To think getting your hair & make up done professionally for a funeral is weird?

[SingleTakenOliviaBenson]

That basically. My friend's mum's funeral is today and a hairdresser and a makeup artist have just shown up to do her up. She's not well off by any stretch (on benefits, council house), doesn't bother with hair and makeup normally. I'm looking after her 2 DS, getting them breakfast and ready for nursery whilst trying to get ready myself for the funeral.

So AIBU to think this is a little weird?

I can imagine myself doing this. I don't usually even wear makeup, and I know that my mother tries very hard to hide her disapproval and almost succeeds. She won't be there to see me but i would do it because I know absolutely that she would just love it.

Wow OP.

I gave you the benefit of the doubt (i do think glammed up for a funeral is a bit weird but as I've said everyone grieves and copes in different ways), but it does seem that rather than a small observation of ' that's unusual' you actually do just want to bitch about her.
How unkind.

awful friend you are. Her mother died and all you can offer is some babysitting and then bitch about her on mumsnet? Take a bow OP - you win the award for most heartless person on here tonight

my Mum and I were ridiculously close. Did so much together. She loved nothing more than seeing me looking my best and it made her happy. She cared enormously about me and we frequently slobber out together and looked like shit because we were comfortable in each others’ company. But she LOVED it when I looked good.

When she died I was distraught, couldn’t imagine a life without her (I was 26 and she was only 22 years older than me). I summoned every last bit of strength to take myself to the hairdresser and did my makeup myself as I would have done for a special occasion.

I remember feeling that while her body remained unburied, that her soul was still floating around. It was the final thing I did for her. I looked fucking good and that’s what she would have wanted.

Just some food for thought.

Can someone not ask a question on here without being ripped to bits? To be fair I do think it is a bit of a weird thing to organise on the day of your mother's funeral, however, I wonder if, given her circumstances she is trying to make herself feel better and more presentable to the people who will be attending the funeral. She is probably dreading it and if, as you say she was estranged from her mother, she will also have people judging her - that's families for you. Try and be supportive, which I think you are and contrary to the people who are having a swipe at you, I don't think you are being nasty OP.

I do have to say she is really brave for going if she was no contact with her mother. I personally couldn't.

Can someone not ask a question on here without being ripped to bits?
I also think getting professional hair and makeup for a funeral is weird. I took the original post charitably with a 'my friends done this but it's a bit weird and unusual. It's not something I've seen' tone, so replied accordingly.

Then I read the OP's updates which were quite judgey and seemed to smack of ' when it was ME doing a funeral I was so busy doing all this stuff that it didn't even occur to me to put a scrap of mascara on. I don't know how she possibly had time to spend any on herself' and the undertone became quite judgey quite quickly.

I hope your friend or someone who knows her reads your thread and tells her.

Maybe its like a wedding day thing where you will be too emotional or shaky of hand to do these things for yourself.

Unusual but given that it's her mum I say let her do whatever helps. I think I'd be a bit shocked if someone did it for a distant friend or relative's funeral.