To ask what age you had your children?

[MrsMac12]

Me and dh have been together 4 years and got married 3 weeks ago and have just returned from our honeymoon, we are both 28 turning 29 in September (Within the same week). Anyway he has suggested that we should start trying for a baby straight away and is obsessed with having one before he’s 30 whereas I was thinking of waiting until I was 30 at least.
I don’t know if this has anything to do with it but his mum had him at 21 and my mum had me at 44. I like the idea of doing everything I want to before we have kids (travelling, holidays, just being married). I spoke to his mum and she said she had planned to do things after having her children and them leaving but by the time she got to 50 she couldn’t be bothered anymore and didn’t have the money to do it, my mum on the other hand told me she really lived before having me and my brother, her and my dad had nearly paid off their mortgage by the time they had us and are now happily retired. I’m not trying to base it off either of their experiences and I know everyone Is different.
Just looking for some experiences and opinions?

I have name changed as I think MIL is also on this site

I was 30 & 32, we've been together since early 20's & done a lot of traveling. Once we'd visited the majority of the places we wanted to we both felt ready for DC. Personally I think it's essential to be on the same page with this one or it could easily breed resentment.

OP, I have to ask, didn’t you discuss this prior to marriage? To answer your question, 50 isn’t “old” and just because his mum couldn’t be bothered etc, doesn’t mean you’ll be the same. I had kids young and love the freedom I have now they’re grown. I travel a lot and really enjoy life. Neither you or your DH are “wrong” but I think some compromise will have to be reached.

37 thanks to IVF. Started trying at 32.

I’ve just had my first at 34

One at 18, then 31 and the last at 39. I feel that I was too young with the first and too old with the last one who is now almost 11.

I am expecting my first at 27, DP is 35

Had my first just turned 30. Me and DH weren't on the same page either and it was very hard going for a few years. He is 5 years older so was there before I was.

22 when I got pregnant, 23 when I had her. She was a contraception failure.

She's almost 3 now and I love being a mum.

I was 20 when DD was born. I’m now 24 and will need IVF to have any more children due to Male fertility issues.

32 and 36.
Did some of the travelling we wanted to before kids but not all of it - there was so much we wanted to do that if we'd waited until we'd seen everywhere we wanted to see we still wouldn't have kids a decade later!
We work for charities so there was never going to be a good time financially. We waited until our housing situation was ok for children and then started trying.

29,30 and 40. You’ve got plenty of time!

33 and 38. I've done a lot of travel and don't feel I've missed anything.

Sometimes I wish I'd had dc younger but I wouldn't be the person/dm I am now.

I think being married for a while without dc is nice but all my friends who had been with their partners for a long time before marriage got pregnant very soon after.

28, I feel it was a really good age. Now he's 4 and my health has declined, I feel too old for another.

I had DD less than a week before my 37th birthday. If there was a reliable fertility test (or crystal ball) that could have told be I would get pregnant on my 3rd cycle of ttc, I would have waited a few years longer.

I think if you have an adventurous and inquisitive outlook on life there will always be something else your want to do, see or visit, and therefore there will never be a perfect time.

I'm loving being a mum now though!

Mid and late thirties.

38. We got together when I was 28, started living together 3 years later, married when I was 34 and it took 4 years to have our precious DS. Despite many efforts no more followed and now I'm 45. Don't feel pushed into it, however all the horror stories about how it can be harder when over 35 (for some) have a lot of truth to them.

29 and 33

25 but I've been with my DH since we were 16 so we had plenty of us time before DS arrived. It's so so true that life completely changes when you have children though so definitely wait until you feel completely ready.

17, 21 and 23. We are currently loving life travelling, mortgage paid off and not debt. It's an amazing feeling.

Started ttc at 28, had dc1 at 39 (and trying lots of treatments in between) thanks to ivf.
Late miscarriage at 41. Still ttc dc2.

Its really not as simple as getting your ducks in a row and then ttc. I never imagined it would take so long or that I’d be the one to have a late miscarriage.

There is a big difference between his mum at 21 v your mum at 44. 30 is that place in the middle but I wouldn’t leave it longer just as things do tend to take a bit longer. Hopefully it won’t take you long.

30,31 and 34. With the last pregnancy i felt old and knackered 😆 but i did have a 4 and 3 year old to contend with!

26 and 30. I feel like I haven’t lived yet. Met Dh who is 5 years older than me when I was 18, we got a house when I was 22, married at 24.

I wanted to be done with kids early on so by the time they’re old enough to be independent I was still relatively young and could get some of my life back. Hopefully by 50ish we will get our lives back for us and be able to go on holidays etc together.

24 and 32 big age gap

24,26,28.