To assume if you are anti-abortion, you are...

[Hamandcheesebaguette]

...pro a full, complete and comprehensive government benefits system to fund mothers for at least the first 5 years of her child's life?

I'll tell my story, it's not particularly interesting or traumatic, but had I not had access to a safe abortion at 6 weeks then I honest to god don't know how i would have not have ended up homeless or starving.

When I was 21, I met a man. Same age as me. I was working in an airport, leaving for work at 2.45am and usually not getting home until after 4pm. My take home pay was around £980 per month. After rent in my 1 bedroom flat in the cheapest (and also not particularly pleasant) area in my expensive city, council tax, topped up my gas and electricity meters and phone bill (I didn't even have a TV!) I had £35 left to eat and pay for buses to work for the rest of the month. After only knowing this man for 6 weeks, I found out I was pregnant. I was on the pill, maybe it failed, maybe I had missed a couple, I don't know.

Should I have had that baby... how in the hell would I have been able to provide anything for it on that wage? Oh wait, I wouldn't have had a wage at all bevause I wouldn't have had anybody to care for my baby whilst I was working full time and leaving for work in the middle of the night.

So I assume, if you are anti abortion, and I had had that baby, you also agree I should have been entitled to a reasonable council property (not covered in damp or mould or other H&S issues), my rent paid, my council tax paid, plus money provided for gas, electricity, food etc. Plus some furniture (as I always rented fully furnished and didn't have any furniture of my own at 21), a TV, broadband (or maybe I should have sat in with my baby with absolutely nothing except the walls to stare at...)

Plus possible full training paid for by the government when I could have gone back to work once this baby reached school age, as I wouldn't have been a very attractive job applicant by this point.

AIBU to assume this is tour stance if you insist I should have been forced to have been a mother when I didn't want to be one, couldn't afford to be one?

Bango because the child had no say. The mother did. I doubt your life is so awful you wish you were dead? And honestly whilst I imagine there are a lot like you, I believe there are many more who are grateful they weren't aborted? Do you honestly think most adopted people which they had been?

I don't think you can sanctimoniously bang on about how adopted people feel when you are not adopted nor have you adopted a child yourself (to my knowledge).

I don't wish I was dead. I certainly wouldn't have judged my BM had she aborted me. You don't have the right to either. If you don't like abortions you don't have to have any - the choice is yours, you see.

I asked you to stop using people like me in your hateful arguments, yes. Are you going to?

For God sake I thought we were a modern world not the dark ages.
It's your body it's your decision. You weren't in the right place to have a baby. You deserve to be in a loving relationship, in a stable job with a bit money before you decide to have kids.
You got pregnant. It was an accident, a mistake. You did the right thing for you and that's fine. You have moved on and can plan your future now.
You aborted early on so no I don't see it as murder. You stopped a pregnancy before it turned into a baby.
Life isn't black and white. What a horrendous situation for a woman to be forced to have an unwanted pregnancy, be left with nothing. Either bring up and shut up or give the baby away. Just awful.

I don't think the child should pay for her mistake because she doesn't want to pay herself

Yes absolutely. Let the woman pay. Why not go the whole hog and have a scarlet letter?

I wasn't going to reply again but I feel compelled to make one thing clear, I never meant that anyone who sleeps with someone should pay the price like I'm on a witch hunt for them all like they are evil and should be punished! In an ideal world no one would have to 'pay, they would either be happy about being pregnant or they wouldn't fall pregnant. But if not, someone has to pay and I don't think it should be the baby. Because as much as it angers everyone, that is what I see it as, I can't help that but I see it as life from the beginning.

Miggel sorry to burst your bubble but I wasn't talking about you, I was referring to me. I lost a baby at 6 weeks and I am offended by referring to it as 'just a bunch of cells' that upset me a lot because it wasn't the potential of a baby I mourned, it was the life I knew I had in me. Otherwise I'd have just got over it when I fell preg and again and I didn't. Just becsuse it doesn't offend you or isn't insensitive as far as you are concerned does not mean it wasn't to me, you don't own the rights on that so I'm just as qualified as you to 'use that in my argument

And Bango seriously the hypocracy. You tell me not to talk about something I know nothing about but you have no clue how much I know about it yet feel free to have a go at me. You don't know about my upbringing, or that of my closest friebds/family. I can ASSURE you not everyone who is adopted or gave a baby up feels the same. I know that for a fact thank you

Now I really am done because it seems on here someone can post a goady post about something and yet if you don't agree with it you are wrong and a terrible person for it. I don't judge everyone I made that clear, but I will always judge someone who chooses the pill as birth control and then openly admits they don't bother to keep track of taking it, then expect sympathy for the situation they find themselves in.

I don't agree with Frazzled re abortion but her reference to paying the price was clearly with regard to the foetus not the woman.

I also second her comment about posters having a somewhat casual attitude to contraception. I don't want to see any restrictions on current UK mainland law on abortion but equally I don't think it is unreasonable for women to take steps to ensure as far as they can that abortion isn't needed.