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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Or is Meghan Markle making the right choice?

454 replies

CaliforniaDream · 17/05/2018 12:31

I don't know if it actually was her choice or her father's, but it seems to me that it's the right decision for him not to come to the wedding.

He's obviously not at all well and needs to recover from his heart attack. He is also obviously wildly in over his head with the media. I think Kensington Palace have something to answer for there as they should have taken him under their wing from the start and given him more help in dealing with press speculation. But the damage is done and now he has caused himself and his daughter a lot of heartache - that must be causing him stress, and I think he will be happier and more healthy for missing it.

I really feel for Meghan. She obviously had quite a complex and uneasy relationship with her dad. She must feel so betrayed that he went behind her back to have these press photographs taken, and it seems he is also texting gossip fodder directly to TMZ. While there are mitigating factors, he very clearly hasn't been putting his daughter's wellbeing first. If he had, she'd be able to have her dad at her wedding and now she can't.

I hope she still has a great day on Saturday, and that her father recovers, and that she's able to move on from this and have a reasonable relationship with him.

OP posts:
Shockers · 19/05/2018 07:27

I can’t imagine how intimidating the thought of meeting your future son-in-law must be when he’s a member of the British royal family.

KingHenrysCodpiece · 19/05/2018 07:40

I'm worried that Redcrayons has turned soothsayer and we'll be seeing them all pop up on BB and Im a celeb get me out.

GnotherGnu · 19/05/2018 08:09

He had some pictures taken being measured for a suit. wtf is wrong with that? Yes, the palace should have advised him but it wasn't having a lap dance.

How do we know they didn't advise him?

In any event, it doesn't take Einstein to work out that in that situation you don't make deals with paparazzi.

Whitesea · 19/05/2018 09:22

As for being too intimidating, maybe it is intimidating but firstly he is American and hard as it may be to imagine, people from other countries don’t have the inbuilt reverence for the royal family that Eng people have and secondly he was once a successful something in Hollywood, it isn’t like he was a runner in Amazon.

ajandjjmum · 19/05/2018 14:27

No relatives there to support her then Karyatide. Not even the niece she's close to. Sad.

Mumto2two · 19/05/2018 17:16

Looks like the press weren’t too far off the mark with regards that guest list after all..
No other family invited..not even those who are not supposedly estranged...Hmm

I thought the poor mum cut quite a lonely figure sitting there amongst all the pomp and ceremony. Can’t have been easy for her.

Everexpandingwaistline · 19/05/2018 17:23

I agree it's very odd that she didn't invite any family members particularly her mum's side. If she wanted to make a statement & a 'difference' then more members of her African American family would have been there. It's all very well having an American bishop and a gospel choir to reflect her cultural background but Meghan's family circle was noticeably absent. Her mother wasn't even in the front pew, rather she cut a lonely figure in the middle row.

HerMajestysSecret · 19/05/2018 18:16

And the entire Middleton clan were on parade despite the speculation they'd been snubbed. Quite right too after they accommodated Harry and Meghan at Pippa's wedding last year.

mycatistoofat · 19/05/2018 19:40

Pippa wasn't there though was she?

sonjadog · 19/05/2018 19:42

Yes, she was.

mycatistoofat · 19/05/2018 19:47

Sorry yes just seen a photo of her apologies.

sonjadog · 19/05/2018 19:54

I like her evening dress! Both she and Harry look much more relaxed and happy out of their formal gear.

nursy1 · 20/05/2018 03:41

The thought that kept recurring to me as I watched them sitting in church was, “please, don’t hurt him”

PortiaCastis · 20/05/2018 10:12

The thought that kept recurring to me as I watched them sitting in church was, “please, don’t hurt him
That's odd because I was thinking I hope you haven't got somebody else like your old man Harry.

nursy1 · 20/05/2018 10:22

She has his heart in her hands is my impression. She might do right by him, time will tell.

Shockers · 20/05/2018 11:44

Why would Harry have someone else? MM was hardly chosen by the palace for her purity (not a judgment, or slur; I think she’s great).

Whitesea · 20/05/2018 15:07

I thought the same Portia. I was wondering if he can stick to one woman. I hope so.

sonjadog · 20/05/2018 15:11

Is he known for having lots of women on the go?

Heratnumber7 · 20/05/2018 15:13

Pippa WAS there. And her DH.

caperberries · 21/05/2018 07:24

And as several of us predicted, none of MM's relatives or old friends were in attendance. Just a few recent workmates from Suits and a smattering of loose celeb acquaintances. Then she gives a fawning speech in honour of her new FIL, the king in waiting. Those red flags are waving like bunting!

As well as Becky Sharpe, Meghan actually reminds me a bit of Heather Mills... It really is fascinating to watch a master manipulator at work, I'm intrigued to see how it all plays out.

Whitesea · 21/05/2018 08:38

Caper Were you at the reception and heard what she said in her speech Hmm

Shockers · 21/05/2018 08:42

Does people believe that Harry is punching above his weight then? Do they think he’s undeserving of love from someone beautiful, so she must be on the make?

raisedbyguineapigs · 21/05/2018 08:49

Whether or not she hurts him, then it is him alone who will have to deal with that. As a human adult it his his right to make the decision over who to marry. No amount of internet hand wringing from strangers with crystal balls who seem to want him to have forced Cressida Nina's or Chelsy Davy down the aisle against their will can change that. All the people who compared her to Wallis Simpson forget that she stuck with Edward until his death.

Mumto2two · 21/05/2018 12:20

Yes Pippa was there...as was commented by various reporters on a number of occasions, it had very much the feel of a ‘family wedding’. Only that ‘family feel’ was very much one sided. How silly of us Caper, to have believed just a nugget of press speculation on the sparcity of the Markle contingent...Grin

BertrandRussell · 21/05/2018 12:26

We saw about 100 of the 600 guests on the telly- the celebrity ones. Presumably the other 500 were friends, acquaintances and colleagues of both of them? And as far as I know we don't know who the 200 at the evening party were.....

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