for him to play with your kids, but that THEY must be responsible for him, not you. So they have to watch him while he's with yours, not you. Make that very clear.

wictional · 28/05/2018 18:22

I think I’d be taking the ice cream and the child back. “Sorry, my kids had one earlier. We’ll be unavailable for the remainder of the week. We’re having family time on our holiday - hope you enjoy your time with your son too!”

Chickencellar · 28/05/2018 18:31

They've done this before , a box of ice creams for entertaining a child for a week , bargain!