DP being gifted £300k as FTB

[Raraoh]

In a fairly new relationship (1 year) and DP early 30s is house hunting and wants my input. Just found out his budget - he is a FTB, London-based with a 300k deposit. Genuinely gobsmacked.

Oh wow op, he's the greatest, you're so lucky, he must be the best catch ever, I'm so jealous, you deserve it hun. Is that what you're after?

He needs to do what the meer minions so - look at properties he likes, and that meets hus needs, check our the deposit needed, work out if he can afford the mortgage.

300k for a £1 mil property is still a large mortgage. What does he earn? Does he need to keep some of that for savings etc?

I don’t think it’s vitriol OP. You’re just weirding everybody out

You have no claim or rights to the property if you are not buying jointly, or you get married but I see you’ve not been together that long so this is a wise move for him, for now.

That's good news op but I think if you'd put it in the property board and asked more specific questions you'd have had more helpful responses.

It's already been said but discuss what?

Right sorry. I didn’t have anyone to talk to irl about it and this isn’t normal to me so just wanted to release to people. No I’m not expecting praise or whatever

You do need to be specific!

I don't think it's vitriol, OP, I think it's confusion ... what is your 'AIBU'? I think it's great he has such a large desposit - he'll be very popular with sellers! - but have you posted on the wrong forum?

You want us to discuss your newish partner's potential house-buy which you'll be assisting in but not have any stake in? Is that right?

Yeah I agree, I don’t think he should buy with me.

Head in a mess as he has just left and I feel weird about it, wouldn’t know what to do with that kind of money. He got it in sad circumstances and I’m the only one he’s told so while excited for him, I’m also a bit weirded out myself

I get it - you just needed to say it out loud to someone because it is quite a surprise but you can't really say it to someone in real life.

totally understand it.

Yep I concur - that is a shitload. All good.

I think the problem is OP is that you've put this on AIBU and not a property section. It has come across like you're boasting and in the first post you didn't say you wanted help, you just said he's got a large deposit on a house.

Yep got it Vladimir

Is he happy for you to discuss his financial circumstances on a public forum.
If a DP of mine did that I think they would find themselves an ex DP fairly quickly.
It really isn't your business is it and I'm not sure what there really is to discuss. An Estate Agent is who he really needs to talk to.

Right sorry. I didn’t have anyone to talk to irl about it and this isn’t normal to me so just wanted to release to people.

Do you think think it’s normal for people on here to have a 300k deposit for a house? I mean maybe if you’ve only ever read a Beanie thread, but to the rest of us mere mortals, this just sounds like a first time poster on a windup.

Your first post sounds like you want to discuss his finances, your second post sounds more like you need advice on what to advise him.

If the first is correct then its none of your business and there's nothing to discuss, if it's the second I would say you're better telling him that you're the wrong person to help him as you simply don't know enough if you have to come here for advice.

What Lindy? This is anonymous isn’t it. And I’ve name changed

Guess he needs to consider location first.
Then size of house, how many bedrooms
Style of house, does he want detached, an apartment, old, modern
Near transport links? Away from busy roads?
Garden?
Any must haves which are personal to him? I would always want a house with a separate utility room for instance.

I understand you OP. You can hardly tell anyone in RL, so want to share it here.

That's quite (a nice) shock.

I'm happy for him if he's a good person.

I don't understand what you want to discuss.

It's as if people don't understand MN at all

It’s sad (I guess inheritance?) but he’s extremely lucky to have this opportunity. Choose wisely, and have fun. Very exciting for him and for you too.

People here are weird. Like they are rushing to be sniffy for some reason.

OP, I get that it must have been quite a shock to hear such a large deposit, and that you just want to tell someone to share the shock!

Soon enough you'll be in the swing of finding somewhere!

Are you gobsmacked because someone gave him 300k?
It happens. Friends of mine were given a deposit when they had their first baby. A Million £ deposit. Lucky bastards

300k is not that much: if your parents own a big-ish detached, now valued around £800 in my area, they downsize for a "modest" 2 bed cottage somewhere for £400k, that frees £300.

One of the possible scenario with ordinary people. Others just have big bank account. Good for them

If he's buying in London, unless he earns a packet so can pay a hefty mortgage, he's going to need that kind of deposit. I wouldn't get too excited!

I don’t understand why your “head is a mess”/weirded out. You don’t need to know what to do with it.

He has a large inheritance. He’s sensibly buying a house.

It’s really inappropriate to gossip about it.